


unfair

by basilleia



Category: Haikyuu!!, ハイパープロジェクション演劇「ハイキュー!!」| Hyper Projection Play "Haikyuu!!" RPF
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), Alternate Universe - College/University, Angst, Bokuto Kuroo and Oiks are on the national team, Developing Relationship, Fukurodani - Freeform, M/M, Oikawa is a little shit, Slow Build, Slow Burn, They're All Gay, akaashi is good at math, haikyuu!! - Freeform, slow-burn, there's an awful lot of eating involved
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-12-16
Updated: 2018-03-12
Packaged: 2018-09-08 22:53:45
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 7
Words: 73,440
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8866612
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/basilleia/pseuds/basilleia
Summary: "I'm sorry you've had the inconvenience to come across me, Bokuto-san." "You're unfair, Akaashi. So unfair."





	1. a new beginning

**Author's Note:**

> this is an attempt at an angsty fic I literally gave up on my other one but I'm on break for two weeks and hopefully in those two weeks I can find it in myself to accomplish this fic, I think I have a gool of like, 20K+ words, I hope you're all here for that. 
> 
> Also, apologies, this chapter is kinda boring? It's just an intro- to give a little... insight? Should I say. I am in no way a medical expert so I have no idea if the scenes im depicting in the story are even somehwat accurate, please excuse me if I'm incorrect. I also, have no knowledge on how college courses work. 
> 
> I'm an incompetent piece of shit that doesn't know anything I apologize.
> 
> Anyways, enjoy! 
> 
> -basil

Akaashi was 16 when he had his first seizure in public.

He had been in the middle of volleyball practice when he felt it. -Like a switch had been turned on in his head. 

His coach immediately rushed him to the hospital after he collapsed on the floor, body convulsing without his consent.

When he woke, he saw his doctor standing by his bed- checking his vitals. 

"Hello, Keiji. How are you feeling?" 

"Hello, Ukai-san. I'm feeling alright."

Immediately, Akaashi could tell something was wrong. His doctor's face was grim, wearing the same look he had seen the other wear various times when he was preparing to tell a patient some bad news. 

"Keiji, have you been spacing out a lot, recently?" 

The younger racked his mind for an answer. "Sometimes, in class- I'm copying my notes. And when I look up at the board- it doesn't feel very long but, then, the next thing I know class is finished and I've barely written anything on my paper."

Ukai pulled up a chair, and sat down beside his bed. 

Akaashi kept his gaze steady.

"For now, we're going to run some tests and see if there's anything we can find." 

Akaashi thought for a moment before replying. 

"You've already found something, haven't you." There was a feeling of dread weighing in the pit of his stomach.

Ukai sighed, and leaned back in his chair. "You were always perceptive." 

The raven patiently waited for his doctor to continue, fiddling with his hands on his lap. 

"We ran a CT-scan. Keiji..."

Akaashi knew what that meant. "I lit up like the whole of Akihabara, didn't I?" He laughed. 

Ukai didn't reply.

"Fantastic." Akaashi let his head fall back onto his pillow, and stared at the bright lights that shone overhead.

\---- 

Akaashi was diagnosed with epilepsy when he was 14.

He had been at a family dinner, and the chopsticks fell out of his hands as he promptly crumpled over the table. 

At first it was fine. As long as he took his medicine, he would get seizures on very rare occasions. 

But as time passed, his seizures grew more frequent and more violent. His mom had forbade him from riding bikes and instead opted for him to use the train instead.

He didn't know what kind of epilepsy he had at first, until he overheard it from his mother one day. 

Of course, Akaashi had no idea what he was thinking when he googled the symptoms and long term effects of his disease. 

_"Lafora Disease, also known as Progressive Myoclonus Epilepsy, is a rare epilepsy syndrome that usually involves myoclonic seizures, tonic-clonic seizures, and gradual neurological decline. It is caused by a variety of genetic disorders, and most patients diagnosed with this disease die within 10-years of diganosis, and usually do not live past the age of 25. As of now, there is no known cure..."_

Akaashi had no idea how long he sat there staring at his computer screen, absorbing this newfound information. His mother found him dead-eyed, and silent. 

"Keiji, sweetie? What's wrong?" She took a glance at the computer screen, and hurriedly closed the tab. She kneeled in front of her son, and held his shoulders reassuringly. "Keiji, hey. Look at me." 

Akaashi blinked, his eyes coming into focus and registering his mother's features. "Mom?"

"Oh, come here." She pulled him forward, and Akaashi automatically buried his face into the crook of her neck. 

"I don't wanna die." He whispered, feeling the tears gathering at the corners of his eyes.

His mother gently carded her fingers through her son's curls.

"It's going to be alright. I'm right here." 

Keiji clung onto his mother even tighter.

\---- 

4 years later, now at 18, Akaashi was entering his first year of college under Engineering. For the most part, he had come into terms with his inevitable death. What could he do?

College was good. It gave him a chance to start over and gain some friends, possibly. 

Who was Akaashi kidding? Once all his friends had found out that he was likely to keel over and die whenever he was around, they slowly, but surely- pulled away. Not wanting to deal with the responsibility that came with him. 

Did it hurt? Of course it did. But he understood. Distancing themselves from Akaashi was their own way of coping with the situation- a way of saving themselves from getting hurt. A shitty way of coping, might he add- but nonetheless. 

An attachment like that one, where Akaashi was literally unsalvageable, would be toxic.

But of course, there had to be dorms. He sighed as he looked at the listings.

**DORMS**  
**BOYS DORMITORIES | 2ND FLOOR**  
**210 Kuroo Tetsurou / Bokuto Koutarou**  
**211 Sugawara Koushi / Oikawa Tooru**  
**212 Shirabu Kenjirou/ Kawanishi Taichi**  
**213 Kozume Kenma / Akaashi Keiji**  


The list went on. He could only wish that his dorm mate would want nothing to do with him.

He opted for the stairs (even though his mother had told him to stop doing so when his seizures began to grow more frequent- due to a reasonable fear of her son having an attack while he was on the stairs which would lead him falling and cracking his skull open. Lovely.) because it was quicker, and (thankfully) reached the second floor in one piece.

 

He was greeted with the sight of people bustling about, boxes strewn everywhere as they settled themselves in their respective rooms.

Akaashi surveyed the people who came into view.

The first door to his right was a room with the door wide open, two tall figures laughing rather loudly, as they seemed to be well-acquainted with each other already. Both of them had hair that seemed to defy all the laws of physics- one had two-toned hair that stood up at two points, the other looking like it had never been introduced to a brush.

Across that room to his left was a pair of almost ethereal descent. One of them had perfectly styled brown hair and a smile that made your heart stutter. The other had gentle features and a beauty mark underneath his eye, his hair looking like starlight. The conversation looked like it flowed easily between them.

Next, there were two people quietly talking with one another, snickering as they unpacked their things. One boy had a bowl-cut, (which Akaashi found tragic), and another boy that was styled messily.

There was only one door that was closed, shiny numbers reading ‘213’ on its door. 

Akaashi took a deep breath before typing in the code, and pushed the door open. 

He was met with a boy shorter than him by a few inches- whose hair needed to be re-dyed blonde, as his roots were showing. He had wide, golden eyes, a button nose, accompanied by dainty lips. His posture was also kind of bad. 

"Hi. I'm Akaashi. Nice to meet you." 

"You can just call me Kenma." He sounded bored, but Akaashi felt as if he was being observed under a microscope, his eyes calculating, taking in every detail that came to view. 

Looking around, Kenma had unpacked most of his things, the other side of the room looking bare, which Akaashi assumed as his side. 

As Akaashi set his things down on his bed, neither of them talked. As it seemed, neither of them were adamant on making any small-talk. While it had been awkward, Akaashi was thankful. 

Pulling out one of the drawers in his bed side, he made sure that Kenma wasn't looking as he unloaded most of his medications and arranged them neatly inside. 

He frowned when he couldn't see the labels, making a mental note to place stickers on the caps later on. 

Next, he opened the closet at the foot of his bed, hanging most of his dressier outfits and folding the rest.

His bag was nearly empty, and it dawned on Akaashi that he hadn't brought much with him to college. 

Probably because he wouldn't have the chance to stay here long. His condition was getting worse by the hour- and he knew that. 

A loud knock distracted Akaashi from his thoughts, and he raised an eyebrow at his roommate. 

Kenma stared back at him. "That's... Kuroo, and probably Bokuto. They'll be here a lot. Do you mind?" 

Well, It's not like Akaashi had much more to do. After settling, he had planned on walking around campus just to familiarize himself with his surroundings. 

"It's fine. I was heading out anyway." 

Akaashi saw a brief flash of panic on the smaller boy's face. "I didn't mean leave, I meant do you mind them coming in?" 

"I know. No need to panic Kenma-san." 

He saw the tension ease out of the blonde's shoulders. 

There was another series of knocks, this time louder. 

"Kenma, I swear to god, get your ass out of bed." A low, teasing voice was muffled through the door. 

Kenma reacted almost immediately, pulling the door open. "I wasn't in bed." He mumbled, as the two tall figures invited themselves inside. Suddenly the room felt very crowded. 

"Hey, hey, hey!" The other boy had an aura around him that demanded attention. 

Akaashi stood there, not really knowing what to do. 

"Ah, I see you've settled in nicely. What's it feel like to be a first year again?" The same guy with the terrible bedhead spoke, again. 

"Shut up. I'm only a year younger than you." 

"Oho? Who is this?" The one with the boisterous voice said, bushy eyebrows moving up and down on his face.

"That's Akaashi, Bokuto. Don't scare him." Kenma warned. 

"I'm not!" The other whined. 

"Hello, Bokuto-san. And..." Akaashi trailed off, waiting for a reply.

"Kuroo." Bed-head supplied.

"Kuroo-san. Please excuse me, I'll be heading out for a bit. Please make yourselves comfortable." Akaashi gave a little bow at the end, glancing once before exiting out the door. 

A loud screech was heard from inside, and Akaashi jumped, walking faster, staring at the door confusedly. 

Not watching where he was going, he bumped into someone, causing him to stumble back slightly. 

It was the guy with the 24-carat smile from a while ago. Even from the back, Akaashi could tell it was him. The tell-tale brown and the way it stood up perfectly let him know.

"Pardon me, I wasn't watching where I was going." The raven apologized. 

This time, the guy turned around fully. Akaashi wondered how someone's skin could be so smooth. 

"It's alright! I've never seen you around here! You must be new." The guy finished his sentence off with a sunny smile that blinded Akaashi for a moment. 

He wondered why the brunet was so familiar. Then it clicked. Oikawa Tooru. The star-volleyball player with the vicious serves. 

Akaashi lowered his head slightly. "Yes I am, Oikawa-san. Please excuse me." 

Before Akaashi could fully get away, Oikawa called out again. "I didn't get your name?" 

Akaashi turned, mentally berating himself. "How rude of me. Akaashi Keiji. Nice to meet you." Akaashi gave a weak smile, before descending down the stairs. 

As Akaashi sauntered away, Oikawa raised an eyebrow after him. 

Sugawara chuckled. “What, do you feel threatened?” 

“Over my dead body.” Oikawa snapped back at his friend. 

Sugawara laughed. “You have to admit, the guy has some nice eyes.” 

Oikawa huffed, turning his nose up in the air and crossing his arms. “Have you talked to Daichi?” 

“Nope, he said he’ll call me when he finishes.” 

“That’s so funny that our boyfriends are roommates.” Oikawa snorted. 

As the two of them talked in the hallway, in Kenma and Akaashi’s room, Bokuto was buzzing. 

“ _Who_ was that?” He exclaimed. 

“Bokuto, calm down.” Kuroo sighed, as Kenma settled himself by his side. 

“I can’t! Did you see him, dude? He’s prettier than Oikawa!”

“Lower your voice, or he’ll come in here and castrate you.” Kenma shushed. 

“Right! But what do you know about him?” Bokuto eagerly pressed. 

“I don’t know, he’d only been here for a few minutes- didn’t really bring much with him actually. Just a duffel bag. He barely talked while he unpacked. Kind of like Shimizu.- A silent beauty.” Kenma replied.

“You mean like yourself?” Kuroo commented, a shit-eating grin on his face. 

“That wasn’t smooth.” 

“Yes but your ears tell me otherwise.” 

Kenma’s hands flew up to cover his ears, his legs, tucking underneath his chin. 

Bokuto faked a gag. “Save your flirting for when I’m not here.” 

“You’re just jealous.” Kuroo quipped at his best friend. 

“This is why I don’t hang out with you guys alone! You two are already dating, Kuroo. I don’t understand why you make me come along and then leave me to third-wheel.” Bokuto finished, his spirits dampening. 

Kenma frowned. He hadn’t meant to make Bokuto feel that way, his mouth opened, but was cut off abruptly. 

“And of course I know you don’t intend to do that! Don’t feel the need to apologize. I’m just a big baby. Sorry.” Bokuto’s voice got progressively softer as he spoke.

“Bo-“ 

Bokuto straightened, painting a look of nonchalance on his face. “I’m going to go hit some spikes at the gym. You two have fun!” He stood up right after, waved, exiting the small room, leaving no room for the couple to say anything. 

Bokuto called out to the two setters in the hallway. 

“Hey, hey, hey! Can one of you two toss for me?” Bokuto asked, hoping one of them would comply. He really needed to let off some steam. 

“I can-“ Oikawa was cut off by Sugawara. 

“Absolutely not, Tooru.” His voice was oddly sweet. 

Oikawa whined. “Aww, but Kou-chan why?” 

“Don’t think I haven’t noticed you wincing! I promised Iwaizumi I would look after you and I will.” 

Oikawa scowled. “I haven’t been wincing.”

“Don’t test me, Tooru.” Sugawara’s voice was still sickly sweet, Oikawa grimaced at the sound of it.

“I’m going with you to have it checked tomorrow.” Oikawa didn’t dare say anything. 

Bokuto let out a low whistle. 

Sugawara gave a look to Bokuto. “I can set for you. I may not be as good as Oikawa, but you said one of us right?” 

“Would you mind?” Bokuto sounded sheepish. 

“Of course not. Let me grab my things.” Suga entered his and Oikawa’s dorm, the latter still pouting. 

“I need to get changed too, I’ll be right back.” 

Bokuto hurriedly went and got changed, exiting his room with his trademark kneepads a few minutes later. “Let’s go!”

\---- 

Wandering around my himself, Akaashi felt his phone vibrate in the pocket of his jeans.

Swiping the screen, he answered. 

“Keiji! Oh thank-goodness! I thought something had happened to you!” His mother’s worried voice echoed over his cellphone. 

“Sorry I didn’t get to call, mom. I’m fine. Just having a look around campus.” 

“Really? How is it! How’s your roommate?” 

“He’s not much of a talker either.” 

“Keiji… please don’t tell me you’re alone right now.” 

Akaashi kept silent. 

“Akaashi Keiji! You told me you wouldn’t be exploring by yourself. I’ll bet you’ve also been taking the stairs!” 

Akaashi let out a little laugh. 

“Oh, for the love of Gods!” 

“I’ll be fine, mom.” 

“Like hell you will! Why haven’t you had someone accompany you?”

“I can’t just tell someone ‘Hey. I might just die any time, would you accompany me to prevent that from happening?’” 

“Oh, Keiji- dear. You have me so worried!” 

“Mom, please don’t cry.” Akaashi deadpanned. 

“I can’t help it!” Sniffling could be heard from the other side of the line.

Akaashi was at his wits end. He sighed. “Alright mom, I’ll try my best to find some friends. Please stop crying.”

“Promise me, okay?” 

“I can’t make any promises.” 

“I’m going to have a heart attack right here while on this phone! You hear me?” 

Akaashi laughed. “I love you, mom. I’ll talk to you again soon.” 

He heard his mother sigh. “Please take care of yourself, sweetie. I love you so much.” 

Akaashi allowed himself to smile. “Tell dad and Yoichi I said hello.” 

“Will do! Speaking of Yoichi, wait for your brother to call, okay?” 

He pulled his hand away from his ear, ending the call, and sighed into the air. 

Attachments took so much effort, and they were exhausting. Not to mention that everyone there had seemed to be friends already. He wondered if he had much time left. There were times when Akaashi couldn’t even speak without stuttering.

But it’s not like he wanted to do anything revolutionary anyway, so it didn’t really matter. And there was no one he would likely be worried about leaving behind- except for his mother, but she had his dad and Akaashi’s younger brother to take care of her. No one else would miss him. 

He didn’t get why his family was so insistent on keeping him alive. 

It was kind of frustrating, how no one wanted to talk about his death. No one. Not his dad, his mom, his brother- or even his friends.

He got that it was a tough topic, but It wasn’t like _they_ were the ones dying were they? 

Truthfully speaking, he kind of wished that it was all done and over with.

His family was pretty wealthy, but still. Akaashi knew they could be using the thousands of money on something better- something that wasn’t perishable like he was. What a waste. 

He knew he was being awfully negative, but he was just stating the facts. 

Akaashi was always a practical person. He never liked sugar-coating things or dancing around topics. People mistook his straightforwardness for coarseness, but it was just him being brutally honest. He never had any intent to come off rude.

He wasn’t lonely. He didn’t need anyone, and no one needed him. It was that simple.

\---- 

The ball slammed down loudly on the other side of the court.

Glancing at the former vice-captain, Sugawara was steadily sweating, and he was beginning to feel the strain on his shoulders. 

Boktuto had barely broken into a sweat, his breathing normal as he waited expectantly for another toss. 

“Can we take a break? I don’t understand how you aren’t tired.” Sugawara pitched. 

“That’s Bokuto’s advantage, Kou-chan! His monstrous stamina.” Oikawa sighed. “You know who else has a monstrous stamina? Iwa-chan. One time, we were at it ‘til the morning-“ 

“Gross, Oikawa. I don’t wanna hear about your sexcapades.” Bokuto spoke. 

“I just realized that you’re the only one without a significant other in our friend circle. Tragic.” 

“Shut the fuck up, don’t tell me things I already know.” 

“Oh, snappy! It must be really gnawing at you huh?” 

“You’re such a dick.”

Oikawa smiled at being able to successfully rile his friend up. 

“I came here to try and forget about that. Everyone is constantly flirting around me and it makes me nauseous.” Bokuto huffed. 

Sugawara smiled in pity at his friend. “You’ll find someone, Bokuto. Just wait for them, okay? Don’t you dare think for a second that you won’t. You’re an amazing person, how can someone not love you?” 

“You know what? I think Aka-chan, the new addition? He’s pretty interesting don’t you think?” Oikawa said, sharing a knowing look with Sugawara. 

That seemed to pique the owl-like man’s interest. “We haven’t really talked, but he’s really pretty.” 

Oikawa frowned, just as Sugawara agreed with Bokuto. 

“Like, really pretty. His hair looks so soft! And his eyes are so nice! They’re like, green? I think. Oh boy. I wonder what he’s learning!” 

“He doesn’t seem like much of a talker. It adds to the mysterious vibe he has going for him.”

“It’s so convenient because Kenma is Kuroo’s boyfriend and that means he’ll go there a lot because Kenma can never be bothered to actually leave his room!” Bokuto stated. 

“That gives you the perfect excuse to be there all the time.” Sugawara encourages. 

“I agree. You should totally go for it, Bokuto.” Oikawa adds.

Bokuto was bouncing. “Okay, I really need to his some spikes right now, I’m getting way too excited.”

\---- 

Akaashi figured he would pick up some supplies at the place near the engineering building. The place was huge.

He pushed open the door to the store, and was surprised when there was actually quite a bit of people. 

He headed straight for the sketchbooks, green eyes scanning over the different kinds. He chose a random one, with the paper not too thick and not too thin- the color a muted yellow. –(why yellow, Akaashi had no idea.) 

He got a set of varying grey-toned markers, as well as some liner pens in different sizes. 

He liked numbers. They were predictable. You’d memorize a formula and know what answer you’re supposed to get. _Math made sense._

Well, to him anyway.- So when his mom told him that he could pick a course, he chose Engineering. He also had an interest in drawing, so it worked out for him. 

He headed for the counter and pulled out a few bills to pay. He uttered a thank you before grabbing his purchases and exiting the store. 

Akaashi had run out of ideas on places to explore. However, there was one place he hadn’t been to.

The gym. 

There was no harm in checking out their volleyball team, right?

In a span of a few short minutes, the ex-volleyball player finally arrived at the gym. 

He was just in time to see Bokuto land a straight, wincing when he heard the ball come into contact with the floor. 

He heard Bokuto emit a ‘hoot’, crouching down on one knee dramatically with his fist pumped by his side. “I’m so great! Did you see, Suga? I’d like to see Kuroo block that!” 

Akaashi had only seen him do one thing, but there was something about the way that he carried himself and the air around him that motivated you. 

Bokuto was probably the complete opposite of Akaashi. 

Akaashi was bland and boring and his overly-practical way of thinking usually leads to him ruining the fun for everyone. 

-And as he watched Bokuto played volleyball, he realized how much he really missed it. 

He missed the feeling of satisfaction that he got whenever his team earned a point. He took pride in his role as a setter, because a point meant that he did his job correctly.- This was probably the only time that his critical thinking did him any good. 

This was the only time he truly felt angry at his disease. Something that he had begun to love, had been ripped out of his hands in an instant. 

He frowned. He’d thought that he’d stowed those feelings away a long time ago. 

Akaashi turned away from the gym, deciding to head back to the dorms, when Oikawa called out to him. 

“Ah, Aka-chan! I see you’ve taken an interest in volleyball?”

He turned around, face neutral. “Just passing-by, Oikawa-san.” 

“You’ve been standing there for 5 minutes, I should assume.” 

“Akaashi! Do you play volleyball too? What position?” Bokuto inquired. 

“I used to play setter, Bokuto-san.” 

“Used to? What happened?” 

The question itself was innocent enough. There was no sense of malice whatsoever, yet hearing it left a heavy weight in his stomach. 

“It just didn’t seem very interesting, suddenly.” That was a lie.

“Maybe that’s because you sucked!” He laughed.

Akaashi didn’t understand why he was laughing. He found it rude, however he seemed to have no intention of coming across that way, and Akaashi let it slide. 

After all, he knew that all too well. 

“I’m sorry?”

“I met this guy back in training camp like, a year and a half ago? His name’s Tsukishima. Funnily enough, he said the same thing you did. You haven’t had _the_ moment yet, haven’t you?” 

“I don’t quite understand.” 

“You know, the moment, that gets you hooked on volleyball? The feeling of satisfaction after scoring a point and taking the wall down right in front of you- crushing them, and being able to show 120% of your strength? That one?” Wide gestures accompanied his exuberant voice. 

He got that feeling of satisfaction, yes, and he was extremely upset when he found out he would be unable to play. But somehow, he got the feeling that whatever it was Bokuto was talking about, hadn’t happened for him in that time. 

“I suppose I haven’t.” 

“Why don’t you try out? Maybe that moment will exist for you here.” Oikawa suggested. 

“I’m not sure it will Oikawa-san.” Akaashi replied curtly. 

“You’ll never know unless you try.” Sugawara protested.

“No thank you.” 

Akaashi pushed himself off of the doorframe he had been leaning on, and angled his body away. 

“Will you toss to me?” 

Akaashi stopped, tilting his head to the side. “Some other time, Bokuto-san.” 

“That wasn’t a no!” Bokuto yelled after him. 

Akaashi shook his head, a small smile gracing his mouth, and headed in the direction of the dorms.

\---- 

For the most part, Akaashi’s seizures were the kinds that weren’t noticeable. It was the kind where he would space out, and the next thing he’d know, a few minutes had passed- which he was thankful for.

That didn’t necessarily mean that it was good, but he hadn’t attracted much attention so far, which was better. 

His body would start to fail him, sooner or later. 

He let out a sigh, pressing the back of his wrist to one of his eyes. 

It was his second day of classes, and so far he’d installed at least 5 different programs onto his laptop. 

Well, I mean- his major is Computer Sciences. 

He tapped his fingers impatiently on the wood of his desk, deciding that the wifi at one of the nearby coffee shops would probably have his latest program installed faster.

Pausing the download, he grabbed his messenger bag and placed it inside, zipping it closed and heading out the door. 

In the hallway, he saw Kuroo, Bokuto, and surprisingly enough- Kenma. 

He hadn’t known the blonde for too long, but he learnt that he never really liked going out, save for when it was Kuroo.

“Hey, hey, hey Akaashi! Where you headed?” Bokuto greeted. 

“Hello, Bokuto-san. I see you’re as enthusiastic as ever. I’m just going to a coffee shop, their wifi will probably be faster there when everyone isn’t trying to download _something._ ”

“You’re probably not the only one with that idea. Good luck.” Kuroo remarked, his grin ever-present. 

“Well, at the very least- it’ll be faster than here.” 

“We were actually going to go get coffee just now! Why don’t you come with us?” 

He glanced at Bokuto’s companions. 

“I wouldn’t want to intrude.” 

“It’s fine.” Kenma answered.

“Well, actually-“ Kuroo stopped short when Kenma elbowed him roughly in the side. 

“Let’s go!” 

The three talked as they went, and Bokuto asked him some questions that really only required short answers.

 _Don’t get attached._ Akaashi chided himself, and continued walking with them. 

The four of them walked a good distance away from campus before arriving at the coffee shop called Nekomata’s. 

The inside had a cozy feel to it, the lighting not too bright but not too dim, the walls lined with framed artworks probably signed by the university students from the art department. 

“Bo and I will go and order, why don’t you and Akaashi find a seat?” Kuroo says, pulling on Bokuto’s arm. 

“Please don’t order anything for me, Bokuto-san. I’m not too fond of coffee.” 

“Tea, then?” The older suggested. 

Akaashi shook his head no, offering a small smile- before looking for Kenma, whom he realized had found his way to a booth next to the window. 

Akaashi took out his laptop, connected to the wifi, and was relieved to see that the wifi here, was indeed faster. 

He peered at the blonde sitting across from him, surprised to find that the other’s own golden eyes were already on him, then they weren’t. 

Somehow, he got the feeling. “I apologize, Kenma-san. I’m not very good at talking. I’m probably coming off really rude, but I don’t mean to. I didn’t have many friends back home.” 

Kenma’s eyes widened in surprise, opening his mouth to say something, but the next thing he knew, someone else was sliding in to the space next to him and placing things on the table. 

“Here you go.” Kuroo said, placing a plate of apple pie in front of his boyfriend, sipping his drink while he was at it. 

“Finally, we get to talk! Everyone’s been pretty curious about you.”

Akaashi doesn’t miss the look he exchanges with Bokuto, who was noticeably more quiet than any other time he’d seen him.

“There’s not much to say.” 

“Sure there is! Like, what course are you taking?” 

“Computer Sciences.” 

“You wanna become an engineer?” Kuroo whistled. “That’s a shit-ton of math.” 

“I like math.” 

Bokuto makes a choked noise beside him, and Akaashi wonders if he’s said something wrong.

“Who the hell likes math?” Kuroo laughs.

Akaashi raises an eyebrow. Like he was one to talk!

“Who the hell likes chemistry so much that they manage to bring it up on at least one occasion daily?” Akaashi didn’t know much, but so far he’s learned that Kuroo was getting a degree in Biochemistry.

Kenma lets out a laugh through his nose, and Kuroo pouts. 

“Chemistry is cool!” 

“I’m sure it is, Kuroo-san. Just like how I think math is cool.” 

Kuroo mutters something underneath his breath, something about people lacking docosahexaenoic acid.

“Anyway, what about you guys?” Akaashi said, checking up on his program again. 

“I got here with my volleyball scholarship! I’m taking up Architecture.” Bokuto answered. 

“Game design.” Kenma added quietly. 

“That’s cool. And a scholarship, huh Bokuto-san? That’s impressive.” Akaashi says, honestly. 

Instantly, a blush blooms across Bokuto’s face. “I-I know right! I’m pretty awesome!” 

“Extraordinary.” Akaashi continues, enjoying the way that Bokuto flushed a shade darker.

Akaashi was smiling- a small quirk of the lips, but it was definitely there. Bokuto wanted to scream.

He’d also managed to find out that Bokuto needed constant attention and encouraging from his fellow peers, none of which seemed to mind. 

It was interesting how, just like Bokuto could pull them, they pull him. 

Again, Akaashi looks around the shop, his eyes catching on the piano. 

Everyone seemed to be chatting around, they wouldn’t mind if he played, right? Just another thing to add onto the background. 

“Please excuse me, Bokuto-san.” He says, and Bokuto swings his legs out of the booth so that Akaashi could pass. 

Bokuto most definitely does not stare, when Akaashi’s hips come dangerously close to his face.

Akaashi goes to the counter. 

“Hello, do you mind if I play your piano for a while?” He asked the manager. 

“Be our guest.” He shrugs, before continuing to serve more drinks. 

Akaashi stalks over to the piano, pulling out the stool and sitting down, pushing the lid to the keys open. 

His eyes glided over the familiar set of rectangles arranged in front of him. 

He hadn’t played in a while, but learning an instrument was kind of impossible to forget. 

He decided on a piece he was sure everyone would know well, however, would surprise them. 

He started the intro, and heard Kuroo laugh from their seat. [ “Twinkle Twinkle Little Star? Really? A 5 year old could play that.” ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hhv-z9wUHyI)

Bokuto hushes him harshly, eyes wide and trained on the raven.

Akaashi resisted the urge to roll his eyes. That’s what everyone says in the beginning. Sure, a five year old could play it, but he doubted they could play it like he does.

And Kuroo does shush, and continues to wash, a smirk on his face. 

Bokuto probably shouldn’t be so amazed at something like twinkle twinkle, but given that he couldn’t play any instrument for shit- he’s wowed already. 

Akaashi’s hands press into the keys easily, the sound flowing around him.

Then, he started to build up on the melody, adding a few more chords- beginning to sound more complex. 

He let muscle-memory carry him along the tune as he let himself drift to his thoughts once more. 

Piano was something he’d learnt at an early age, the movements and alignments engraved into his head. He stopped playing after he had his seizure at school. But before that, he’d managed to compose a few pieces. 

Maybe he’d compose a few more before his dies.-Rather, before his hands start to shake too much. 

Tuning back into the music, he realized he was at the mid-point of the song, his hands never faltering. 

It would be his speaking abilities that would fail him first, followed by his hands, then the rest of his body. 

He finished up the song, the people in the shop offering an applause. 

Akaashi blinked confusedly, forgetting that there were people watching, before he bowed his head thankfully.

He slid the strip of felt back over the keys, gently closing the lid, tucking the stool back and walking back to the booth. 

Kuroo was blinking, his face blank, and Bokuto was back, chattering loudly. 

Kenma hid a smile behind his hair at his boyfriend’s expression. 

Akaashi checked on the program. It was done downloading. He shut his laptop. 

_“What_ was that?” Bokuto questioned, his eyes bright. 

The way he was looking at Akaashi made the back of his neck flush. Why was he looking at him as if Akaashi had just crafted the entire universe? 

“Twinkle Twinkle Little Star.In twelve variations by Mozart. A five-year old could play it.” Akaashi answered, his voice light. 

He placed his laptop back in his bag, ignoring Kuroo’s scowl. 

“Dude, Akaashi just dragged you twice now.” Bokuto cackled.

“Shut up.” Kuroo ground out, obviously not used to having someone else get the last word. 

“It was great hanging out with you all, but I’ll be taking my leave now. Thank you.” Akaashi bid, sliding out of the booth once more. 

“Akaashi!” Bokuto yelled, but he didn’t turn back. 

He couldn’t do that to them. He couldn’t make them watch as he became a hollow shell of what he used to be. It wouldn’t be fair. 

Checking his watch, he had 3 more hours until his afternoon classes, so he decided to make himself lunch. 

Yes, _make_ because he had a specific diet he needed to follow if he wanted to last longer. 

It was a high-fat, low carb, protein diet, with a measure amount of protein intake. 

Over the last few years, he’s learned about 10 different ways he could cook chicken and fish; plus a dozen or more different kinds of salads. Red-meat was kind of sacred to him, since he was only allowed to eat it every once in a while.

It was kind of bland, only having chicken and fish to switch between, but he’d found ways to make his limited options of food, good.

He dropped by the convenience store to get some ingredients, and went back to the dorms so that he could use their kitchen.

He climbed the 2 flights of stairs, arriving at his floor, and went to the shared kitchen on the floor. 

There, he was greeted by an Oikawa, and a rather buff-looking man- his skin tan, his hair sticking up, resembling that of a porcupine. 

Why did everyone have such odd hairstyles? 

They seemed to be bickering, but Oikawa’s eyes held something akin to that of adoration. It was that, and how Oikawa’s legs were propped up on the mystery guys’ legs, and how he tenderly inspected Oikawa’s knee, that let him know that this was most-likely his boyfriend. 

The raven started laying out his purchases along the counter, then opened the stove, proceeding to place the pan on it.

“Ah! Aka-chan!” 

Akaashi didn’t look up. “Hello, Oikawa-san.” He was chopping the vegetables now. 

“What’re you cooking?”

“Chicken,”

He glanced at the couple, and thought to himself, It’s not like he couldn’t go out and buy more food right? He couldn’t finish all the chicken by himself anyway.

“Have you both eaten yet?” 

“No, actually! Iwa-chan here doesn’t wanna take me out for lunch.” 

“Shut up, ‘Kawa. You need to rest your knee first.” The guy- Iwa-chan, bit back. 

“It’s honestly fine, Iwa-chan!”

“No it isn’t!” 

“Yes, it is! I’m hungry.” Oikawa pouted. 

“Just let me take care of you, damn it! I’m barely going to be able to see you once classes actually get rolling. Don’t you dare complain.” 

“Iwa-chan,” Oikawa’s voice faltered, and a sniffle could be heard. 

“Oh my god, why are you crying?!” 

Akaashi snorted under his breath, Oikawa was such a brat, yet there was something oddly endearing about it. 

He tuned them out as he cooked, letting it become background noise. 

He placed the chicken in the pan, which he spiced with olive oil, basil, and garlic-salt. There was some instant rice stored in the cabinets, so he popped them in the microwave for Oikawa and Iwaizumi. 

His low-carb diet meant that he wasn’t allowed to eat rice. Which he was still annoyed about. He really missed rice. 

He continued on with the salad, placing the greens and tomatoes in the bowl. 

Checking on the chicken, he flipped it when he saw that the sides were turning a nicely-colored brown. 

He finished up the food after a few minutes. Preparing three plates, and rationed the food he’d prepared. 

He left one plate on the counter, and placed the ones he was holding in front of Oikawa and Iwaizumi. 

The couple looked up confusedly.

Akaashi looked them both in the eye. “You said you hadn’t eaten yet. Please, enjoy the meal.” He went back to the counter and grabbed his own plate, exiting the room. 

“Thank you, Aka-chan!” Oikawa said, and yet- Akaashi still didn’t look back. 

 

When Akaashi was a safe-distance away, Iwaizumi looked at the food, while in fact- it did smell good, he looked at it thoughtfully. 

 

Oikawa wasted no time in stuffing a piece of chicken into his mouth, his eyes nearly watering at how good it was. 

“Oikawa, do you know if he eats like this regularly?” 

“Waf do you mean ifa-chan?” Oikawa bit out. 

“I mean, what college student actually prepares their food? And why is it so damn healthy?” 

This time, Oikawa swallowed before replying. “It’s healthy, yeah but it doesn’t taste like shit! Try some, Iwa-chan!” 

Iwaizumi shrugged, digging into his food. 

It was _really_ good. 

Meanwhile, in Akaashi’s room, Kenma still hadn’t been back yet, so Akaashi ate on his desk, pushing it off to one side once he was done. 

Akaashi looked up when he heard the familiar sound of the pin being entered into the door lock. 

Kenma shut the door behind him, then proceeded to flop down on his bed, sighing into the covers. He said something, but it was muffled. 

“Sorry, what was that?” 

Kenma propped his head up with his hand. “I hate going out. There’s too many people.” 

Akaashi merely nodded, humming. Maybe he should stop acknowledging them?

But Akaashi wasn’t an asshole. He wasn’t just going to outright ignore them, it just wouldn’t sit well with him. 

If ever, he’d decline their offers to go out. 

Akaashi nodded to himself. Yeah, that could work. 

 

 

Kenma looked at Akaashi thoughtfully, and wondered why there was something so interesting about him. Oikawa had been right when he told Bokuto that Akaashi had that mysterious aura going for him.

He thought of all his friends- and if you’d asked him a few years back he probably would have let out a laugh in the quiet way that he does and walk away, because Kenma, have friends? –He didn’t have friends, he had _a_ friend. Singular. It was only ever Kuroo.

As cheesy as it sounded, Kuroo alone was enough.

Yet somewhere along the way he found himself caring for the people that he came along to meet through volleyball. 

Oikawa was the friend that would be ready to fight anyone if they ever hurt his friends. Despite his naturally outgoing and carefree personality, he was downright _terrifying_ when angry. Kenma found, that he was extremely loyal, and would probably donate a kidney if you asked him to. 

Kuroo would be the person to make you feel better after a bad day, and always knew just what exactly it was that you needed. It always amazed Kenma how he was able to adapt to just about anyone. He was so smart, and always did what was best for everyone. 

And Bokuto was just this giant ball of happiness, that although maybe unnecessarily loud and kind of annoying at first, would find a way to grow on you, somehow. Honestly, Bokuto made Kenma feel better on numerous occasions, and was painfully earnest. He had a heart of gold. –He reminded Kenma of Hinata in Miyagi. 

These three people had come to become an important pieces in Kenma’s life, and he would always be grateful for them. And he’d found, that it was nice having company. 

Kenma wondered, briefly, if Akaash was lonely. 

 

Bokuto was in his room, thinking of things along the lines of Kenma. Why did he get the feeling that Akaashi was sad? 

“Bo, if you think too hard, you might hurt yourself.” 

“Kuroo, what do you think of Akaashi?” Bokuto brushes off the remark. 

“He’s kind of snarky. I don’t like it.” 

“You’re just annoyed that you can’t seem to crack him. Him and Tsukki would get along well, don’t you think?” 

Kuroo glares at him. 

“You don’t like him because he can actually come up with replies for your dumb taunts.” 

“My taunts aren’t dumb when it comes to the court, are they?” Referring to when they play against one another. 

Bokuto pouts. “Whatever. But like, anyway, he seems kind of…” he can’t find the right word for it, so he tries to imitate what he would look like whenever he didn’t feel good.

Kuroo laughs at his friend. Bokuto was still, really a child. “Withdrawn?” 

“Yeah! Whatever that means, but it sounds sad.” 

“I mean, he doesn’t like talking to people. Kinda like Kenma.” 

“No but, like- It’s like he’s forcing himself to do it?” 

“What do you mean?” 

“Well, like earlier- when he played at the shop, he seemed like he had a lot on his mind? And he cooked for Oikawa and Iwaizumi, but they didn’t ask him to. It’s like, he does nice things without intending to, but how come he’s so… I don’t know, like he wants to seem…” 

“Like a dick?” 

Bokuto shoots him a nasty look. “Well, that’s one way to put it. But I feel like he just does that so people won’t talk to him. 

“Like Tsukki?” 

“No, Tsukki is generally a rude person, that’s something you have to grow accustomed to if you wanna be his friend, but…” Bokuto threw his hands up in exasperation. “Ugh! What am I even talking about.” 

“I’ve never seen you have such a hard time getting an idea across. You’re usually very articulate.” He carefully observes his friend. 

“I hate it when you look at me like that.” 

“Like what? I’m just looking at you.” 

“I feel like I’ve been stripped of all my secrets.”

“Bo, you can hardly ever keep your thoughts to yourself. How do you suppose you can keep a secret?” 

Bokuto shrugged, still thinking. “Well, I don’t know, maybe I’m just overthinking it, but I’m asking him out anyway.”

Kuroo rolled his eyes. “Of course you are.” 

_I’m going to solve the puzzle that you are._ Was all Bokuto thought for the rest of the night.

\---- 

It was a finally Friday.

Akaashi was in the library watching one of the matches he’d missed before, and was surprised to see familiar faces on his laptop screen, aside from Oikawa. 

_Of course. The 3 of them are on the national team._ Akaashi blinked, slightly astonished, as to how he didn’t recognize Bokuto and Kuroo. 

Akaashi found, that Bokuto’s presence was even more demanding when it was an actual game. 

All three of them actually, were quite impressive. He wondered how they could manage to balance schoolwork on top of volleyball on a national level. 

So far this week, he’d managed to avoid most contact with the people on his floor by staying in the library. A small corner parallel to the counter, just in case he has a seizure, but not someone could view upon entering. 

By the grace of God, no one has tried to approach him. 

If he ever needed to work in his room, he’d place his headphones on, however he wouldn’t play any music. It was just for the effect. 

He’s also familiarized himself with the staff, particularly Akemi-san at the counter, a charming middle-aged lady that kept him company whenever she wasn’t busy assisting students. 

Ever since she had accompanied Akaashi to look for a book the other day, -it was on the farthest end of the library- he had felt the telltale signs of a seizure. With no one else around, he had calmly interrupted her, speaking quickly, yet clearly. “Pardon me for interrupting, Akemi-san. But I think I might have a seizure in the next few moments, there’s no need to fret- It’s normal. Listen very carefully.” He stepped forward, and gripped her shaking hands. 

“I believe you can do so.” He paused slightly, his vision blurring at the edges. “First, turn me onto my side, and please stay with me throughout the whole thing. Don’t scream for help, not yet, at least- we wouldn’t want to disturb the other students.” He gave a small laugh through his nose, voice levelled. “Only call for help when my seizure has lasted more than five minutes. I apologize for the inconvenience.” 

He didn’t need to tell her to loosen his clothes, given that most of his shirts were oversized, specifically for this reason.

Within the next few seconds, Akaashi sprawled across the floor. 

The small old lady let out a hushed “Oh, dear!” And gently guided the raven onto his side. She looked at her watch and counted, glancing at Akaashi every so often.

After 3 minutes, Akaashi halted in his spasms- Akemi letting out a sigh of relief. 

She waited a few more seconds before laying him on his back once more, propping his head up on her lap. She patted his face lightly, and the younger’s eyes fluttered open tiredly. 

“You did a great job, Akemi-san.” He croaked, giving a smile that would charm anyone. 

 

Now, fast forward back to the present, Akaashi craned his neck slightly to the side, jumping when he felt someone looking over his shoulder.  
It was none-other than Kuroo. 

He had his signature shit-eating grin on his face, glasses perched on the tip of his nose. “Sorry, didn’t mean to scare you. Having fun there?” 

Akaashi turned back towards his screen, choosing to ignore him, hoping that he would go away. 

Unfortunately, it was the opposite. 

Kuroo pulled out the chair across from him, and Akaashi refrained from twisting his face up in annoyance. 

“What are you doing, Kuroo-san.” 

“Sitting? What’s it look like I’m doing?” 

“Please leave.” 

Kuroo made no effort to move. 

Akaashi’s expression was neutral as he shut his laptop closed and place all his handouts in his backpack. If Kuroo wasn’t going to leave, then he would. 

“Woah, where are you going?” 

“I’m taking my leave, Kuroo-san, what’s it look like I’m doing?” 

Kuroo clicked his tongue in annoyance. “Why are you such a prick?” 

Akaashi stilled, looking at Kuroo dead in the eye, gripping the straps of his bag tightly. _“Because it keeps people away.”_ He grit out, pushing his chair backwards and moving towards the exit. 

He gave a little wave to Akemi, leaving Kuroo behind. 

Honestly, some people just couldn’t get a clue. 

 

Akaashi finally arrived at the dorm, punching in the code and entering the small room. 

Kenma was there, papers surrounding him on his bed, and for the first time, he didn’t raise his head in acknowledgement at him. 

Kuroo probably told on him. 

Finally, Akaashi thought. Finally, people would leave him alone. 

He threw his bag on the bed, flopping down on his back. He pulled out his phone and his earphones, connecting the two, but like the usual- not really playing music. He closed his eyes, hearing the occasional sound of paper being shifted. 

Kenma had been muttering the same thing for a good few minutes, before Akaashi finally gave in. He pulled out one earbud.

“It’s 30.” Akaashi said aloud, not bothering to look at the blonde. 

“What?” 

“The answer to the derivative you’ve been trying to solve. It’s 30.”

“I’ve been on this problem for nearly half an hour now.” 

Akaashi shrugs. 

Kenma finally looks over, eyes widening when he sees that Akaashi wasn’t holding anything. 

“Did you just solve a _derivative_ in your head?” Kenma asked, incredulous. 

Akaashi didn’t bother with a reply, continuing to blankly stare at the off-white ceiling. 

Kenma brings out his phone, and texts his boyfriend. 

**to: kuro  
can you solve a derivative for me**

**from: kuro  
sure, kitten**

Kenma quickly types in the set of numbers, and set his phone off to the side to move onto another question, knowing that his boyfriend would take a little while. 

He answered some of the easier questions, and his phone dinged with a notification. 

**from: kuro  
I got 30. I double-checked with Yaku.**

Yaku was his old team captain, who was currently studying to be an accountant. He accidentally chose calculus as one of his electives, and he was stuck with it.

 **to: kuro  
and you used a calculator for that, right? **

**from: kuro  
Of course I did- are you high? **

Kenma blinked. –Akaashi inwardly gave himself a pat on the back. 

 

 

The next day, Akaashi woke up, and found that there were two other people in his dorm room. 

He turned away from where he was facing his wall, and sat up abruptly. 

“See, I told you, you’d wake him up.” Kenma warns. 

“Sorry, Akaashi- were we too loud!?” Bokuto asks, his voice far too loud. 

Akaashi slowly turns his head to the side, not at all caring is he looked like a mess. His eyes are sharp, his face twisted into a scowl. 

“Bokuto-san,” He pointedly doesn’t mention Kuroo. _”What_ are you doing in the dorm-“ He checks his wrist, because Keiji never takes off his watch, “At _7 AM_ , on a Saturday?” 

Bokuto winces. “I take it you aren’t much of a morning person?” 

Akaashi’s glare doesn’t soften. In fact- he glares even harder. 

“Jeez, can you chill? Bokuto just needs help with his math homework. He has class in an hour.” Kuroo supplies.

Akaashi’s eye twitches, and he stands up, walks over to the bed, and gestures for Kenma to hand him the workbook. 

He does a onceover of the page. “Is this all?” 

“There’s like, 2 more pages.” Bokuto answers, his voice small, eyes wide. 

Akaashi glances up, raises an eyebrow, and grabs the nearest pen he could find.

He checks the other pages. He could probably answer it in 10 minutes or so. “What are you doing?” Kuroo asks, sounding very annoyed. 

“Listen here, pain-in-the-ass Kuroo-san. I stayed up very late to work on a blueprint last night. I’ve probably gotten, about 4 hours of sleep so far. Today is Saturday. I don’t have classes. Kindly shut up so I can finish Bokuto-san’s homework and go back to sleep.” 

Kuroo is about to make another retort before Kenma tugs at his sleeve, shaking his head _no._

10 minutes passed by in a painfully awkward silence, which Akaashi did not mind, only focusing on writing the answers to the problems. 

He slammed the workbook shut with the pen inside, and drops it on the bed.

Afterwards, he goes back to his bed, crawls under the covers, faces away, and goes to sleep again. 

“He just finished all my math homework in 10 minutes! He’s like, a supercomputer!” Bokuto says, and in return gets a _“Bokuto-san,”_ from Akaashi, who’s just about this close to defenestrating them. 

“Right! Sorry, let’s go Kuroo.”

“Dude, the whole reason why we came here is so that you could actually understand the topic.” 

Akaashi sighs and sits up, eyes half-closed. “If you exit the room in the next 5 seconds, you can come back later and I’ll explain it to you. So please leave, I’d very much like to sleep.” 

Bokuto right about dashes out of there and is gone before Akaashi can hit the pillows. 

Kuroo, of course- takes a little longer. “Sleep is for the weak.” 

“Kindly _fuck off_ Kuroo-san, or you’ll be sure to regret it.” 

That gets the second-year walking a bit quicker. 

Akaashi falls back onto his bed, closes his eyes, then goes to sleep. 

 

“Dude, I told you.” 

“He was completely rude!” 

“Yes, but he still did my math homework, and offered to reteach it later!” 

“He called me pain-in-the-ass Kuroo-san.”

“Well, to be fair dude- you are, really annoying.” 

“I don’t get why he hates me so much.” Kuroo sputters at Bokuto, his dislike towards Akaashi growing each moment that passes. 

And what did he mean, ‘It keeps people away?’ 

“Dude, seriously- lay off. I really don’t like him and I get the feeling he just wants to be left alone.” 

“Oh come on, he’s completely harmless!”

“Are you serious? All we did was wake him up and that experience alone was absolutely _terrifying.”_

“Everyone’s a little cranky in the mornings.” 

Kuroo gapes at his best friend. “ _A little?_ You call that a little? A little is an understatement!” 

Oikawa sees the two on his way to the gym for some practice. 

“Yaho! K-chan, Bo-chan! What are you two so heatedly arguing about?” He approaches them, his smile as bright as ever. 

“Oikawa, please tell Bokuto that mingling with the new guy is a bad idea.” 

“Why not? He seems pretty cool.” Oikawa asks, his head cocking to the side. 

Bokuto lets out a “Ha!” and Kuroo frowns even more. 

“Cool? He’s a complete dick!” 

“I can’t say anything besides he’s a really good cook. I’ve barely talked to him.” 

Kuroo drags his hands down his face in frustration. 

“Hm, maybe I can get a read on him?” 

Oikawa was studying to be a psychologist. Or- rather, a mentalist. He was already pretty manipulative to begin with, but on top of learning even more about how other people think, he was on a whole other level. 

Of course, he’d never use his skills to hurt his friends. 

“That weird thing where you look at them and then catalog all their characteristics? No way. You’d scare him off.” Bokuto protests. 

“But Tetsu-chan here is just worried for you! Let me do it.” 

“Why can’t I just ask him out and find out all about him myself?” 

“Oh, but that’s boring.” Oikawa pouts. 

“I’m not clairvoyant like you are, Tooru.” 

“I’m not clairvoyant either! I just pay attention.” 

“Ugh. Whatever. I’m getting coffee.” 

Bokuto scuttles away, leaving Kuroo behind. 

“What are you so worried about?” 

“I don’t know, but yesterday, I caught him in the library, and he was watching one of our matches right? So I sit in front of him and he gets all mad and leaves, but before he left he said something.” 

A few seconds passed by, and Oikawa juts his head forward. “Well, what did he say?” 

“I don’t know, I asked him why he was such a prick, because he is- and he said, ‘because it keeps people away’, in like- the most passive aggressive tone ever.” 

“Oh?” Oikawa drags out the word, a smile dancing on his mouth. 

“What?” 

“That’s really interesting. It contradicts what he did for me and Hajime the other day.” 

“Look, I don’t even know. But Bokuto said something about wanting to come off mean but then unintentionally doing nice things, If that makes any sense.” 

“It makes perfect sense actually, nothing less from Bokuto- but the question is, _why,_ eh?” 

Kuroo shrugs, and bids Oikawa goodbye, saying that he also needs to catch a class. 

Oikawa makes up multiple scenarios in his head as he walks to the gymnasium, tapping his chin. “I wonder…”

 

Later that afternoon, Bokuto stops by Akaashi and Kenma’s dorm again. 

He was rather surprised to see that Akaashi was still asleep, him on his stomach, sheets a mess- with his limbs sprawled around his body.

“What the heck? He’s still asleep?” He whispers, not so quietly. 

Kenma shrugs. “Yup. He hasn’t woken up once.” 

Akaashi feels something gently prod his cheek. He was already half-awake by this point. Honestly, one of these days he wishes his brain would short-circuit in his sleep and then he wouldn’t have to wake up. A painless death. 

He inhales sharply, pushing himself off the bed to sit back on his knees. He rubs at his eyes sleepily, holding up a finger before he gets off the bed and stumbles his way to the bathroom. 

Kenma feels the back of his neck warm, and Bokuto’s ears are a bright red. 

Even Kenma had to admit that Akaashi could be pretty cute. 

Bokuto sighs dreamily, wondering how it was possible to be that attractive. 

Akaashi comes back, looking more put together, his expression back to it’s usual self. 

He sits on the floor, gesturing for Bokuto to follow- and he does. 

“So,” Akaashi has to stifle another yawn. “What do you need me to teach, Bokuto-san?” 

“Um,” Bokuto scratches the back of his neck. 

Akaashi raises an eyebrow patiently. 

“Everything?” 

Akaashi resists the urge to sigh, and instead furrows his eyebrows. To be fair, he did ask for this. 

“Okay, I guess.” Akaashi says, twisting his body so he could retrieve his laptop from the bed. 

“Okay?”

He opens his laptop and types in his password. 

Bokuto gasps when he sees Akaashi’s desktop. 

_“You like owls?”_

Akaashi glances at Bokuto. “Yes.” 

“That’s so cool! I love owls! They’re where I got inspiration for my hairstyle! I look like a horned-owl, don’t I?”

Akaashi casts a side-long glance as he retrieves his notes, and lets out a hum.

“Okay, let’s start from here.”

Akaashi spends the next few hours teaching Bokuto, having to tell him to focus quite a bit. 

Kenma notes how patient Akaashi is with Bokuto, explaining everything carefully, before he continues on to the next topic. Akaashi was so confusing, because while he could be kind of rude, he contradicts it every time he does something nice. 

By nightfall, Akaashi had managed to teach Bokuto ¾ of the material. 

“Ugh, _Akaaashi,_ can we take a break? I’m really hungry and I think I’ve had enough math for a day.” 

“C’mon, Bokuto-san, just a little bit more, we’re almost done.” 

Bokuto whines. Akaashi rolls his eyes. 

“I got it! Why don’t you go out for dinner with me Akaashi?” 

Akaashi doesn’t think twice when he answers. “No, Bokuto-san.” 

Bokuto visibly deflates beside him. “Why not?” 

“I can’t. I’m sorry.” Was all he said, and he fixed up Bokuto’s worksheets and tucked them neatly in his workbook. 

“Well, um- we’re having this thing tomorrow, if you’re interested. We go to a pub nearby, and like, talk.” 

“I don’t drink.” 

Akaashi seemed adamant on not going. So Bokuto left it at that. 

“Okay. Thanks for today. I really appreciate it. Is it okay if I come by tomorrow so you could finish teaching me?” 

Akaashi nods, then returns back to his computer. He didn’t wave goodbye, because that would mean he was being friendly, but then that wasn’t what he was going for. 

It was kind of tiring, to have to constantly restrain himself, but it was his way of protecting them, he guessed. 

“Why won’t you give him a chance?” Kenma wonders aloud. 

Akaashi glances up, his shoulders tensing. 

“A chance to what?” He pretends like he doesn’t know anything. 

“Don’t be ignorant. Everyone here has tried talking to you for days. We’re all confused. I especially don’t get why you don’t like Kuroo.” 

Akaashi gulps, and bites the inside of his cheek. 

_It’s because I’m scared._

“Unfortunately, Kenma-san. I haven’t got an answer to your question.”

Kenma doesn’t push it. 

 

Bokuto arrives the next day, and Akaashi notices how he isn’t as excitable as the day before. 

He learns what’s left of the material from Akaashi, thanks him, then leaves. 

Akaashi wonders why it unsettles him. 

The thought plagues him even as he situates himself in his usual seat at the library. 

He sees Oikawa in the doorway a few minutes later, and he ducks his head low to try and avoid being seen. 

Unluckily for him Oikawa decides to pull out the chair directly across from him, and then proceeds to situate his arms on top of the table. 

“Oikawa-san, have you ever heard of asking?” 

“But you would have said no!”

“It’s common courtesy.”

“I must be intruding then.” 

“Excuse me, but yes you are.” 

“How straightforward.” 

Akaashi drags his forefingers across his eyebrows, sighing loudly. 

“Please leave, Oikawa-san.” 

“No.” 

“If you don’t, I will.” 

“Ah, but you won’t really do that, will you? I know you have a lot of things to work on, and the library is the most appropriate place for that.” 

“I have a dorm.” 

“Hm, I don’t think Ken-chan would be very happy to see you right now.” 

Akaashi almost falters. “I’m his roommate. I stay there either way.” 

“But you didn’t say you didn’t care.” Oikawa smirks across him. 

Akaashi furrows his eyebrows. “Are you trying to manipulate me? I can guarantee you It’s not very effective.” 

“That’s interesting considering you haven’t made one move to stand. You did differently for Kuroo.” 

Akaashi stills. His mind working. “Something tells me you aren't quite as carefree as everyone thinks you are.

“Perceptive.” Oikawa says. 

“You’re also very, very conscious of your surroundings. Everything you do is so stiff. Like you’re aware others are watching. Which leads you to nit-pick on every single thing you do.” The older continues.

“I beg to disagree. I could care less what other people think.” 

“Is that so?” 

Akaashi remains looking unimpressed.

“You’re fiddling with your hands under the table. Do I make you nervous?” 

“No.” Akaashi immediately halts in his actions. He starts shuffling the papers on the table, arranging it into a neat little pile so that he could tuck it back into his bag. 

“Let’s play a game, shall we?” Oikawa proposes.

“Depends. What’s the game?” 

“I just profile you.”

“I haven’t got anything to hide.” Akaashi almost snorts. 

“Everyone has something to hide, Aka-chan!” Oikawa exclaims, his grin holding something troublesome. 

“If I win, will you leave?” 

“Looks like I won’t be leaving then.” 

“You get one try.” 

Akaashi doesn’t doubt that Oikawa can’t describe his entire existence. He just doubts that he can guess- no,- find out, why Akaashi is the way he is. 

“Sheesh, tough crowd.”

“Are you always this modest, Oikawa-san?”

Oikawa lets out a laugh through his nose. 

“Let’s see. The honorifics you seem to tack onto everyone can tell me two things. Either you were raised to be extremely polite, probably because of your parents-they’re successful figures aren’t they? Or, you probably haven’t had many friends to familiarize yourself with. 

Like I said a while ago, your gestures are extremely stiff. Do you happen to have a younger brother? That probably adds on to the fact of why you’re so decisive. You try to set an example for him. 

You’ve never had a significant other, in fact- as far as I can tell you’ve never been interested. 

But, I’m wondering why you don’t have any friends. Rather- you don’t want any. Frankly speaking here Aka-chan, you’re quite a vision- much like myself. Why are you so… cold?”

Akaashi shrugs. “You tell me.” 

Oikawa leans on the back of his chair, crossing his arms. “You know, Aka-chan. I have a kouhai. Tobio-chan never knew what it was like to depend on other people until his first year of high school. He was quite… dominating in his middle school days. Thought everyone was incompetent. He played volleyball.

Then one day, everyone just up and left him. Because of that, he never really tried interacting with other people, you know? I think that experience really affected him. Left him with a case of azathagorophobia. 

So, I’m thinking- something similar happened to you as well? Though, you don’t give me the bossy vibe. But people you probably thought you could trust just… disappointed you.

I don’t think It’s your personality that made them leave… something else? But I can’t figure out what. It was in high school so probably…”

Akaashi remained confident that Oikawa wouldn’t be able to take a guess.

“A petty case of rumors? Ugh, but that’s not it is it? You’re an introvert, no one would pay attention to you so why would they make up something about you?

Anyway, my point is, you’re wary of people now are you? Because of something that happened in high school.” 

“That’s correct. I wouldn’t expect any less from you, Oikawa-san. But unless you figure out what happened in high school, I win. Please see yourself out.” 

Oikawa pouts. “Sadly. Well, I’ll leave you to it!”

Before he leaves Akaashi to his own devices, he shoves his hands in his pockets and leans over his own shoulder.

“I’ll figure it out, Aka-chan. Just you wait.” -Then walks away with practiced grace. 

“Hopefully, you’re not too late by then.” Akaashi sighs.


	2. ambivalence

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! I'm a week late on the update, excuse me- but for some reason this chapter felt like it took ages to write. I'm also really unsatisfied with the length- but anyway, tell me what you guys think in the comments below!
> 
> -Basil

You see, with all the medication Akaashi had to take, he was bound to run into trouble with keeping it all down. –Rather, being able to swallow. 

So when he sees Oikawa in the kitchen trying to deep-throat a popsicle after his classes are finished for the day, and failing, he nearly laughs." 

Bokuto and Kuroo were there, both doing the same. Kenma sat in the corner quietly, glancing up every now and then as his fingers flew across the keyboard. 

Oikawa pulls his out after a moment, coughing violently. 

“I don’t get it. This really isn’t working for me.” Oikawa whines. 

Bokuto follows a few moments later, minus the hacking. 

“Well, I don’t really have a gag reflex so I usually just shove it all down in one go. It works.”

“Breathe through your nose.” Kuroo supplies. 

“Ugh. I don’t wanna end up choking and then biting on Iwa-chan like a damn sausage! That’s embarrassing.

Kuroo chokes on laughter, his cackle resounding through the kitchen, and Bokuto nearly falls off his chair. Kenma stops typing.

Akaashi rolls his eyes at their antics, quietly downing the handful of pills in one go with a glass of water. 

“Say, Aka-chan, do you have any useful tips?” 

Akaashi stares at him blankly, recalling their conversation in the library. Oikawa was trying to toy with him. 

“If you’re having trouble with your gag-reflex, I suggest you squeeze your thumb. It might help.” Akaashi says, watching as a look of surprise flits over Oikawa’s face. 

Oikawa shrugs. There was no harm in trying. 

So he puts the popsicle in his mouth, pushing it in gently. Akaashi watches as he clutches his thumb in a fist. 

After a few seconds, Oikawa is able to fit the whole thing successfully in his mouth without gagging. He keeps it there, and once he’s satisfied, pulls it out. 

Akaashi winces at the trail of spit that follows the popsicle. He pushes himself off of the counter he was leaning on. 

“Hopefully Iwaizumi-san will still have his genitals intact the next time I see him.” Akaashi mutters.

Oikawa waves a hand after the raven, knowing Akaashi wouldn’t lean back. “Thanks, Aka-chan!” 

Akaashi shakes his head, not believing that he just gave a tip on deep throating. Even he had to stop and laugh at that. 

Bokuto pouts slightly as Akaashi walks away. 

“So, what’s the deal with him?” Kuroo asks, eager to hear details. 

Oikawa hums, licking the popsicle slowly. “I don’t know.” 

Kenma has to halt typing once more. _“You_ don’t know?” 

Oikawa makes a face. “Yeah? Is it really that much of a surprise?” 

“Yes? Do you remember when Iwaizumi had that date at the start of summer, when you guys weren’t dating yet- and when he introduced him to you, you pretty much ruined the whole thing for him.” Kenma deadpans. 

“Hey! It’s not one of my finest moments, but that guy had a girlfriend, okay? I couldn’t just let Iwa-chan walk into a relationship like that. Plus, I have to thank  
that guy. If it weren’t for him, Iwa-chan and I wouldn’t have fought and got together.” Oikawa says, kicking Kenma’s shin lightly under the table. 

Kenma shrugs, then resumes with his programming. 

“You really didn’t get anything from him?” Kuroo tries.

“Well, I did, but it’s nothing interesting.” Oikawa says, as he finishes the last of his popsicle. 

“Bo-chan, you’re awfully quiet. Is something bothering you?” Oikawa asks- a question he obviously knows the answer to. 

“It’s nothing!” Bokuto says, biting his popsicle and chewing on it. 

“Does it have something to do with Aka-chan?” 

“Of course it does.” Kuroo states, rolling his eyes. 

Bokuto’s shoulders reach up to his ears. 

“Hey, you know, if you really wanna find him, he’s in the library all the time.” Oikawa suggests.

“I object! He’s so...” Kuroo shivers.

“Well, I’m not going to disagree to that, he’s touchy. But he is kinda interesting.” Oikawa says, shrugging. 

“How so?” Kuroo retorts.

“Well, I talked to him in the library right?- And don’t look at me like that,- but anyway, so I played with him for a bit- stop making that face, Kuroo you’re  
annoying,- and he’s wary of people now. Something happened to him in highschool. The people there disappointed him.” 

“I bet nudes!” 

“Shut up, Kuroo.” Bokuto immediately snaps. 

Oikawa raises an eyebrow at Bokuto, who pointedly ignores him. “No. That’s not it. Aka-chan is an introvert. And he’s never had a girlfriend.” 

Bokuto’s frame droops slightly.

“Or a boyfriend.” Oikawa adds.

“He’s never dated? Doubtful.” 

“I said he never dated. Never said that he hasn’t tried fooling around.” Oikawa corrects Kuroo. 

 

 

Akaashi on the other hand, arrives at their dorm just as his phone starts ringing. 

It was a video call from his younger brother. 

He accepts it, and waits for the screen to load as he lays down on his bed.

“Onii-san!” Yoichi greets cheerfully, a smile on his face. 

“Hey, Yoi-chan.” Akaashi greets, with his own smile. 

“How’s college?” 

“It’s been decent so far. Class is tiring but invigorating. What about you?” 

“Let’s see… first of all, I really miss your cooking. And we had to dissect a frog the other day, mind you- I had to do all of it because my partner was a prude. He refused to touch it! Oh! -and I got confessed to the other day! It was flattering but I’m not really looking for that at the moment. Turning her down proved to be extremely awkward.” 

Akaashi laughs at the 15-year old. “I’m not surprised you did.” 

Keiji and Yoichi were exceedingly close. Despite the both of them being complete opposites, Keiji always looked out for his younger brother. As Keiji tried to set an example for the younger, it was the main reason to his poised personality. However, Yoichi was more of an impulsive person, someone that likes to think on his feet, which led him into trouble more often than not. -Probably because as a kid, Keiji encouraged Yoichi to have fun. To take risks. Something Keiji never had the luxury of doing. So as best as he could, Yoichi, as Keiji said, would be having fun for the both of them. 

Keiji needed to learn how to take risks, and Yoichi needed to learn how to take things more seriously. But without a doubt, his older brother was someone he looks up to immensely. 

But Yoichi had picked up a few things from his brother, such as their manner of speaking. -But unlike Keiji, Yoichi sounded much more... should one say, alive? -No pun intended. He was also pretty good at math.

Keiji, in simpler terms was much colder in comparison to his younger brother. 

“I felt so bad! Onii-san, you’ve gotten a few confessions right? How’d you decline it?”

“Well… I don’t think the way I did it would work the same way for you. You have your own charms, Yoichi. I’m sure you’ll figure it out. But I think the one thing I could say to you is be honest.” 

“Ah, always so simple, Onii-san!"

Akaashi shrugs. 

“So, Onii-san, speaking of confessions, have you gotten any yet?” 

“No.” Akaashi couldn’t say he was upset about that, after all, It’s his fault.

“Onii, please don’t tell me that you’ve been keeping to yourself.”

“And what if I am?” 

“Onii-san, you deserve to be happy too, you know? Considering the way life’s cheated you… “

“You’re probably the first person to properly talk about my death.” 

“You’re running out of time to do all the things you wanna do. Make a bucket-list or something.” 

“Me? Make a bucket-list? I’d snap like a toothpick.” Akaashi laughs.

“Geez, what are you thinking? I’m not saying you jump off a building. I’m saying you go play volleyball again, compose a few songs… fall in love.- You know, that sort of thing.” 

“Look, I wanna live my life with as minimal casualties possible. Falling in love sounds like a recipe for disaster.” 

“What are you talking about?” 

“I mean, I don’t want to have to involve more people in my life than necessary. It’s a burden for them, and It’s selfish.” 

“Onii, when will you learn to be selfish? Just this once. You’re in college now. People are different there. You’re always looking out for other people that you forget to take care of yourself. That’s why mom worries for you so much.” 

Yoichi frowns at his older brother, his appearance strikingly similar to Keiji’s own in that instant.

"I’ll think about it.” Akaashi reassures him, in attempt to make him feel better. 

“Listen, I’m not talking to you again until you find at least one friend there. _One._ Don’t hurt yourself.” 

_It’s not a matter of hurting me, It’s a matter of hurting them._ “Yoichi-“ 

“Bye-bye, Onii. Take care of yourself! Better start looking for that friend!” 

Yoichi quickly ends the call, and Keiji is only able to sputter a response before the screen blanks. 

Akaashi sighs. He just really didn’t get what the big deal was. 

 

In the solace of the quiet, Akaashi decides to head to the library, with the hope that he’d be able to clear his head. 

Once he gets there he takes his usual seat and fiddles with his hands. 

Akemi sees the younger boy, and she looks at him, waiting for his nod, before seating herself in the seat across him. 

“Alone again?” 

“Nothing I’m not used to, Akemi-san.”

“Keiji-kun, can I ask you a question?” 

Akaashi nods. 

“How come you refuse to talk to anyone that approaches you, hm?” 

He thinks it over. “You know of my condition, Akemi-san. I haven’t got much time left. It wouldn’t be nice of me to string them along like that.” 

“Have you given them the chance to choose?” 

Akaashi pauses. “What?” 

“Dear, they deserve to choose if they want to stay with you or not. That’s up for them to decide.” 

“I guess so. But I think, I’m afraid.” 

“Of what?” 

Akaashi sighs, training his eyes on the lines of the table. “Back in highschool, I had an episode. During practice. When my friends learned of my condition, they decided that it was a lost cause. Left me in the dust. And I guess, a part of me can’t blame them. I think, I’m afraid that it’ll happen again.-When they find out,”  
Because they were bound to find out at some point, he couldn’t keep it hidden forever, if they were friends. “They’ll leave, and it won’t just be me picking at loose threads. Because in that situation, I set myself, and even them, up for disappointment. I knew something like that was going to happen and I let it be. So, to save myself, as well as them,- the trouble, I choose not to involve myself with others. In the end, the whole ordeal is just too cumbersome.” 

Akaashi finishes with a breath. 

Akemi lets him gather his bearings before she speaks, softly. 

“That’s quite selfless of you Keiji-kun. But don’t you think that, with someone else around, it’ll be easier to carry the weight better? Isn’t it nice to know that there will be people that will miss you?” 

“It’s not nice to know that I’ll be leaving them feeling rather defeated.”

“But this whole thing is so lonely, wouldn’t you agree?” 

“I like the quiet.” 

“But there’s such a thing as _too_ quiet, Keiji-kun.”

She reaches over the table, and takes his hands gripping them gently. “You’re right. You haven’t had much time left. But you aren’t making the most out of it. You’re letting your fear reign on your decisions. -Life is all about taking risks. If there’s one thing I know, regret is never a good feeling. Because having regrets means everything has passed, and there’s nothing left for you to do. You can’t leave your family with ‘what-ifs’. You have to say goodbye to the people you love, with them knowing that you were perfectly content. Or else, they won’t settle. And neither will you.” She finishes, patting Keiji’s head gently before standing up and sauntering away. 

Akaashi is left in a state of ambivalence. 

So, he shoves those thoughts in the dark recesses of his mind, and busies himself with schoolwork. Then for the second time that day, someone sits across from Akaashi. 

He looks up from the sketches he was doing, and sees Bokuto, looking rigid. His eyes were wide and he was chewing hard on his bottom lip, Akaashi was afraid it would fall off. 

Akaashi sets down the piece of parchment paper, and for a moment the two of them stare at one another. 

“Can I help you, Bokuto-san?” 

“Oikawa told me I could find you here!” Bokuto says, with so much fervor that the librarian nearby shushes them harshly, and then gives them a withering look. 

Bokuto utters a not-so-quiet apology, and the other students in the library look over. 

Akaashi winces. “Bokuto-san please keep your voice down.” 

“Right! I can do that.” Bokuto nods, his eyes twinkling. 

Akaashi has to roll his lips to prevent the smile that threatens to overcome his face at Bokuto’s behavior. It was simply so… energetic, so full of life. 

“Listen, I know you said no when I invited you out the other day, but… do you wanna go out for coffee? And like, It’s totally fine if you say no, because no means no, and I promise I’ll stop bothering you if you really want me to,-“

Akaashi isn’t sure what compels him to say, “Sure.” 

Maybe that little talk with Akemi-san had left him to reevaluate himself. 

“Oh, okay that’s totally fine-“ Bokuto stops mid-sentence, his hands suspended mid-air, as he watches Akaashi fix his things.“Did you say yes?” He clarifies. 

Akaashi remains impassive, glancing at him as he stands up. 

The older still doesn’t follow, and Akaashi angles his body sideways. “Are we getting that coffee, or-?” 

Bokuto slides out of his chair rather aggressively, stumbling over his own steps before he stands next to Akaashi. The younger boy resumes in his steps, not looking at Bokuto as they walk. 

“Where would you like to go?” Bokuto asks. 

“You know the place with the piano?”

“Oh! Fukurodani’s? The place we went to last time?” 

“Yeah. There is fine.” 

They’re halfway there when Bokuto freezes. Akaashi looks at him, confused.

“Wait, I just remembered that you don’t really like coffee.” The two-toned hair man says, looking panicked.

“It’s alright, I’ll have milktea, or something.” 

The former lets out a huge sigh of relief. “I almost died.”

“I could see that, Bokuto-san.” 

Bokuto laughs, loud and warm, and Akaashi is awed at the sight that graces him. What a blessing.

“Oh yeah, thanks for your help by the way, ‘Kaashi! I got a pretty good grade in my quiz the other day, much better than the others! Our math teacher is absolute shit at explaining and I always feel real stupid when I ask her questions- but whenever I do, she just tells me to look at the example on the board! Like, the hell am I supposed to do with that? Would I have been asking for your help if I knew what you wrote on that board? And she’s always so… annoyed! Lady, you signed up to deal with annoying teenagers asking you questions, you can’t honestly blame it on your students, and wow! I’m rambling, aren’t I?” Akaashi lets out a little laugh. Quiet, and timid, but it still makes goosebumps litter his body everywhere. “It’s alright, continue.” 

”Are you sure?”

Akaashi gives a curt nod, and Bokuto pushes open the door, gesturing for Akaashi to go first. 

They’re both welcomed by the comforting atmosphere, and they both go to the counter. 

“Oh, Bokuto. What can I get you?- And who’s this?” 

“Konoha, this is Akaashi. Akaashi, meet Konoha, one of my good friends. Hey, Komi! Hi, Sarukui! They weren’t on their shift the other day, which is why you  
didn’t get to meet them.” 

“It’s nice to meet you, Konoha-san.” 

“Just Konoha is fine! It’s nice to meet you too.” 

“Okay, anyway! I’ll get a Caramel Macchiato, iced. How about you, ‘Kaashi?” 

The raven makes a little humming sound, and decides on a green milk-tea. He pats around his pockets, but stops when a loud ‘smack!’ resounds in the air from Bokuto slapping the bills on the counter. 

“Sorry, ‘Kaashi! This ones on me.” He finishes with a charming smile, and Akaashi does a double-take. 

“Bokuto-san, It’s fine-“

“Konoha, quick! Keep the money!” 

Konoha shakes his head at his friend’s actions, smiling as he places the bills in the cash-register. 

“Have a seat, Komi will be out with your drinks in a minute.” 

Akaashi thanks him, and sits down with Bokuto. 

He sets his bag down, and shifts awkwardly in his seat. 

He wonders why he says yes so easily, and then he thinks of Bokuto, and suddenly it clicks in his head. 

Bokuto reminded him of Yoichi. 

He had the same easy-going personality, one that undoubtedly got him into sticky situations, but also came useful when the time calls for it. 

Komi comes with their drinks, and Akaashi graciously accepts his. 

“So, Akaashi! Tell me about yourself.” Bokuto chimes. 

“I’m not quite sure what’s there for me to say, Bokuto-san.” 

“I’ll go first if you’d like!” 

“I think that would be best,” 

“Okay, so…” 

And Bokuto rambles and tells the raven about himself, the latter listening attentively. 

Akaashi learns that Bokuto is an only child, but his parents come from a rather large family. He has a lot of cousins, so when it comes to special occasions and they all gather, the whole thing is quite lively. He learns that Bokuto absolutely loves Yakiniku, and that he eats a hefty amount, which explains why Bokuto’s muscles- he visits the gym regularly- where he finds the time to do so, Akaashi doesn’t know. 

“I think of it this way, I exercise more so I can eat more!” 

Akaashi laughs behind the rim of his cup. 

Bokuto continues, spewing out random trivia, like how he and Kuroo have been best friends since highschool and that they met through numerous training camps. Bokuto boasts about how he used to be part of the top 4 aces in the country, but Akaashi doesn’t mind. He and Oikawa had only met in the previous year, unfortunately. Despite his best efforts, he never made it to nationals with his highschool team, but he was scouted, and now here they both were, playing for the national team. 

Kenma decided he’d quit playing for college, since the only time he’d ever actually get hyped for a game was when they played against Karasuno. But nevertheless, Kenma was an outstanding player, with his calculated attacks that left the other team wondering what hit them- however, Bokuto claims that the pair (Kuroo and Kenma) rarely ever won against Bokuto and his team. 

He finishes, and gestures toward Akaashi. “Your turn!” 

“Well, my highschool life wasn’t quite as effervescent as yours, Bokuto-san. Truly, there’s not much for me to say. I kept to myself for the majority of it. But back home, I have a younger brother. His name’s Yoichi, he’s in his first year of highschool. I enjoy playing the piano and reading….” Akaashi furrows his eyebrows as he’s left speechless. Literally. He doesn’t know what to say. 

Bokuto’s laugh distracts him. “You really have no clue what else to say!” 

Akaashi frowns. “Regrettably, no.” 

“Hey, you mentioned you used to play volleyball right? Why don’t you join us for practice one time?” 

Akaashi raises an eyebrow. “Are you permitted to randomly invite mediocre players to your team practices?” 

Bokuto bristles. “Well, I could ask Oikawa.”

“I don’t think he would appreciate that very much, Bokuto-san. And neither will Kuroo-san.”

“Hm? Why do you bring them up?” 

“Admittedly, I haven’t been very nice to either of them, especially Kuroo-san.” 

“Well… no you haven’t, but you’re perfectly kind to me! But I have to ask… how come you haven’t shooed me away like a pest?” 

This gets a little laugh from Akaashi. “To be honest, I have no idea. You make it very hard for anyone to be rude to you, Bokuto-san. You’re awfully nice.”

A blush dusts Bokuto’s cheekbones. “T-thanks!” 

The raven hums. 

“Hey! Why don’t you play the piano?” Bokuto suggests. 

“That’s… not a bad idea. Would you like to come along?” Akaashi says, standing up from his seat. He goes to the counter and asks permission from Konoha, who  
says yes.

Akaashi walks towards the grand piano, Bokuto pulling out the stool for the both of them to sit on. He opens the lid, and takes off the felt that protects the keys. He folds it neatly, and sets it on top. 

“Let’s see… what should I play?” 

“Maybe… something from Sleeping Beauty?”

Akaashi blinks, surprised with Bokuto. He didn’t peg him as the type to listen to classical music. 

“I didn’t think you would listen to classical music, Bokuto-san.”

Bokuto smiles at Akaashi. He wasn’t. He really wasn’t. 

However, after seeing the younger play at the café the other day, of course he’d start to get interested. 

The pianist shakes his hands to loosen them up, pulling at his fingers to stretch them. He took a deep breath, positioning his hands on the keys. 

He began to play the [ Dance of the Sugarplum Fairy,](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YDbEXaqR-eQ) just as a warm up. 

The notes were light and fun as they resounded all throughout the café, and a smile made its way on Akaashi’s face. He forgot about Bokuto sitting next to him for a moment, and let his fingers dance over the keys. 

Bokuto’s eyes widened as he watched the pianist. Akaashi looked so at peace. His curls gently framed his face, and his eyes were gentle as he watched his hands. 

The lighting of the café added even more to the relaxed vibe Akaashi was emitting. 

He was a masterpiece. There should be a sign hovering nearby him, saying “To help us preserve the art, please do not touch.” 

The back of Bokuto’s eyes started to throb and he felt light-headed by the time the pianist finished. He realized, it was because he forgot how to breathe. 

Oh my god. 

Akaashi let out a sigh. “Great, not my hands are warmed up. Any requests in particular, Bokuto-san?” 

“How about the [ Waltz?”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t6PalFgbWiw)Bokuto challenged. From what he had heard, the piece sounded extremely complicated. 

However, Akaashi doesn’t disappoint. He merely smirks. “Gladly.” 

It was such a stark contrast from the last piece he played, that it caught the attention of the other customers. All of them stopped whatever they were doing to watch Akaashi play. 

Bokuto took a moment to watch Akaashi’s hands. His fingers were long and slender, perfect for reaching all the keys. They moved elegantly and fluidly along the keys.

The whole piece was so fast-paced, the pianist never resting for more than a second on each key. 

It was amazing, how quickly Akaashi was able to shift his hands in order to reach each note, never floundering. 

Somewhere along the way, Akaashi started laughing quietly, a proper smile finally making an appearance on his usually stoic face. 

Bokuto didn’t register his back coming in contact with the floor, until Akaashi stopped playing, standing up abruptly and looking down at Bokuto’s stunned expression. 

“Bokuto-san, are you alright?” 

Bokuto blinked owlishly at the face hovering above his. He really was going to die. 

Up close, Bokuto could see the green of Akaashi’s eyes, and the little flecks of gold were sprinkled in them. His skin was so smooth, and his lips were so… wow. Bokuto would really like to kiss them. 

He wonders what Akaashi’s face would feel like in his hands, or how his breath would fan across his face. 

“Bokuto-san?” 

Bokuto sputters for a moment, sitting up. “Y-yeah, I’m fine.” Never breaking eye-contact with the freshman. A little crinkle had formed between Akaashi’s  
eyebrows as he looked at the taller man worriedly. 

Bokuto really wanted to reach over and smooth the crease between his eyebrows, and kiss his frown away. 

Akaashi is startled when Bokuto slaps his hands over his face, and muffles his scream into them. 

“Bokuto-san, you’re turning really red, are you sure you’re alright?’ 

“Akaashi-kun, have you ever heard of blushing?” Konoha quips, a shit-eating grin on his face. 

“Why would he-?”

“Konoha, shut up.” Bokuto retorts, pulling his hands away from his face. 

Akaashi stands up from where he was squatting, and offers a hand, which Bokuto gladly takes. (because why would he pass up an opportunity to hold hands with Akaashi, duh.)

Bokuto straightens, brushing himself off, and he looks up and realized that he’s still holding Akaashi’s hand. He takes a moment to appreciate how warm they are, and how they engulf his. 

“Um.” Akaashi says, and Bokuto lets go. 

Akaashi feels the tips of his ears turn red. Now he was the one blushing. 

“Sorry! I interrupted your piece!” Bokuto bows at Akaashi, as well as the other customers.

“It’s fine. Are you sure you’re alright?” 

“Yeah, yeah! No worries!” He waves him off.

“Bokuto-san, how did you even fall off the chair?” 

“Well, I guess you could say you blew me away!” Bokuto’s mouth acts first before his mind can process what he’s saying. He squeaks, realizing what he just said. But the look on Akaashi’s face makes it worth it. He looks absolutely startled, and his eyes flicker to the floor. 

They have an audience. Some people laugh, and whistle. Akaashi has to bite the inside of his cheek to stop himself from smiling, and he fiddles with his hands. Bokuto gives a good-natured laugh, and winks, his golden eyes sparkling with mischief. 

Much to Akaashi’s dismay, his heart races in his chest. 

 

A few songs later, Bokuto’s stomach growls loudly, just as Akaashi is closing the piano. They both halt, looking at each other. Until Bokuto laughs, and Akaashi hides a smile.

“Well, we’ve been here all day!”

"It was fun, Bokuto-san.” 

Bokuto practically _glows._ “Thank you for keeping me company today, ‘Kaashi.” 

The latter waves him off. They both go back to their seat, got their things, and exited the store after bidding goodbye to Konoha and Komi.

“Hey, Akaashi, since you’re probably going to say no to going out to dinner with me, how about you cook dinner instead?” 

“Uh...”

"I'm the only one that hasn't had a chance to taste your cooking!"

"That's not true. It's only Oikawa-san that's ate my food." 

"But still!" Bokuto shrieks.

"You're paying." 

Bokuto gapes and stops in his steps. Akaashi raises his eyebrows at him. 

“You’re actually going to do it, ‘Kaashi?” 

“Well, you asked.” 

So, off to the grocery they went, and the whole thing involved Bokuto putting random items in the cart and Akaashi fixing him a look that says ‘put it back,’ He pouts, but does it anyway. 

Akaashi spots a familiar tuft of brown hair bobbing in between the isles. He squints and ducks, telling Bokuto he’ll be right back as he goes to the other section of the store. He sees Oikawa, peeking up from behind one of the racks, furrowing his eyebrows when he doesn’t find what he was looking at. 

“Oikawa-san.” 

This startles the brunette, looking at Akaashi like he’d been caught red-handed. “Aka-chan!” 

“Have you been spying?” 

“Psh, of course not.” 

Akaashi continues to stare. 

“I only saw you when I entered! Why, have you guys been together all day?” 

Akaashi proceeds to look somewhere else. “No.” 

Oikawa lets out a scandalized gasp. “You liar!” 

“Akaashi!” Bokuto calls out, turning into the isle the other two were in. Oikawa’s eyes widen, and Akaashi realizes how awfully domestic the whole thing seems. 

“I thought you were getting snacks or something! Why do you look like you’re about to have thanksgiving!” 

“Akaashi’s cooking! 

Oikawa barks out a laugh. “Oh my- that’s!” Oikawa gasps for breath, his glasses askew. 

“Oikawa-san, if you want any, I’d suggest that you stop laughing this very second.” 

Oikawa blinks. “Really? I was just planning to have some cup noodles for dinner or something.” 

“If, and only if you stop laughing.” 

“Okay, okay! Will do.” 

They get the last of the ingredients, and walk back to the dorms with their arms full of bags. 

Together, they climb the steps and hurry to the kitchen. 

“So, Aka-chan, what are you cooking?” 

“Salmon.” 

“You know, usually with school starting, most of us forget to eat.” 

Akaashi balks. Bokuto corrects Oikawa. “You mean _you_ do. That’s why Iwaizumi gets so damn worried.” 

“Hey! Kuroo does too!”

“Nowhere near as often as you do!” 

Oikawa sulks. 

Akaashi simply puts the salmon in a marinade of lemon, soy sauce, and olive oil. He lets it sit for a while, cutting up a small chunk of butter into the pan to let it  
melt. 

He cuts up the asparagus, tossing it into the pan with the butter after washing it and sprinkling it with a little bit of salt. 

Bokuto watches Akaashi move around the kitchen with ease, smiling fondly. 

Oikawa nudges him with his shoulder. “You’re totally smitten.” He says quietly.

“Um. I don’t know if you need a new prescription for your contact lenses, Oikawa. Have you seen him?”

“Yeah. I definitely see why he’s attractive… but I think you should be careful.”

“He’s harmless! He just loves math and playing the piano. Like, that’s literally it.” 

“He plays… the piano. Oh my god.” 

“He’s really good at it too? Like, we were at the café-“ 

“You were at the café? Together?” 

“Oikawa, are you going to let me finish or not.” 

“Right, sorry! Continue.” 

“Anyway, so yeah- we were at Fukurodani’s and then, you know the grand piano there right? I think we sat there for a good hour or two just playing.” 

“Since when did you play piano?”

“Let me rephrase that, he played, and I gawked. Truly the sight was amazing.” 

“I wanna see him play,” Oikawa whines, pouting. 

Bokuto tells him about the time Kuroo tried to embarrass Akaashi, and Oikawa laughs. “I would pay good money to see that.- And since when did you like classical music?” 

“Since Akaashi. Duh.” Bokuto says, as if It’s the most obvious thing ever. 

Oikawa chokes on the water he was drinking as he stops himself from laughing. 

Akaashi only hears bits and pieces of the conversation as he cooks. He plates the finished meal, setting it down in front of them. 

“It smells great, ‘Kaashi!” Bokuto says, and thanks him for the meal. 

Oikawa snorts. “You sound like a husband.” 

Of course, Bokuto and Akaashi have to tell Oikawa to shut up at the same time, Akaashi’s with the ever-present honorific. 

Oikawa puts up his hands in surrender. “Okay, but Bo-chan is right, this smells amazing.” 

“Thank you.” Akaashi says, and he catches Kuroo stumble through the doorway, sniffing the air. 

Akaashi, figuring the others would want some as well, ‘accidentally,’ cooks extra. 

“What is that? It’s so fragrant.” Kuroo says. He walks over to the stove, his mouth watering at the sight of the freshly grilled fish. 

“Can I have some?” 

“Help yourself.” Akaashi says, sitting down at the dining table and handing the other two a pair of chopsticks. 

“Wait… Akaashi cooked this?” Kuroo sounds skeptical.

“Um, does it look like anyone else here can actually cook?” Oikawa retorts, blowing on a clump of rice on his chopsticks.

“Why are you eating it? He could have poisoned it, or something!” Kuroo exclaims. 

Akaashi merely rolls his eyes. 

“If you’re not eating it, I will.” Kenma also makes an appearance in the doorway, however his eyes were fixated on the handheld. 

Together, Oikawa and Bokuto take a bite out of their food. They share a look, eyes wide, slump over, and moan. Really loudly, that Akaashi’s face pinks lightly. 

“I take it that it’s good?” 

The two nod frantically, now shoveling food into their mouths at an alarming rate. 

“Please slow down, I wouldn’t want either of you to choke. You can save that for another time.” Akaashi calmly remarks, hinting at what he had witnessed that  
morning. 

Kuroo cackles, and Bokuto nearly spits out his food. Kenma lets out a surprised laugh. 

“Aka-chan!”

\----

Akaashi stays up that night.

He’s feeling far too conflicted with himself. While hanging out with Bokuto today hadn’t been… bad, there was still some underlying discomfort with everything. It was nice to feel somewhat relaxed, and it wasn’t until hanging out with Bokuto had made him realize how tiring it was to push people away. Or how tiring it was to keep the ice he had formed around himself from thawing when he was around the other man. His whole presence was just so… 

Akaashi didn’t even have a word for it. 

It terrified Akaashi how easily he had let Bokuto poke and prod at him all day. And even more than that, he actually liked it. He liked the warmth that Bokuto gave off when he was sitting next to Akaashi while he was playing. He liked how he’d squawk whenever Akaashi would finish a particularly difficult combination. 

Maybe he’d just have to keep his distance.-Stop him from getting too close. 

But he wasn’t so sure how long he could do that for.

 

“I don’t get it. Why is he so nice to you?” Kuroo asks, frowning. 

“Beats me.” Bokuto shrugs. 

“But if he wants to be your lover, he’s gotta get with your friends.” 

“Kuroo. You’re cancelled.” 

“Fine. Don’t stay up too late.”

“I won’t! I’ll be seeing Akaashi in my dreams.” 

“Is that a dream or a nightmare?” 

“Shut up. He fed you.” 

Kuroo huffs. Though he had to admit, the salmon was pretty good.

Bokuto closes his eyes with a last thought. 

_‘Just who are you, Akaashi Keiji?’_

\----

There’s a saying about a moth and a mayfly.

The mayfly asks the moth, “Why are you so attracted to the flame when you know It’s going to hurt you? You’re not like me, who’s life only lasts so long.” 

And the moth answers, “The flame is too beautiful for me not to throw myself in to.” 

In that sense, one could say that Bokuto was the moth, and Akaashi was the flame that would lead to his demise. 

However, the sophomore didn’t know that, and continued to dance around the flame- coming closer every time. 

But he’ll get burnt if he gets too close. 

 

The library, was no longer a place Akaashi could hide. Bokuto would tag along whenever he saw him, and it was proving increasingly difficult to keep a boundary between them. 

Bokuto was just so… disarming. 

“Akaaashi, go for a walk with me!” 

It wasn’t a question, it was a demand. Something Akaashi had grown familiar hearing over the past few days. 

“I have to finish all my homework, Bokuto-san.” 

“Oh come on! You’re either at the dorm or at the library, both times you’re slouched over your computer.” 

Akaashi reflexively straightens his back when Bokuto mentioned him slouching. “I don’t slouch, Bokuto-san.” 

“Seriously, you need to live a little.” 

Oh dear, if only Bokuto knew what kind of situation Akaashi was in. 

The freshman smirks scornfully. 

“Akaaashi!!!” 

“Bokuto-san, you’re disturbing the other students.” 

“There’s no one else here!” 

“In that case, you’re disturbing me. If you’re going to continue being rowdy, please go find Kuroo-san.” 

“Then come back?” 

“That’s even worse. Just, please let me finish my work.” 

Bokuto relents, draping himself over the back of his chair.

He takes the time to watch the boy sitting in front of him, like he’s done countlessly every time they were together. Every time he would look at Akaashi, he  
would notice something new about the other boy. 

Like, right now, he realizes that Akaashi has really good eyebrows, and the little piece of hair that he tucks behind his ear. But that’s just a few of the things he’s observed. He’s realized that Akaashi has really nice cheekbones, and that he had really long eyelashes. He also has really, soft-looking hair- something Bokuto has expressed wanting to run his fingers through repeatedly. 

He also thinks that Akaashi’s hands might be larger than his, probably because his fingers are longer. He takes note that Akaashi always wears oversized shirts, accompanied with skinny jeans. 

Akaashi rolls his lips in and squints for a second when he thinks about something. He also cracks his knuckles a lot. His thumb and his pinky finger in particular. 

Sometimes, Akaashi spaces out. Like, really spaces out. Bokuto could call out to him for a few minutes and he wouldn’t reply at all. (Which, Bokuto didn’t realize, was probably Akaashi seizing.)

But he also doesn’t miss the way that Akaashi doesn’t let Bokuto get too close. It’s like, he had drawn a line between them, and while Bokuto didn’t mind, he really wished they weren’t at a standstill. 

Certainly, it was better than before. Akaashi doesn’t really push him away anymore, but he doesn’t initiate any kind of contact. 

But sometimes, he’d catch Akaashi slip, like he’d say something he wasn’t meant to say, and then he’ll be stiff for the rest of the conversation. He’s also picked up on the fact that Akaashi always prepares food for himself. Bokuto’s never seen him go to the library or at the convenience store. Bokuto had so many questions that he wanted answers to. But he’d never intentionally pry in Akaashi’s business. He figured he would maybe, tell him one day. 

“Say, Akaashi- do you wanna play volleyball?” 

Bokuto doesn’t miss him hesitate. 

“I can’t. Sorry, Bokuto-san.” 

“Are you sure? We don’t have to play a game… just… toss to me?” 

“I was never very good at it, Bokuto-san.” 

“Well, I wouldn’t know! I’ve never seen you play.” 

“You don’t need to, Bokuto-san. I promise I’m no star player like you.” 

“You’ve seen me play?” 

Akaashi stiffens, eyes widening for a moment. “Y-yeah. Hasn’t everyone?” 

“I suppose that’s true. But anyway! –Even Kenma plays every once in a while.” 

“I have to say, Oikawa-san’s skills as a setter are truly something else.” 

“Right? I would never tell him, because I’m sure he knows already, but he’s an amazing player, you know? And ridiculously smart, too. Like, he scares me. And all of us worry for him, because he works himself to the bone! He never falls behind during practice, and he’s majoring in a pretty difficult course! Man, he’s superhuman or something. 

Sometimes, when I feel like giving up, I remember Oikawa’s last match in highschool. The dude practically ran- no, crashed into a table to save a ball! I tell myself, ‘Oikawa ran into a table, landed on his band knee, and continued to play- and you can’t even do _this?_ Get it together!’ And then, I usually do a decent job.” 

Akaashi shakes his head. Though, that sounds like a pretty good tip. 

“Kuroo-san’s blocks are certainly intimidating. I would hate to go up against something like that.” 

“Right? Oh, man he’s so annoying! But he’s also really good at what he does. Like, he plays a really big part in our defense. Like I said, I used to play against him a lot, and there would be a part of me dreading the match, ‘cos usually he’s my hype-man, but he’d shut me down during a game sometimes and I’d feel really bad about it. But that’s okay! Strong opponents make volleyball all the more fun. I’m just glad he’s my teammate now.” 

“You have two liberos, don’t you?” 

“Hm? Oh yeah! You must be talking about Yaku and Noya. Noya’s a new addition, but he’s really good. He’s the one other person besides Yaku I’ve seen execute a proper block-receive. Legends, the both of them. I love volleyball.” 

The last part was random, and Akaashi couldn’t help but give a small smile. It was cute seeing him talk about something he loved with so much passion. 

_Wait,_ did Akaashi just call him cute? That’s bad. Very bad. He was getting too comfortable around him. 

Bokuto, sensing Akaashi’s inner turmoil- (he did the thing.) voices out his concern. “Hey, you okay?” 

“Yes. Thank you, for your concern Bokuto-san. I just realized- I had to go do something.” 

“So soon?” 

“Yeah, I’m sorry. Thank you for keeping me company.” 

“Oh- um, okay? Take care of yourself!” 

Akaashi nods, and speedily walks off. 

“Huh. That was weird.” 

 

Akaashi was totally frazzled. He needed an outlet. He was beyond confused. 

He bumps into Oikawa as he exits the library. His head shoots up.

“Woah, there, what’s got you in a hurry?” 

“Oikawa-san, do you know where the music room is?” 

“The music room? You’ll have to go upstairs and pass the connecting corridor. The music department is in a totally different building.” 

“Thank you.” 

Akaashi jogs away, his mind a mess. His thoughts were running a mile a minute. 

He makes his way up the stairs, stumbling- a few students glance in his direction. He takes the passage into the next building. He was probably going to get in  
trouble for this, he wasn’t even a student in the music department. But the café was too far. 

He looks at the signs, one of the arrows is pointing down the hall to the music rooms. 

Most of them seem to be occupied, and Akaashi wants to scream. 

Luckily, the very last music room at the end of the corridor was empty. He sighs in relief. 

Dropping his bag onto the floor, he plops onto the stool, pulling the cover off of the piano. 

The lid is closed, which would trap the sound. –Similar to what Akaashi is feeling at the moment. 

He grunts, standing up to push open the lid, revealing the golden strings. 

He needed a piece that would get him tired.-Something that would leave him completely exhausted. He decided on [ Etude in C-sharp minor by Chopin, ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3_GTxBP7t5o) a piece that left his hands trembling and his heart hammering whenever he’d finish it. 

He didn’t even warm up his hands, but he couldn’t bring himself to care.

So he plays. He pours every single ounce of confusion and frustration and _anger_ towards himself, into playing. How. How could Bokuto just appear and scramble Akaashi’s insides as if it were a damn egg? 

A memory of Bokuto smiling makes an appearance in Akaashi’s thoughts, and he has a sharp in-take of breath. 

Seriously? 

Akaashi plays even harder. 

He couldn’t and he wouldn’t. He was not going to disappoint Bokuto like that. 

Bad idea. Bad idea. Opening up, even a little bit- was such a bad idea. He was just going to keep shedding each layer around himself that he had carefully  
constructed the more he hung out with him. 

He thinks he hears Bokuto’s laugh somewhere. He lets out a shout. 

Akaashi never shouts. He finishes the piece. He isn’t tired, nor does he feel at ease.

He starts another one. [ Chopin Étude Op.25 No.11. Winter Wind. ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lIdqPKy1jHg)

He gives himself a moment to breathe during the intro. The calm before the storm.

Then, the storm comes alive. 

The first emotion. Confusion. Why does he think Bokuto it cute? Why can’t he tell him to screw off like he did with Kuroo and Oikawa? I mean, sure maybe his conversation with Yoichi and Akemi-san the other say made him rethink himself, but all he was planning to do was maybe refrain from being hostile? But he cooked Bokuto- and even the others, a damn dinner! Why now? Why. He’s never been interested in other people before, so why now?

The second emotion. Frustration. His stupid heart skips a beat whenever he sees Bokuto and Akaashi wants it to _stop._ When did he become so soft? He’s frustrated with himself- and Yoichi, stupid Yoichi (Akaashi doesn’t mean that, he adores his little brother), for bringing up the topic and making him second-guess himself. And he’s frustrated, because why does he want to hug Bokuto so damn bad? –It’s the biceps he tells himself. But no It’s more than that, a voice at the back of his mind says. He wants to know what it feels like to be in his arms. He’d probably feel all safe and warm and secure and- _what the fuck._ Is a part of his frustration _romantic?_ Was he _pining?_

God no. Oh gods, _no._

The third emotion. Anger. He was angry at himself. He was angry that part of him had begun to like Bokuto’s company. He shouldn’t have said yes when Bokuto took him out for coffee the other day. Shouldn’t have cooked dinner. He was angry because there was a part of him that doesn’t regret saying yes. Hell, he wanted their friendship to go past the fine line he had drawn between them, but he _can’t._ It’s too risky. 

And Akaashi has never been one to take risks. 

Too scared. _Too scared._ Akemi-san had been right when she said Akaashi was letting fear rule his life, but fear was the only thing stopping him from getting anyone else involved. He was getting really tired of having to tell himself the same things over and over again. Why wouldn’t his brain cooperate? 

Or maybe… maybe he had just been lying to himself the whole time. 

And now he had to face the truth. Maybe he had been keeping people away for his own selfish reasons. Because he didn’t want _himself_ to get hurt. Not because he didn’t want to make it harder for everyone. He just wanted to make it easy for himself. 

He finishes the piece. 

Akaashi is left in a deafening silence. 

“I finally got to hear you play. You’re as amazing as Bo-chan said you were.” 

“Oikawa-san. What are you doing here?” Akaashi jolts.

“You were looking pretty distraught! Oikawa Tooru is here to offer his wisdom.” 

Akaashi barely registers Oikawa plop down on the seat beside him. His hands are trembling, and there’s a light sheen of sweat covering his forehead. But he still manages to move away to create some distance between them. 

There was a moment of slience.

“Listen, Aka-chan. I don’t know what you’re so afraid of. But the people here, Ken-chan, Bo-chan, Kuroo-chan- they… They’re good people. I have to admit, I can be pretty shitty. But you know what? Every time… they stuck with me. So… if you’re afraid that they’ll leave. I can promise that they won’t.” Oikawa says, voice gentle. He reaches for Akaashi, and the latter flinches.

Akaashi suddenly feels faint, and his palms are sweating. His shoulder jolts, and his eye is twitching. His vision is beginning to get fuzzy at the edges. Shit. 

“Now now, not now, why does it have to happen here, of all places?” Akaashi is muttering furiously under his breath, blinking with the hopes that his sight would clear. 

“Aka-chan…?” 

“Oikawa-san, how much do you know about seizures?” 

“What?” He sounds alarmed. 

“ _How much._ Do you know about seizures? I’m about to have one.” 

“Fuck! What do you mean you’re about to have a seizure? Stay here, I’ll get help-“

“No, no It’s fine. I just need you stay with me, alright?” 

Akaashi gets off of the stool and collapses on the floor. “Akaashi!” 

“Turn me on my side once it starts. If I’m out for more than five minutes, call an ambulance, okay?”

“I don’t think-“ 

“Listen, Oikawa-san, you can do this.” Was the last thing Akaashi says before he loses control over his entire body. 

Oikawa squeaks, his heart hammering loudly against his ribcage, and kneels beside the younger’s body.

Gently, he pulls Akaashi onto his side. 

He fumbles with his phone, timing It just like Akaashi said. The brunette was trying to give him some privacy. 

It’s been four minutes when Akaashi finally settles. 

Oikawa lets out a breath he hadn’t known he was holding. 

Is he supposed to be unconscious? Shit.

He calls Iwaizumi, trying to sound nonchalant. “Hey, Iwa-chan!” 

“What do you want, Tooru?” 

“You’re always so grumpy! Miss me already?” 

“Yes.” Was Iwaizumi’s short reply. 

“Um-I-I miss you too!- Don’t do that, Hajime! Anyway, when someone has a seizure are they supposed to be unconscious afterwards?” 

“Hm? Why, is something wrong?” 

“No, Iwa-chan just answer the question.” 

“Yeah It’s normal for them to be unconscious but not for long. Tooru, what is this¬-?” 

“Okay! That’s all I needed to know, Iwa-chan! Thanks!” He ends the call before Iwaizumi can ask any more questions. 

Oikawa looks at Akaashi again, and he almost scoffs at the angelic look on his face. He props up his head with his jacket before gently shaking him. 

“Akaashi?”

Green eyes flutter open, and blink a few times. 

“Oh God! You’re awake! Jesus, you scared me!” 

“Sorry for the inconvenience.” Though, Akaashi doesn’t quite look at Oikawa, and suddenly everything clicks. 

“You’re epileptic.” Oikawa says. A statement, and not a question. “That’s why… you’re wary of other people.”Akaashi doesn’t speak, and Oikawa takes that as a sign to continue. “Is it because, when your friends found out, they started treating you differently, and then… they left you all together?” 

Akaashi gives a faint little nod. "Congratulations. I must say, this is quite unexpected. You've won by default." 

He definitely doesn’t expect Oikawa to hit him on the shoulder. 

“Ow! What the-?” 

“If that happens often, Aka-chan, then you shouldn’t be alone all the time! I would think that someone like you would be more responsible! What if that happened and I wasn’t here? What then, huh? Stupid, stupid, stupid, Akaashi!” Oikawa punctuates the last few words with succeeding hits to Akaashi’s shoulder.

“And you had some really shitty friends in high school, what the fuck? They find out you’re sick and they leave you?” 

This whole conversation had Akaashi backpedaling. 

“Akaashi- Aka-chan? Are you even listening to me?” 

“I’m awfully confused.” 

“About what?” 

“Why aren’t you leaving?” 

“Leaving? Aka-chan, I’m offended that you think so lowly of me.- And that’s about the last thing any normal person would do. If anything, I’m going to be hovering over you every moment.” 

“Please don’t.” 

“I take it you haven’t told Bo-chan? Or were you not planning to tell anyone, save for me because I just had to deal with you firsthand.” 

Akaashi doesn’t answer. 

“You know, if there’s anyone that’s not going to leave you, it would be Bokuto. He’s got a huge heart.” 

“Noted…” 

“Aka-chan, I’m serious.” 

“Please don’t tell anyone else, Oikawa-san.” 

“Again, I’m offended. Of course I wouldn’t! My soon-to-be profession does involve a lot of secrecy, you know.” 

“Right.” 

“You can trust me.” Oikawa says with so much conviction, and Akaashi is surprised at the amount of sincerity his brown eyes hold. 

Akaashi visibly relaxes a little, and he feels a part of the weight lift off of his chest. A part of it- because what Oikawa discovered is just half of it. He doesn’t know that Akaashi probably had 5 years left to live, give or take.

“Anyway, why did you look so stressed earlier? I haven’t seen anyone run that fast since Chibi-chan.” 

Akaashi colors. 

“Don’t tell me… has it something to do with Bo-chan?” 

“No.” 

“You answered a little too quickly there, Aka-chan. You look like a strawberry- by the way. A really cute one.” 

Akaashi fists his hands to refrain from playing with them. 

“You were playing rather aggressively, I was scared the piano would break. And I never would have thought I’d hear the day you’d scream.”

Akaashi sighs, running his hands down his face. Oikawa was on a whole other level of nosy. 

“As I said a while ago, Bokuto would be the last person on earth to do what your friends in high school did. So… if he asks you on a date, say yes.” 

A part of him was keeping this a secret because he didn’t want to concern anyone else to deal with his little episodes first hand, but also because revealing one-half of the secret, eventually meant revealing the other. 

“We’ll see. Oikawa-san, pardon me, but your boyfriend has been calling for the past few minutes.” 

“How’d you know he was my boyfriend?” Oikawa gapes. 

“I heard bits and pieces of your conversation earlier, -I appreciate you not quite revealing the whole context of the situation. But I believe you addressed him by his first name. And you two were pretty intimate in the kitchen the other day.” 

Oikawa has a light blush dusting his cheeks. He wonders if that’s what he looks like whenever he thinks of Bokuto. 

“Ah, he’s probably worried.”

“You should answer that.” 

“You don’t mind?” 

“Not at all.” 

Oikawa says a silent prayer before answering the phone. “Haji-“ 

“Shittykawa! You finally answered your goddamn phone! Are you okay?” 

“I’m fine, Iwa-chan! Calm down.” 

“Why were you asking about seizures? Is it Akaashi?” 

“Um.” 

Akaashi casts a look at Oikawa. 

“That’s a yes. Is he okay now?” 

“Yeah, yeah he’s fine. How’d you know it was about Akaashi, Iwa-chan?” 

“Well, I thought about it, and the others don’t have epilepsy- well, not to my knowledge, then I remembered that meal that he cooked for us the other day. High-fat, Low-carb.” 

Akaashi sighed. Well, it couldn’t be helped. Iwaizumi was a med-student. 

“Don’t tell the others, okay Hajime? Never ever speak of this conversation again.” 

“Um. Okay? But wouldn’t it make sense for the others to know so that they could prepare-“ 

“Don’t worry about that now, I’ll take care of Aka-chan.” 

“That’s really impractical, Shittykawa-“ 

“Bye-bye, Iwa-chan! I love you!” 

“Oi, Oikawa!” 

Tooru ends the phone call. “I’ll be getting an earful later!” He whines. 

Keiji smiles. 

“Oh yeah, Kuroo wants to know why you hate him.” 

“I don’t hate Kuroo-san.” Akaashi furrows his eyebrows. 

“You don’t?” 

“No. He can be really annoying, but- I don’t hate him. I didn’t hate any of you, actually. I think that was just my defense mechanism talking.” 

“Oh, well that’s a relief. So, anyway, what are you planning to do now?” 

“Ugh, truthfully, I don’t know. This whole thing has put my mind into disarray.” 

“Like that spongebob meme where it’s like, his brain, and then it’s like, on fire?”

“Oikawa-san, I can’t believe you just used a meme to portray my mental state.” 

“Well, is it accurate?” 

“I- well… yes, it is.” 

“See! On a different note, are you feeling better now? Maybe I should take you to go see the nurse or something-“ 

“No, I should be alright. I don’t think I hit my head too hard.” 

"Are you sure?"

A nod. 

And and idea pops into Oikawa's brain. “Hey, why don’t we go to an amusement park, or something?” 

“That’s quite spontaneous of you.” 

“No, I mean some other time! Iwa-chan could go, maybe even Ken-chan and Kuroo-chan, Suga-chan and Daichi, y’know… it could be like, one big group date!” 

“I don’t know… I don’t wanna risk something like this happening while we go on that supposed group date. I don’t wanna ruin the experience for anyone.” 

“Well, you can tell when It’s about to happen right? We can work around that…” 

“I don’t wanna cause a scene…” 

“Oh come on, Aka-chan! Let’s have a little fun!” 

Akaashi Keiji had never been to an amusement park before. He had gotten sick on the day of their field trip and was unable to go, and his mom refused to let him go on any other occasion, saying it was too dangerous. Wouldn’t saying yes to this go against his mom?

But, it was a small act of rebellion in comparison to how sheltered he’d been. And his mom does after all want him to live the last few years of his life in happiness. Maybe Akaashi did want to die saying that he didn’t have any regrets Up until now, he didn’t think he would have anything to regret. . -And something told him, that saying no to this request would end up being one.

“Plus, I think Bo-chan would really like that.”

“Why did you bring him up suddenly?” 

“You like him, don’t you?”

“Where did you get that idea?” 

“Um, Aka-chan, are you trying to make a joke?” 

“No?” 

“I don’t know, maybe it’s because you haven’t been mean to him once? You played the piano for him? You went to the grocery together? You cooked for him?” 

“Right. I did that.” 

“You did that!” 

Akaashi sighs. “I’ll do it.” 

“You what? I didn’t quite hear you.” 

“I said, I’ll do it.” 

“I heard you the first time.” 

“You’re so childish.” 

“But you’re into that, aren’t you?”

“Kindly shut up, Oikawa-san.”

\---- 

Akaashi was spent by the time he gets back to the dorm. Kenma is there, lying upside down by the side of his bed.

“You’re looking pretty red, Kenma-san. I’d suggest you sit back up.” 

Kenma does so, albeit clumsily. “I’m bored. Kuro is studying for a test. ” 

Akaashi crawls under his covers, ridding himself of his skinny jeans, and pulls out his laptop. 

“Are you into horror movies, Kenma-san?” The blonde visibly perks up at the mention.

“You have any good ones?” 

“Depends… what do you have in mind?” 

“I’ve been interested in the Babadook for a while. I haven’t gotten around to watching it yet.” Kenma settles in the space besides Akaashi, dragging his own duvet  
along with him. – Much to the latter’s surprise. But he’s too tired to argue.

Akaashi scrolls through his folders, and is satisfied when he finds the file. He clicks it. They watch. Akaashi finds that the both of them aren’t the type to scream or flinch at any kind of jump scare. In fact, Kenma doesn’t flinch _at all,_ and even Akaashi has to hold his breath every once in a while.

Somewhere in the middle of the movie, Kenma utters something in his quiet voice. “Why’d you get into horror movies?”

“I don’t know. They just seemed interesting to me. I got curious as to what people were so afraid of. The whole thing is fictional. What about you?” While that wasn’t at all a lie, what Akaashi didn’t tell Kenma, is that this was probably his only source of anything remotely exciting in his boring life. He couldn’t exactly do much.

“Games. Though they get kinda boring, when no one wants to play with me.”

“Kuroo-san doesn’t play with you?” 

“That wimp? No.” Kenma snorts. 

“Huh. Why is it that it doesn’t come at me as a surprise?”

They both snicker. 

Akaashi finds, that there’s something about being in Kenma’s presence that calms him. He wasn’t overwhelming, and Akaashi appreciated the fact that he never tried to pry. He was just there. 

They don’t speak for the rest of the movie. –By the time the credits are rolling, Kenma has curled up and has fallen asleep. Akaashi sighs and shuts down his computer. He falls asleep not too soon after.

Akaashi had one last thought before he fully drifted out of consciousness. 

Oikawa hadn't been too late.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Also, I've decided that I don't know how long this story will be, but I'm planning to update at least once or twice every month, with a minimum of 9K words, I hope that's fine with you all! 
> 
> -Basil


	3. friends

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> LATE. SO VERY EXTREMELY LATE. 
> 
> I should just put it out there that I'm not very good with updating in the time frame I have given myself but I really am trying here! I feel so bad- but I hope this chapter makes up for it :-( Though it probably doesn't. Even so, here you are! 
> 
> this chapter is 10K words i love myself 
> 
> -Basil

Later on that same week, an academic meeting would be ensuing. Thus, Oikawa’s plans of going to the amusement park were set into action. 

If Akaashi was being honest, he was quite nervous for the whole thing to occur, considering he had never been around such a large group of people, much more- people he wasn’t quite familiar with. 

That, and the fact that he was a ticking time-bomb, left him uneasy. It was Thursday, and despite Akaashi looking relatively normal, the constant fiddling of his hands probably gave him away. 

He had very little contact with Oikawa, Bokuto, and Kuroo during the week, and Kenma informs him one night that they were busy training. 

So, he was left to deal with his inner turmoil by himself. 

Thursday night, he falls asleep with much difficulty. He would have slept through the whole day, except there was the whole, group-date ordeal. Rather, the other 6 people included were dating, and Akaashi would be left to awkwardly fend for himself as he trails behind the rest of them. Though, he doubts Oikawa would let him, because after their little conversation, the brunette took it upon himself to check up on him at least once every hour. 

It was annoying, to say the least, yet it made his heart feel funny, and his clothes feel tight. But not in the same way with Bokuto. 

Oikawa, ever so _considerate_ barges in their room on a Friday morning at the ass-crack of dawn. 

Kenma wasn’t pleased. 

“Up, up! We have that date today! It’s a weekday, which means that the lines will be relatively short, come on!” Oikawa cheers, a sleepy Kuroo in tow. Bokuto, to no one’s surprise, remained the same. 

In fact, Bokuto was even more energetic than usual. The reason being, one, they would be going to an amusement park, and who doesn’t get excited for that- and two, he would be seeing Akaashi again. 

Akaashi hasn’t moved an inch. Oikawa thinks the worst.

Immediately, he crouches beside the raven’s bed, prodding at him. 

“Aka-chan?” A shift. “Aka-chan? Aka-chan? Akaashi-“ Oikawa sounds more and more frantic with each time he utters his name. 

“Oikawa-san, I’m not _deceased,_ please lower your voice.” Akaashi mumbles, finally. 

The other three in the room hold their breaths, having witnessed the heavy-sleepers wrath, and here was Oikawa shaking him like a damn piñata. 

“Oh, thank god!” Oikawa exclaims, and lets out a breath. 

To everyone else, it just seems like Oikawa being dramatic, as per-usual, but they were yet to get to know Akaashi.

“Just leave without me, it’s far too early.” Akaashi continues. 

Oikawa frowns, hands on his hips. He ponders for a bit, then his face lights up as if he had just thought of the most _brilliant_ idea. 

Then, he proceeds to give the duvet a rather _hard_ pull, and Akaashi’s attempts at staying on the bed are futile.

He lands on the floor with a loud thump. Kuroo and Kenma wince, Bokuto claps his hands over his mouth. 

Akaashi’s eyes blink open, and sees a very proud-looking Oikawa. With much struggle, he untangles himself from his sheets, and stands up. He dumps them on the bed. 

Oikawa’s face still hasn’t changed. 

“Oikawa-san, you have a stubborn looking piece of hair standing up.” 

A gasp. “Really? Where?” 

Akaashi gestures for the taller to come closer. When he’s close enough, he licks his hand, and _wipes_ it over Oikawa’s hair, which undoubtedly, took lot of effort, judging by the way his expression twists into something akin to that of horror. 

Instead of fixing it, Akaashi has managed to muss up Oikawa’s hair. He smirks. 

_“Akaashi Keiji,_ you did _not_ mess up my hair.” 

“I believe I just did, Oikawa-san. Don’t you _ever_ fucking do that again. I will dump all of your hair-care products into the toilet bowl.” 

With that, Akaashi stomps off to the bathroom, and slams the door shut. 

Oikawa’s jaw drops. 

“He literally just walked away. He did his damage and left.” Kuroo says. 

“No one needs your commentary, Kuro. Let me borrow your bathroom.” Kenma says.

“What, no please?” 

The blonde saves him a fleeting glance as he picks out his clothes and exits. Kuroo, of course- follows. 

While Oikawa is busy trying to get his life back in order by the mirror, Bokuto situates himself on the floor and watches. A frown makes its way on his face as he wonders when Oikawa and Akaashi could have possible gotten close. 

“Why are you giving me that kicked-puppy look?” 

“Am not!” 

“You are, though. And you’re doing that thing where your legs straighten and tense. Why are you annoyed?” 

“I’m not annoyed.” 

“You’re doing a very poor job at convincing me otherwise.” 

Bokuto huffed. 

“Is it something along the lines off, ‘when did Oikawa and Akaashi become friends?’” Oikawa guesses. 

“Oh come on. You already knew anyway!” 

“I didn’t? I was _clarifying.”_

“Yeah, well. Something like that.” 

“Don’t worry about it, Bo-chan! I’m sure Akaashi will warm up to you soon.” Oikawa leaves out the fact that the freshman already _has._

Akaashi takes that moment to walk into the room, hair damp, and miraculously, is still half-asleep. 

He was wearing his usual skinny jeans and oversized shirt. Bokuto wanted to thank whomever invented turtlenecks at that very moment. 

“I’m pretty sure I just took that shower half-asleep.” Akaashi mutters, situating himself on his bed, right next to Bokuto, who stiffens. 

“Hey, Akaashi! I haven’t seen you all week! How’ve you been?”

“I’ve been alright, Bokuto-san. I hope you’ve been well.” 

Oikawa gives them both a _look._ Suddenly, the ceiling is very interesting to Bokuto. Akaashi pretends not to notice. 

But the furious wiggling of his eyebrows and the glint of mirth in his eyes could hardly be anything _subtle._

“I have a theory.” Oikawa says. “Aka-chan, come here.” 

Akaashi looks suspicious. “I’d rather not.” 

“Come _here.”_

“What does this have anything to do with me?” 

“Do you wear make-up?”

“Sometimes?” 

“Wait here!” Oikawa says, and runs off. 

Akaashi doesn’t know where Oikawa expects him to go. 

Oikawa comes back with eyeliner and a small eye-shadow palette. Kenma, surprisingly, stands nearby. Bokuto’s eyes widen, and Kuroo smirks, knowingly. 

Akaashi closes his eyes, and he feels Oikawa spread something on his eyelids. 

“That looks like-“ Bokuto starts- “ _Jizz?_ I know, right?” and of course, Kuroo finishes the sentence. 

“You’re _both_ disgusting.” 

Akaashi suppresses a laugh through his nose, and settles for a smile. One that only Oikawa and Kenma would see. Oikawa and Kenma freeze at the sight. Who knew Akaashi was so… _gentle?_

Akaashi frowns at the lack of movement, and opens his eyes. “Is there something wrong?” 

“No, no! Everything’s fine! Close your eyes again for me?” Oikawa and Kenma share a look. Did Akaashi ever take the time to actually look at himself? Oikawa  
doesn’t think that the younger boy knows exactly just how _attractive_ he was.

Akaashi feels the brush sweep along his lash-line as Oikawa applied the dark-brown color to frame his eyes. Oikawa thinks brown would make Akaashi’s green eyes look really nice. 

Oikawa continues by placing a darker color on the outer part of his eyes, and asks Akaashi to open his eyes and look up. He brushes the same, dark color on the outer part of his lower lash-line. Once he’s done blending everything together, he takes the eyeliner, and lines Akaashi’s eye-lashes, flicking his wrist slightly. He finishes by adding a pearly-white color on his lower-eyes, towards the inner corner.

Akaashi blinks, wondering what he could possibly looked like, as Oikawa proudly looks at his finished work. Kenma cracks a small smile. 

“I’m 100% sure that you would give someone a boner right now just by looking at them.” Oikawa jokes, which Akaashi frowns at. Afterwards, the brunette turns to Kenma and puts some eyeliner on him.

Akaashi glances at himself through the full body mirror in the corner, and raises an eyebrow. He was pleasantly surprised. He looked pretty good, if he did say so himself.

“I wanna see! Turn around, Akaashi!” Bokuto whines. 

Akaashi does what he’s told, and turns around, looking Bokuto in the eye. 

Bokuto gapes, then turns red. “Um…” He wants to tell Akaashi to turn back around, but then that would be rude.

“Aw. Would you look at that, Bokuto is speechless.” Kuroo teases.

“S-shut up! Y-you, ah- you look good, Akaashi!” 

“Thank you.”

Bokuto was facing an inner meltdown. Because while Akaashi looked good on a regular basis, the make-up just upgraded his whole face by 120%. He had no idea how he would be able to survive today, when he probably couldn’t even look Akaashi in the eye without wanting to implode. Well, he wanted to implode whenever he saw Akaashi in _general,_ and- well. You get the point. 

“Koushi-chan said that him and Daichi already have a date planned out for themselves later on today, so they won’t be joining us.” 

“Aw! That’s too bad, but anyway- what do you guys wanna ride first when we get there? I vote Viking.” Bokuto interjects.

“But the boat won’t be all that heavy so it won’t be as fun. Let’s wait when there are a bit more people.” Kuroo replied.

Akaashi taps Oikawa on his shoulder, and the latter looks surprised. “I need to take my medication.” He whispers, and Oikawa’s eyes widen.

“Hey, why don’t we all grab some breakfast first? I’m starved. Plus, maybe we can save a bit more money this way.” 

Akaashi bows his head in thanks. “You guys go on ahead to the lobby. I just need to grab some things.” 

“Are you sure?” Bokuto , and Akaashi waves him off. 

Once he’s sure that the group is gone, he grabs he takes his pills and puts them in the pillbox. –if someone saw just how many exactly he had to take, they’d  
think the pills would be something else. At the moment, he was on a grand total of 12 different medications. Not including his supplements. He also takes his water bottle with him, along with a bit more extra cash, just in case. He checks to make sure that he has he has his medical bracelet on, which would indicate he was an epileptic if something ever happened, as well as his phone in his pocket. 

He didn’t feel particularly strange today, which he was grateful for. He could usually tell when he’d be getting was seizures. He just hoped that this day wasn’t an absolute disaster. 

He takes the stairs to steps at a time, and sees the group by the entrance, waiting for him. –It was odd to see people waiting for him. 

“How does McDonald’s sound to you all?” Oikawa says. No one disagrees. 

When they get there, Oikawa makes everyone dictate their orders. Akaashi settles for a salad and some chicken nuggets. It takes them about 5 minutes to order. Then, everyone starts handing Oikawa their money, and the whole thing turns into a mess. 

“Wait- how much am I supposed to be giving you?” 

“What did you order?” 

“I’m fucking confused.” 

“Weren’t you supposed to give me 800 yen?” 

“We should just order individually.” 

“We’re going to take too long!” 

Akaashi gets tired. “My order is only 400 yen. Kuroo-san’s is a full meal which is around 720 yen…” He rattles off all the orders along with the prices. “So, what  
you can do, Oikawa-san, is give the cashier 5000 yen, and then we can all just pay you back individually. You should be getting some lose change since the whole order is…” he pauses to add everything mentally. “3950 yen.” 

Kenma blinks at Akaashi. Oikawa looks impressed, and Bokuto is gaping. Kuroo huffs. 

Oikawa is the first to break the silence. “Thanks, Aka-chan! Will you come with me to order? I need someone to help me carry the food. The three of you can go find us a seat.” 

The two of them fall in line. 

“Thank you for a while ago, Oikawa-san. I appreciate it.” 

“Nonsense! I just want this day to be fun. Iwa-chan will be there if anything should happen. -Also, if you look over your shoulder right now, I can guarantee you that Bokuto will, in fact be staring.” 

Akaashi turns his head to the side ever-so-slightly, and glances out of the corner of his eye. Bokuto seemed to be pouting. 

“Make sure to talk to him later, he’s been going off about how much he misses you all throughout practice this week. I thought it was cute. Kuroo wanted him to, and I quote- “shut the fuck up.” I think it was yesterday when Bokuto inhaled and Kuroo just had enough. He said, “Yes, we get it. You miss Akaashi so much, you can’t wait to see him, you’re excited for tomorrow, he’s so amazing, I know. We get it. Please, _enough.”_

Akaashi actually had to let out a laugh at that, and Oikawa doesn’t mention the flush that dusts his face. When they reached the front of the line, they listed off each of their orders and waited for their food to be served. 

Meanwhile, at the table, Bokuto was wondering what the two of them could possibly be talking about. 

“Bo, calm down. They’re probably shit-talking for all we know.” Kuroo sighs, tired of how jittery his friend had been all morning. 

“I know, but like- when did they become so close?” 

“Come on dude, It’s Oikawa. He’s literally so far up Iwaizumi’s ass.” 

“I think you mean the other way around.” 

“Oikawa tops.” 

“In what universe? Have you seen the way Iwaizumi treats Oikawa? He reeks of dom.”

“You’re both barbaric. If you’re so interested, why don’t you just ask him?” Kenma points out. 

“I’d rather not risk Oikawa going on an extra lengthy tangent about how great their sex is. Plus, Iwaizumi would likely clock me into another dimension.” Kuroo says, and laughs when his boyfriend shakes his head in disdain. Bokuto pretends to gag at the lovey-dovey scene in front of him. 

Oikawa pulls out another chair for him to sit in, while Akaashi situates himself next to Bokuto in the booth. Everyone takes their share of the food, and there was an extra meal left behind. 

“Did they mix-up the order or-?” 

Just then, someone pulls out a seat from the other table and lands on it with a loud thud. That answers the question. 

“Yo. Iwaizumi.” Kuroo greets, a lazy smile on his face. Kenma spares the newcomer with a small, “Hi.” 

“Hi, Iwaizumi!” Bokuto accompanies his greeting with a frantic wave of his hand. 

Iwaizumi nods, until his eyes land on Akaashi. “You must be Akaashi. Nice meeting you.” 

“You too.” 

“What, no greeting for me?” Oikawa teases, and Iwaizumi shuts him up by a quick peck on the lips. 

To Akaashi’s surprise, Oikawa turns bright red. Iwaizumi brushes it off. Bokuto snickers beside him. Afterwards they all begin eating. 

Akaashi notices how Bokuto doesn’t seem to be talking very much. He pushes the box of chicken nuggets near Bokuto. “Would you like one, Bokuto-san?” 

Bokuto startles from his food, nearly dropping the burger. “S-sure!” 

He gingerly takes one from the box, and Akaashi takes the box back. “Is something wrong? You don’t seem as enthusiastic as usual.” 

“Nope! I’m good now.” 

“All you wanted was a chicken nugget?” 

“Something like that.” Bokuto smiles at him, and Akaashi feels the back of his neck warm. He turns back to his food, and hurriedly shoves the last of his salad into his mouth. He sees Bokuto smile even wider from his peripheral. Oh dear. 

They finish up the rest of their food, and Akaashi cleans up after Bokuto, -ignoring his protests- placing it on the tray for him to dispose of. They get to the subway, and wait for the train. It was still early, so there wasn’t much people waiting on the platform. Akaashi made sure no one was looking when he took at his pillbox and picked out his pills. He pops half of the pills into his mouth- his morning meds, - and chases it down with the water. He winces when he feels them drag against his throat. 

He drinks more water, and nearly spits it everywhere when he sees Iwaizumi and Oikawa watching. The other three remained oblivious, thankfully. The couple walks over to where Akaashi is standing. 

“Do they know?” Iwaizumi quietly asks, and Akaashi shakes his head no. 

Iwaizumi gives him a pointed look, which Akaashi shrugs at.

“What kind of epilepsy?”

Akaashi blinks. Oh my _god._

Of course, there were different kinds of epilepsy. Perhaps, he didn’t have to quite tell them after all. They didn’t need to know he was critically ill, with his life ebbing away. He could just say that he had the common type of epilepsy. Akaashi almost hits himself, because of course people wouldn’t have textbook knowledge about the different kinds of epilepsy. 

Unless of course you were a med-student. 

Iwaizumi waves a hand over Akaashi’s face, bringing him out of his daze. Iwaizumi sighs in relief. “Thank fuck, I thought you were seizing.” He mutters.

Oikawa gasps. “ _What?_ He could be having a seizure and no one would know?”

“Yeah. And you didn’t answer my question, Akaashi.” 

“Idiopathic Generalized Epilepsy.” It was a common type of epilepsy. It surely didn’t include gradual neurogical decay. 

Iwaizumi squints like he doesn’t quite believe what he’s saying. He may not be like Oikawa, who could immediately tell if someone were lying or not, but he could just _tell._ Akaashi was lying. Possibly a doctor’s (a soon-to-be, anyway) instinct.

Then, the train arrives. Akaashi thanks the Lord. Iwaizumi was making him sweat. 

“Akaashi!” Bokuto calls out, gesturing for him to come closer. The train screeches to a stop in front of them, and the cars are empty. Bokuto’s hand wraps around Akaashi’s wrist, and he tugs the latter along. Akaashi lets himself be dragged to a seat, and they sit down next to each other on the left side of the train. Kuroo stands, Kenma sits down, and Oikawa and Iwaizumi situate themselves across them. 

Akaashi twists his wrist, and Bokuto lets go. 

“So! How’s your week been?” 

“Uneventful. How about you?” 

“Practice has been grueling! On top of that, I had 3 templates due this week. Plus the sketches I’ve had to hand in, I don’t think I’ve slept properly in the last few  
days!” As Bokuto says this, Akaashi turns to look at the other boy. It’s then that he notices the bruises underneath his eyes, and how his skin lacks its usual glow. 

“That’s awful.” The train stops. They’ve arrived at another station. 

Bokuto speaks over the sound of the doors opening. “I’m okay! I think… plus Oikawa really wanted to go today, and I didn’t want to disappoint him, he was really excited. And seeing you always makes me feel better, so…” 

Akaashi looks away as Bokuto says that, favoring the buildings outside. He hopes his ears aren’t red. He feels Bokuto shift beside him, and a minute later, an earphone is being handed to him. There was also a part of him that thought it was ridiculous that he would do something for the sake of someone else. Especially over something so trivial.

Just how far did Bokuto’s selflessness go?

“Wanna listen? You can play your favorites while you’re at it.” 

Instead of taking Bokuto’s phone, he takes out his own. Bokuto plugs in the earphones, and helps himself to the left side. 

Akaashi leans back in his seat, and scrolls through his playlist. He choose Mozart’s  Ronda Allo Turca.  Bokuto moves a bit closer. Akaashi tries to ignore it.

Akaashi notices that Bokuto is warm. Like, _really_ warm. He was like a furnace. Akaashi wonders if Bokuto’s warm personality has anything to do with the warmth he was emitting. He closes his eyes, and focuses on the music. The chords and the sounds, the way the sound carried-

He feels a weight on his shoulder. He winks one eye open, and sees Bokuto resting his head on his shoulder. His eyes were closed. He tries to move his shoulder, but Bokuto just ends up getting even more comfortable, snuggling his head into the crook of Akaashi’s neck. He gives up trying to get him off.

He lets Bokuto sleep on his shoulder, feeling bad that he hasn’t gotten a proper rest. He figures that the sophomore would need it this day.  
Akaashi hears the sound of a camera going off. He sees Oikawa clutching his phone, smiling devilishly. He glares. 

“Delete that if you care about your blow-dryer.” 

Oikawa blanks. Hurriedly, he sends it to Bokuto before turning his phone around for Akaashi to see him ‘deleting it.’

Akaashi squints, suspicious, and Oikawa sighs. 

Iwaizumi pulls Oikawa’s head down onto his shoulder, and the brunette yelps. “Take a nap, we won’t arrive for another hour. You’re probably just as tired as he is.” Oikawa lets out a happy hum, and does what he’s told, wrapping his arms around Iwaizumi’s own, and snuggles his head comfortably in the crook of his boyfriend’s neck. 

Bokuto shifts, and Akaashi makes a surprised sound. His hair tickles. The train turns into another track, and Bokuto almost falls forward if not for Akaashi gently pushing his head back onto his shoulder. He resituates himself underneath the taller boy, keeping a gentle hand on his forehead to keep him from falling. When he looks up, Kuroo is looking at him with a shit-eating grin. Kenma has paused his game to look at the two. 

“What?” Akaashi says, and remains calm. He feels his eye twitch. 

Kuroo shakes his head, still smiling. “Nothing.” 

Akaashi chooses to ignore him, and closes his eyes once more. 

 

“Hurry, before they wake up!” Oikawa says, not so quietly. 

“Oikawa, _you’re_ going to wake them up.” 

Kuroo snaps a photo just before Akaashi’s eyes flutter open. 

“Morning, sleeping beauty. Wake your prince up, we’re almost there.” 

Akaashi realizes he had fallen asleep on top of Bokuto. He reels, and hits his head on the window. “Ow!” 

The other four quietly laugh. 

Akaashi, nudges Bokuto with his elbow. “Bokuto-san. Wake-up.” The older boy grunts, and snuggles up to Akaashi even more, if that were possible. Akaashi wants to scream. He shoves him. 

Bokuto falls forward, and Akaashi is too slow. 

Akaashi muffles a yelp into his hands. Bokuto jolts awake, sitting up. “I’m awake!” 

Akaashi crouches, ignoring the stares from the other passengers nearby. “Bokuto-san, are you alright? I’m so sorry! You wouldn’t wake up and so I opted to nudge you but it might have been too hard, I’m-“ 

“It’s fine! I’m fine.” 

Akaashi helps him up. He doesn’t mention the soreness of his shoulder. 

The train stops, and Akaashi stumbles. Bokuto catches him by the elbows, and steadies him. Akaashi is about to thank him but Bokuto… well was, Bokuto, and he was staring rather intently. Their faces were a few inches apart. 

The whole thing just seemed like a scene out of a movie, and it was so incredibly cliché that Akaashi had to ask, _why him?_

Oikawa, Iwaizumi, Kuroo, and Kenma, are watching the whole scenario pan out before them, amused. Kuroo clears his throat as the train doors push open. 

Bokuto and Akaashi break out of their little daze, and step away from each other. 

“Okay, you all need to pay me back now, except for you. Iwa-chan-“ 

Akaashi gives Oikawa his money, or at least, tries to. Bokuto shoves his hand away and pays for both their share of food. Akaashi protests, and Bokuto just cuts him off. If there was one thing he learned about being friends with Bokuto, it’s that he’s unbelievably stubborn. Especially when it comes to things that he really wants to do. (He wants to do Akaashi, but, Anyway- you get the point.) 

“Bokuto-san, you don’t need to do that.” 

“But I want to!”

“Okay, can you two stop flirting for one fucking moment because we need to buy the tickets.” Kuroo says, effectively shutting the both of them up.

“I think It’ll be fine if we end up buying the tickets individually this time. It’s more practical.” 

“We can go in pairs!” Oikawa suggests. 

Obviously, Akaashi would be left with Bokuto, since the other four are dating. 

Oikawa and Iwaizumi end up being the first to get their tickets, then Kuroo and Kenma. When Bokuto and Akaashi finally get their tickets, the rest of the group is nowhere to be seen. 

Akaashi panics internally, because not only has he been left alone with Bokuto, but the other boy has no idea of his medical condition. He thinks, it’s totally not unlike Oikawa to leave them alone. Akaashi curses himself for getting involved with such crafty people. If he dies, he dies. Hopefully, Oikawa could live with the fact that it had likely been his fault. 

“Well, it looks like you’re stuck with me!” Bokuto announces, and Akaashi tries not to cringe. 

“Looks like I am.” 

“Don’t worry about it! I’ll take care of you.” Bokuto’s hand wraps around Akaashi’s wrist for the 2nd time that day, and Akaashi feels his palms start to sweat. 

“What do you wanna ride first?” 

“Um, I’ve actually… never been to an amusement park before. So…” 

Bokuto abruptly comes to a halt, and steps close to Akaashi. _”Akaashi._ You’ve never been to an amusement before?” 

“No… is it really that big of a surprise, Bokuto-san?” 

“Well… everyone’s been to an amusement park at one point! If this is your first time, I’ll make sure you have a great time!” 

Akaashi nods stiffly, not accustomed to the contact. Bokuto leans into his face, and Akaashi bends backward. 

_”You_ need to loosen up a bit.” There was something teasing in the way Bokuto was looking at him. It made his breath catch in his throat. Once Bokuto finally gives him some space, Akaashi lets out a breath, relieved. –However, there was nothing he could do to calm his heart. Bokuto gives Akaashi’s arm a little tug, and they fall into step besides one another. They line-up for one of the rollercoasters. 

“So, what’s up with you and Oikawa?” 

“How subtle of you, Bokuto-san.” Akaashi says, mildly uncomfortable.

“No! Not like that, I’m just wonderin’ when you two got so close n’ stuff, like I’ve never seen you two talk-“ 

“It’s okay Bokuto-san. And Oikawa-san and I are just friends… the situation… well let’s just say I wouldn’t be standing next to you right now, if I didn’t end up  
talking to Oikawa-san.” 

“So, I have him to thank for that, right?” Bokuto says, and flashes a smile bright enough to make plants grow. 

Akaashi has to let out an actual laugh at that, because if he knew the circumstances, he _would not_ be saying that. “I suppose so.” 

Bokuto looks at him with stars in his eyes, and slips his hand down so that it covers Akaashi’s own. 

The line moves forward. Akaashi surprises himself by starting up the next conversation. “Anything interesting happen at practice this week?” 

The look Bokuto gives Akaashi is so full of… adoration? Was he all that enthused that Akaashi had initiated the conversation?

“No, not really.”

“Really, Oikawa-san told me quite a bit a while ago.”

Akaashi watches as Bokuto’s eyes widen. “Um. What exactly, did he say?” 

“Well, he might have mentioned something about you talking about...” 

“You?” 

“Simply put, yes. I’m sorry Kuroo-san had to suffer through that.” 

Bokuto throws his head backwards, and groans loudly, attracting a few onlookers. “Why do they hate me?” 

Akaashi chuckles. “Am I really something to miss, Bokuto-san? Quite frankly, I think I’m rather boring.” 

“Don’t say that! You aren’t boring, plus I don’t care what you do- you listen to my mindless chatter, and that’s enough.” 

“What could possibly be interesting about me?” 

“Everything! I won’t stop until I figure out everything about you. Though, I think that’s impossible, you always surprise me.” 

Bokuto says it so casually, and Akaashi wonders if he knows what it feels like to be embarrassed. 

They arrive at the front of the line, and sit down in one of the carts. Bokuto first, followed by Akaashi. Once everyone is secured, the employees wave goodbye,  
and cart starts to climb. Akaashi covers his face with his hands, and hears Bokuto hollering in the background. 

“Oh my god.” He mutters, his hands still clasped over his face as the people in front start to scream. He can barely make out Bokuto scream, “Akaashi!” Before the other boy quickly pulls away one of his hands on his face and actually _holds it,_ this time. Akaashi barely registers it before a scream is ripped from his throat as the cart drops. He feels his heart drop with it. 

He clasps his free hand over his mouth, and feels Bokuto pull his arm up above his hand. Bokuto is laughing loudly besides him. 

The next part is a sharp turn, and Akaashi lets out a squeak. He’s surprising himself by making sounds he’s never made before, it was kind of mortifying. 

Sooner or later, he lets himself scream when the cart drops- he, closes his eyes, laughs, and raises his arms above his head. He sees Bokuto laughing along with him out of the corner of his eye. The cart comes to an abrupt stop, and Akaashi braces an arm out in front of him, winking his eye open. 

Him and Bokuto look at one another, and start laughing. –Akaashi’s more subdued. 

Bokuto stops laughing before Akaashi does. The younger boy’s cheeks are flushed a rosy color, and he catches a glimpse of a dimple. He had a gentle smile on his face, and his hair was a _mess._ Oh god, and his laugh was quite possibly the most beautiful thing he had ever heard aside from when he heard Akaashi play the piano. 

If Kuroo were there, he’d probably be making some comment about how disgusting the look on Bokuto’s face was.

The handlebars are released, and Bokuto steps out first, helping Akaashi out afterwards. 

They stumble the first few steps, their legs wobbly, but they find themselves constantly reaching out to steady one another. Bokuto thinks Akaashi’s smile is the only thing that matters in the world. 

Akaashi realizes that he has yet to let go of Bokuto’s hand, but he also finds that he doesn’t really want to, either. He makes a decision for himself. 

Today, Akaashi decides, that for once in his life, he’s going to let himself have fun. 

Akaashi points to the freefall ride nearby. “Bokuto-san, let’s ride that one next.” 

 

They spend the whole day lining up and riding the attractions. At some point, Akaashi tells Bokuto that he needs to go to the bathroom. Bokuto feels his phone  
ding in his pocket. His screen lights up with a message from Oikawa. 

**from: freak  
So, Bokuto! Are you two having fun? ヽ(・∀・)ﾉ **

**to: freak  
Yea!!! Fuck u guys tho u left me along w/ him **

**from: freak  
Are you complaining? (^_~) (≧◡≦) **

**to: freak  
Well, no . **

**from: freak  
That’s what I thought!!! ☆*:.｡.o(≧▽≦)o.｡.:*☆ anyway, do you guys wanna meet up and eat dinner 2 gether since we didn’t get any lunch,, or do you wanna be left alone? ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) **

**to: freak  
You’re so obnoxious i hate u a lot **

**from: freak  
Thanks, Bo-chan! ＼(⌒▽⌒) **

**to: freak  
Ok he’s comin back from his bathroom break I’ll ask him real quick **

**to: freak  
oh and thank u for that picture u took earlier, i feel blessed **

Akaashi was wiping his hands on his pants when he gets back, and his cheeks were still looking a little flushed from the rides. But his hair wasn’t such a mess anymore, which was a shame. Bokuto thought it was cute. 

“You’re back! ‘Kawa is asking if we wanna join them for dinner.” 

“I don’t mind.” 

“Let’s go!” Bokuto subconsciously takes Akaashi’s hand as they walk away from the bathroom, texting on his phone.

Akaashi’s feelings of guilt settled low in his stomach, and somewhere at the back of his mind there was a thought gnawing on him. While he’s never had this  
much fun in his life, he just felt so… _selfish._

_“Onii, when will you learn to be selfish? Just this once. You’re in college now. People are different there…”_

I wouldn’t have to feel so conflicted about this situation if I just stayed away in the first place. But _nope._ He just had to go and let Bokuto tag along. It  
was scaring Akaashi how easily Bokuto had him wrapped around his finger, and the growing warmth in his chest was getting more and more difficult to ignore, the more time he spends with Bokuto. 

“Hey, are you okay? Are you having fun?” Bokuto is looking at him, concerned. 

“I’m great, Bokuto-san. Believe it or not, I’ve never had this much fun in my life.” Akaashi says, a hint of a smile on the corners of his mouth.

Bokuto has to laugh at that, because Akaashi says it with the straightest face possible. “I’m glad to hear that.” 

And the way Bokuto says, it- it was so _genuine_ and _honest,_ Akaashi wanted the ground to open up and swallow him whole, but at the same  
time he didn’t want to be anywhere else. It has Akaashi’s throat feeling tight.

Who knew liking someone was such a whirlwind.

It doesn’t register to Akaashi that he just inwardly admitted that he liked Bokuto. It was probably best if he didn’t, either. But well, if his little piano recital the other day say _something_ about how he felt towards Bokuto. 

Akaashi catches sight of Kuroo’s rooster hair, and he hears the familiar lilt of Oikawa’s voice nearby. 

They all meet in the middle, and it feels like some kind of scene from a show. Akaashi finds that this whole day feels like a production number.

“Great! Everyone’s here! Where do you guys wanna eat?” Oikawa is the first to speak. 

“Can we not stay in the middle? It feels weird.” Kenma says. 

“Aw, I thought it added to the effect!” 

“ _What_ effect?” Iwaizumi’s gruff voice says. 

“I don’t know! But if Ken-chan wants to, let’s move.” They all move to the side, then they talk. 

“I want pizza!” 

“We came all the way to an amusement park for pizza?” 

“Well, what do you have in mind?” 

“I want a burger.” 

“How original.” 

“It’s food? Can’t we all just get on with it?” 

They all look at Akaashi who hasn’t said a word. It wasn’t like he was allowed to eat any of the food they were mentioning. Honestly. 

“I’m fine with anything.” 

They all groan. 

“There was a retro looking place somewhere near the ferris-wheel earlier, why don’t we check that out? They’d probably have burgers. Or pizza. Whichever you prefer.” 

The six of them start walking with Akaashi in the lead, Bokuto is trailing nearby, presumably next to Kuroo. Akaashi can almost _feel_ Oikawa smirking. 

“I saw you two.” Oikawa murmurs, low enough for Akaashi to hear. 

Akaashi raises an eyebrow out of the corner of his eye towards Iwaizumi. “I expected more from you, Iwaizumi-san.” 

Iwaizumi stutters. “I-it was his idea!” 

“Don’t bring Iwa-chan into this!” 

Akaashi rolls his eyes. “And?” 

“You were looking pretty cozy, if I do say so myself.” 

“By, “I saw you,” does this entail Kuroo-san and Kenma-san as well?” 

“Maybe.” 

“Quite frankly I’m disappointed.” Akaashi shakes his head. 

“Oh, stop! You were actually enjoying yourself! What a sight to see.”

“I didn’t want to make Bokuto-san feel uncomfortable.” 

“You were thinking of him? That’s _so_ sweet.”

“You left me behind with him, _alone,_ Oikawa-san. I would have thought you would be a lot smarter and considerate towards the both of us.” 

“Oh, but come on! The both of you had already talked a few times, what’s the big deal?” 

_The big deal is that by doing that, you’ve probably made me like Bokuto even more, and I don’t like it._ “Look, Oikawa-san. I’m not very good with people. Please don’t put me on the spot like that, ever again.” 

With that, Akaashi strides forward and pushes the doors open, his mood dampened slightly. Not that anyone could really tell.

That aside, Akaashi blanks upon seeing the menu, seeing as there was virtually nothing he was allowed to eat. 

Well, it _has_ been a while since he’s had meat, but the last time he had eaten a proper burger was probably… when he still had friends. Which was  
actually… around 2 and a half years ago. 

“Are you having a hard time comprehending the menu, Akaashi?” Kuroo remarks, which Akaashi has to snort at, considering what he was saying would come true  
one day. 

Akaashi shivers upon the idea of him being incapable of doing the simplest tasks. 

“Well?” 

Akaashi says his order, deciding that it was either go big or go home, and opts for a relatively unhealthy sounding burger, along with a side of large fries and a  
milk shake.

His order definitely didn’t follow the restriction Dr. Ukai had given him of high-fat low carb. But, oh well. It was one time, what harm could it do? 

He catches Iwaizumi looking at him, in disagreement. Akaashi shrugs. He wasn’t _not_ going to eat. 

Iwaizumi casually makes his way next to Akaashi, then mumbles. “Are you supposed to be eating that?” 

“Probably not.” Akaashi smirks, then slips away to slide into one of the booths. Iwaizumi follows, sitting across him. 

“I know you weren’t telling the truth earlier.” 

“But I was.” 

“Oikawa can be an impulsive liar. I know a lie when I hear one, Akaashi-kun. I may not be studying psychology like he is, nor am I nearly as perceptive as he is,  
but I’ve picked up a few things.” 

Akaashi blinks. “I wasn’t lying.” 

Iwaizumi squints. Oikawa slides in next to him a few moments later. 

“Hey, I’m really sorry if I made you uncomfortable earlier. That wasn’t my intention at all.” Oikawa frowns, and this is one of the few times that Akaashi can tell  
that Oikawa is sincere. He waves him off. 

“Hey, could you tell if Akaashi was lying earlier?” 

“Hm? Well of course I could, he took far too long to answer and refused to elaborate.” 

Was Akaashi really that bad at lying? Perhaps he was out of practice. 

“I know for a fact that your prescriptions are one too many just for it to be Idiopathic.”

Akaashi doesn’t mean to be rude, _honestly._ But Iwaizumi was prodding a bit too much for their first meeting. “Pay more attention, Iwaizumi-san. If you’re aiming to be a doctor, I would think that something as simple as this would be easy.” 

Oikawa scowls at Akaashi. “Hey. Fuck off, Akaashi. Med-school isn’t some joke, it’s extremely demanding, but I’m assuming you wouldn’t know anything about that since everything has been handed out to you on a god damn silver spoon, so shut up-“ the sheer malice in his voice may or may not have caused the hairs on Akaashi’s body to rise, but he’s said too much by the time Iwaizumi cuts him off. 

A silver spoon? Oikawa had no fucking _idea._

“ _Tooru._ That’s enough. It’s fine- I’m sorry, Akaashi-kun, I overstepped my bounds.” 

Akaashi can’t help but mutter, “No shit.” 

Oikawa looks _livid._ “You’re being _supremely_ difficult, _Akaashi._ I’m beginning to think that this whole ordeal was a mista-“ “We come with food!” 

The three of them look at Bokuto, whose arms are sporting trays filled with their lunch. It was either Bokuto didn’t sense the aura, or he was choosing to ignore it. Whatever it was, Oikawa fixes his façade, and flashes a tight smile. 

“Great! I’m hungry.” 

Akaashi can’t help but think, ‘good. I’ve managed to push you away.’ But there was also a heaviness in his chest that he hadn’t felt before. Funny, he had been  
thinking for a while that his heart was maybe just a devoid space in his chest. 

Bokuto sets the plate of greasy food before him, and Akaashi recoils slightly. But after all, he did pay for it- and he wasn’t going to prove Iwaizumi’s point any further. 

Akaashi sprays some alcohol on his hands under the table, and Bokuto taps his wrist, saying “Can I have?” He wordlessly passes it to the older boy, and before he knows it, his hand sanitizer had circulated around the table. 

Iwaizumi gently sets is down before him. Akaashi doesn’t look at Iwaizumi as he puts it back in his bag. 

Iwaizumi doesn’t ignore the sound of the familiar rattle of a pill box. 

_”Itadakimasu!_ the four of them say, and they all dive into their food. 

Contrary to popular belief, Bokuto wasn’t that oblivious. He could tell when something was wrong, and while he may not necessarily know what it is  
specifically, he chooses to act as he normally would. Because as someone usually so bright and energetic, it was hard not to notice a shift in his demeanor. So, as 

Bokuto is still, you know- _being Bokuto,_ this is when he tends to notice things, or how he chooses to observe other people.

Besides, he has his own way of going about things. Even though he isn’t choosing to speak upon it, he tends to act on it instead. 

“Where did you guys go?” Bokuto says through a mouthful of food. 

“Around, obviously.” Oikawa says, a matter-of-factly as he shoves a spoonful of curry into his mouth. 

“They were following us around, Bokuto-san. Isn’t it obvious?” Akaashi says.

Bokuto is _actually_ surprised and chokes on his sprite. Kuroo whacks Bokuto’s back a couple of times, Oikawa continues eating while Iwaizumi actually has the decency to look guilty. 

Akaashi takes a bit out of his burger and has to hold in a moan that threatened to leave his body. Jesus fuck. He loved burgers. Too bad they could potentially end him, but well. You know, who cares. 

“What have you guys managed to ride so far?” 

Oikawa’s answer is immediate. “Iwa-chan!” 

Akaashi stops eating and stares blankly at the space above Iwaizumi’s head. Bokuto and Kuroo laugh aloud. Kenma shakes his head in disdain. 

“I hate you all.” Kenma says, which makes Kuroo and Bokuto laugh even harder. 

“For once, Shittykawa, can you not use your dick to think?” 

“Ah, but Iwa-chan, I’m not Oikawa Tooru without the innuendos, am I? Besides, you love them anyway. I heard you huff in an attempt to hide your amusement.” 

“We’re eating!” 

“I thought all topics were welcome on the dinner table?” 

“Eat your fucking food.” 

Akaashi shakes his head and continues eating his burger in quiet happiness. Kuroo had been watching from the corner of the booth, and notices the slight shift  
in the raven’s mood. It’s something he knows all-too-well from being with Kenma all the time. Barely noticeable, but there.

Speaking of Kenma, he looked perfectly content with his ramen, his cheeks a little pink from the steam coming from the bowl. Kenma notices him staring. Kuroo smiles, a genuine smile. Kenma rolls his eyes. 

Akaashi quietly watches from the corner. He hates to admit that the whole exchange was actually amusing. And surprisingly enough he gives a second-thought to the way he was acting earlier. Why does he feel bad? Since when has he ever felt the need to apologize for the way he was acting? Wasn’t he like that normally? 

Fuck, was he really that much of a dick? But the regular Akaashi would just brush it off, wouldn’t he? So why, _why_ did he feel that way? 

Was a part of him actually… starting to consider these people as his friends? Honestly, fuck the natural needs of a human being. Why did he randomly start thinking that he _liked_ hanging out with them? 

Not only that, but Oikawa had been nothing but nice to him this entire week. Shit, he planned this whole thing. If It weren’t for Oikawa he wouldn’t have been- 

Enjoying himself. With Bokuto. It’s Oikawa’s fault as to why he has to feel guilty- 

No. One of the thing he hated was when people liked to make excuses for the decisions that they make for themselves. No, he wanted to be here. He chose to go on his own account. He recalls when Oikawa says that inviting him may or may not have been a mistake, and he actually _feels_ his heart skip a beat. And not in the good way. 

Akaashi has to refrain from pushing his palms into his eyes.-Caring what other people thought was so _tiring._

A loud clap in front of his face distracts him from his thoughts, and he looks around the table to find that everyone was staring at him. Iwaizumi looked just about ready to jump over the table. Oikawa looked like he was about to cry. That made Akaashi feel even _more_ bad. 

“Sorry, what were you saying?”

“We were asking you if you were ready to go.” Kenma quietly pipes. 

Akaashi is flustered. “R-right. Yeah, I’m fine.” 

“You sure?” Iwaizumi presses. Akaashi nods. 

“I’m good. We can go now.” Akaashi says, turning his body and gesturing for Kenma to slide out of the booth. Once they’re all standing Akaashi checks one last  
time to make sure no one has left anything behind. The other five of them exit.

There’s a wallet, on the floor, suspiciously thick. He picks it up and opens it, and Akaashi finds out why. It was one of those wallets with the picture inserts, and when Akaashi opens it, all of the picture inserts fall open. Majority of the pictures were Kenma, with a few having Bokuto or Oikawa and a few other people he wasn’t familiar with.- A blonde boy with glasses, and someone with a stern face. A few of them have found their way to the floor. The whole thing just seemed very intimate and it was probably something he wasn’t supposed to be seeing. 

With nimble fingers, he picks up the pictures on the floor, careful not to crinkle any of them. He folds up the inserts, trying not to look at anything for too long. 

He had to admit that the thought seemed very sweet. 

Akaashi turns around, and Kuroo busts through the door once more, looking panicked. He stomps over to where he’s standing. Akaashi holds out his his hand  
for him to take. 

“Oh, thank god. I thought I lost it.”

“You didn’t, here you are.” 

He takes it from Akaashi, and Kuroo freezes. Akaashi looks at him in confusion. “You didn’t… open it did you?” 

“If it makes you feel better, let’s just say I didn’t.”

“My image has been ruined.” Kuroo whispers, and shakes his head as he shamefully puts his wallet back in his pocket. 

“I didn’t know you had an image to uphold.” 

“I’m a star volleyball player.” 

“I see.” They exit together, and everyone is waiting for them outside.

Akaashi bites back a laugh. Kuroo’s true colors just shone through. 

“Why does Aka-chan look like he just discovered something?” Oikawa points it out. 

Kuroo’s eyes widen and Akaashi humors him by looking him straight in the eye. “I didn’t.” When no one was looking, Akaashi pointedly looks at Kuroo. 

“Hey, can we just sit down for a bit? I feel like if we ride something now I’ll end up projectile vomiting.” Kenma says, and everyone agrees. 

Iwaizumi keeps trying to make eye-contact with Akaashi and he still feels really bad. He finally manages to look him in the eye. He nods his head subtle-y. 

Whatever that meant. 

“Who wants gum?” Kuroo offers, and passes around the pack. 

They all take one. Akaashi pops a stick in his mouth and chews for a moment before blowing a bubble. He hears Oikawa gasp. ‘

“What? No fair! I have never managed to blow a bubble in my entire life.” 

“It’s fine, I’m sure you’ve managed to blow something else.” Kuroo waves him off. Bokuto makes a sound of agreement.

“Enough.” Iwaizumi says, looking just about done.

“How have you not managed to learn it?” 

“I don’t know, Iwa-chan tried to teach me but if never worked. He’s a shit teacher.” 

“Hey, you’re just that incompetent.” 

“But you’ve managed to teach me other things perfectly fine, right Iwa-chan?” 

Iwazumi glares at him. Oikawa high-fives with Kuroo. 

“I could manage to learn if _someone_ just explained it properly.” 

“I can try teaching you.” 

Oikawa looks at him, surprised. “Would you?” His voice turned soft. It kind of sounded like he was apologizing.

With a nod, Akaashi said, “Sure.” 

“I’d like to see you try, Akaashi-kun. I’ve done everything to try and teach him and it never works.” 

“We’ve all, tried teaching him- actually. Even I have.” Kenma says.

Akaashi tries to think of an appropriate way to explain it to someone like Oikawa. “Hm… maybe think of it like a condom?” 

Kuroo almost chokes. Kenma makes a sound of surprise. Iwaizumi looks at him in horror. Oikawa actually looks like he’s imagining it. 

“Flatten the piece of gum against the roof of your mouth first, like this.” He pauses to execute it, then he sticks his tongue out for Oikawa to see.  
Oikawa follows a moment after, then sticks his tongue out as well. “That’s good, and then- slide it over your tongue- make sure it’s really thin. Like this, see?” 

He does that as well, and Oikawa follows. 

“This is the tricky part, you kind of have to hold the piece between your lips and then pull it back a bit so that there’s a little space that you could blow air into.” Akaashi blows a bubble, and holds his breath as Oikawa tries a moment later. 

It’s small at first, and Oikawa’s hand shoots out to grab Iwaizumi’s arm, eyes wide. Gently, he tries to blow a bit more air. They all hold their breath, as the bubble slowly grows, then pops. 

It was a mess. Bokuto was yelling, shaking Oikawa, “YOU DID IT! YOU ACTUALLY MANAGED TO DO IT!” And Kuroo was just screaming “OHHHHHHH!” In the background, Iwaizumi was outraged that Akaashi had managed to teach him so easily. Kenma stood up and walked a good distance away. It looked like a scene from some white vine. 

The chaos was embarrassing, yet oddly fulfilling. 

“Iwaizumi-san, I think you might want to readjust your pants.” 

“Are you seriously half-hard from Oikawa blowing a bubble?” Bokuto cries.

“All of you shut the fuck up!” 

 

After that, they all start walking around, Kenma refusing to walk too close to any of them in fear of humiliation. Kuroo trails behind, attempting to apologize. Bokuto has resumed to holding Akaashi’s hand, ignoring Oikawa’s frantic whispers behind them.

“Hey, are you okay? You were looking pretty spaced out earlier.” 

“Yeah, sorry. I was thinking.” 

“You do that a lot. I wonder what goes on in there.” He nods towards Akaashi’s head. 

“Well, what do you think goes on in there?” 

“I don’t know. I can’t really say. You don’t talk much.” 

Akaashi looks at him guiltily. “I apologize if I seem rude, Bokuto-san.” 

“W-what? No! It’s fine. Can I just say something though?” 

“Go ahead.” 

“You uh, look really… sad. All the time. Or like, tired. And I don’t know if it’s college or if it’s something personal but I… I really hope I could have eased a little bit of your worries… today.” 

_Kind of impossible when you guys are the cause of my worries, but anyway._ “Thank you. For your concern. And I needed today. I haven’t really… well I haven’t been thinking of myself, recently. And I think, It’s time I have.” 

Akaashi doesn’t ask for help, but he doesn’t say no to it, either. And I guess, in some way- Oikawa, Bokuto- they were both willing to actually stick with Akaashi. 

He hopes that’s still the case when they find out what’s wrong, or why he is, the way he is. He hopes that his condition doesn’t take away this- this feeling, just like it did with so many other things. 

He was going to learn to trust these people, and he was just praying that his efforts wouldn’t go to waste. 

“Aka-chan, stop spacing out, it makes Iwa-chan antsy as hell and I don’t like it.” Oikawa whispers, waving a hand in front of his face. 

“Right. Sorry. I have a lot going on in my head.” 

“Clearly.” Oikawa says, and they let it sink in for a moment, knowing what the other was meaning to say. At the same time, they say, “Sorry.” They look at each other before laughing. –Or, Oikawa laughed, and Akaashi hid a smile like he usually did. 

“I’m sorry for what I said earlier, I didn’t mean it.” 

“I know you didn’t. And I’m sorry, Iwaizumi-san, I didn’t mean to be so brash.” Akaashi bends forward slightly to be able to look at him. 

Iwaizumi looks startled, and starts blushing as he shakes his head and waves his hand. “No, no, It’s my fault. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have pried. But, just know that you can trust us, okay?” 

“Oh come on, Iwa-chan. We’re all going to have to gain his trust. Aka-chan has been through a lot.” 

“Right.” 

“I uh, I have something to say.” Akaashi says, making everyone stop, including Kuroo and Kenma. Oikawa’s eyes widen. He looks at Akaashi as if to ask, ‘are you telling them?’ Akaashi shakes his head no. 

“Okay, uh. How do I say this? I’m not very good with emotions.” He clears his throat. “I know, that, I haven’t been the nicest, in the short period that you’ve known me.- frankly put, I’m an absolute dick- um, especially to you, Kuroo-san- and I haven’t the slightest clue as to how Bokuto-san and Oikawa-san have put up with me. And I, uh, I have a reason for that, and I will, actually tell you all, when I’m ready. I hope that when that time comes that, you all won’t waste my efforts in deciding to trust you,

But I’m extremely grateful for today, and I hope I didn’t ruin anything for any of you. And I just-“ He closes his eyes and takes a deep breath, and bows. “Thank you for having me!” 

“You’re so cordial it pains me. But it’s fine, dude. I appreciate that you apologized. Besides, you’re actually pretty funny.” Kuroo says. A genuine smile on his face. 

“You help me with my calculus homework and I can’t thank you enough for that.” Kenma says, quietly. 

“You cook really good food.” Oikawa points out. 

“Like I said earlier, you listen to what I have to say, and that’s enough.” Bokuto’s voice is surprisingly gentle. 

“I haven’t really known you all that long, but you don’t seem as bad as you make yourself out to be.- And I’m a pretty good judge of character, If I do say so myself.” Iwaizumi shrugs.

“And yet, here you are- dating someone like me.” Oikawa teases. But there was an underlying honesty to his words. 

“What do you mean? Didn’t I just say that I was a good judge of character?” Iwaizumi says it so casually and so nonchalantly that it takes everyone by surprise. 

Iwaizumi looks at all of them. “What?”

“Iwa-chan, I love you.” Oikawa breathes. 

“God, your PDA is terrible.” Kuroo gags. 

“You know what’d be funny? If we rode the ferris-wheel. It’ll be like a scene from like, every romantic movie, ever.” Oikawa looks at Kuroo pointedly, his eyes flicking towards Bokuto and Akaashi. 

Kuroo makes an exaggerated, “Ohhh, yeah we should definitely do that.” 

Bokuto looks at Akaashi. “Are you up for it?” 

“Was that meant to be a pun, Bokuto-san?” 

He gasps. “I didn’t even realize that!” 

Bokuto was so pure and needed to be protected. “I’m not against it,” 

“Let’s all go, then!” So, they journey towards the said ride, and it’s a twenty minute wait. 

They all groan. 

“I guess we don’t have a choice, bummer. –And Aka-chan, really, don’t worry too much about it. This sounds so fucking unoriginal, but we all make mistakes. We all have reasons for the way we are. If you recognize that, and are aware that you’re not perfect, as long as you don’t remain complacent, then you’re already doing it right.” 

Kenma agrees, and surprisingly also pipes in. “I’m not very good with people, or emotions myself. You and I are similar, I suppose. But I get the feeling that you’ll fit in with us just fine.” He offers a soft smile. 

“Aw, shit. I think my heart just exploded.” Kuroo bumps his arm against Kenma’s side. Kenma tries to look annoyed. They all know better. 

“Let’s take a photo!” Of course, Oikawa is the one that proposes the idea. 

“Ugh, how many pictures have you taken today, Tooru?” 

“Not enough!” He exclaims, then positions his arm in the air. “Are you guys ready? 1, 2, 3.,- smile!” The shutter goes off. “Another one!” After a couple of pictures, Oikawa finally puts his arm down.

“Kuroo-san, perhaps you’d like Oikawa-san to take pictures from your phone as well?” 

“What?” Kuroo says, pretending that he has no clue what Akaashi is referring to. But he narrows his eyes at him. Kenma is confused. 

“We look cute.” Oikawa says. They all crowd around Oikawa in an attempt to see the pictures. “Ugh, stop! I’ll just make a group chat or something and send it there.” 

“You know, even after hanging out with you a couple times, I haven’t managed to snag your number.” Bokuto says, looking down at Akaashi. 

“Oh, well- you can get it when Oikawa-san adds me in the group chat.” 

“I don’t have a contact photo for you!” Truthfully, he's sneaked enough pictures of Akaashi today, but another one won't hurt. 

“Then take one.” 

Bokuto hurriedly pulls out his phone, making sure to mute the shutter. He pulls open his camera app. “Ready?” 

Akaashi holds up a peace sign and smiles. Bokuto almost drops his phone. 

Akaashi gets a notification from his phone. **_Oikawa Tooru_ has added you to Gay™ **. 

“Seriously, Oikawa?” Iwaizumi complains. 

“Well, he’s not wrong.” Akaashi agrees. He feels Bokuto freeze beside him. 

“Are you saying, you’re gay?” 

“Bokuto-san. Are you saying, that you hadn’t _guessed?”_

“Dude, is your gaydar broken or something?” Kuroo exclaims, incredulously, which earns a slap on the shoulder. 

“No! Well- I don’t like making assumptions of other people. Next time, I’m taking you out on a proper date.” 

Akaashi goes quiet at that. A date. Perhaps even a first kiss. Things he had never even dreamed he would be able to experience in his short lifetime.  
He takes a look at his phone again. “Looks like I’ll actually be using my phone now.” 

“Hm?” 

“I don’t use my phone.” 

“What do you mean you don’t use your phone?” Oikawa sounds like he’s heard the most ridiculous thing, ever. 

“I… don’t use my phone? It’s not that deep.” Akaashi shrugs. Wow. 8 contacts. Truly, an achievement. 

“Make a snapchat!” 

“You broke your streak with me the other day! I fucking hate you.” Kuroo exclaims. 

“You insulted aliens! You don’t fuck with aliens, Kuroo!” Oikawa yells. 

“Jesus fucking Christ.” 

At this point, they had reached the front of the line. The attendee called for the next 2 customers.

“I think Aka-chan and Bokuto can go ahead?” 

“Are you guys sure?” 

“Yeah, the other two are coming soon anyway.” Iwaizumi insists. 

Akaashi thanks the four of them, Bokuto tugs him along to the carriage. They sit across from each other once inside. It’s silent. 

It truly does feel like a scene from the movies. The car continues to soar higher and Akaashi brings his leg up onto the bench for him to rest his head on. 

Bokuto is watching the view. Or should he say, Akaashi. The way the light reflects on the planes of his face, the way his eyes shift to take in every single little detail down below. He takes a moment to look outside as well. But as cheesy as it sounds, it’s nothing compared to what’s sitting across from him. 

As Bokuto looked away, Akaashi takes the chance to properly look at him. Bokuto was a view like no other. Really, everything about him was so unique and so different and, _wow._

Bokuto sneaks a glance and it surprised to see Akaashi staring. It’s usually the other way around. He fully turns so he can look at Akaashi. 

Oddly enough, looking at each other wasn’t _that_ unnerving. They both took the time to shamelessly observe the other. The whole thing was extremely calming. 

“I had fun today.” Akaashi says. 

“Today won’t be the last time you have fun! From now on you’ll probably going out with the five of us a lot more. I’ll be sure of it.” 

Akaashi blinks, the idea of hanging out with other people- _friends-,_ willingly and letting himself go on a regular basis, alien to him. But still, he says, _“I know.”_ and to himself, it sounds like the start of many more memories to come. 

He smiles.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> By the way, thank you to everyone who has been reading and keeping up with this story so far, comments will be appreciated. 
> 
> And for those who wished me good luck on my semi-finals last week! I love you guys,, I believe SeamoreRed, Keity, and Carrochan did??? If I'm not mistaken- do correct me if I'm wrong. 
> 
> -Basil


	4. pills

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, I know I said I would update last week and I lied! I'm finishing things up for my last semester and I have roughly about 2 weeks left of school- plus I had an event last weekend, so as you can see- I've been fairly busy. 
> 
> I hate making excuses and I'm apologizing, like I always do every time I update- and unfortunately I didn't get to make this chapter 10K words. :-(
> 
> Instead of every other week, I've decided to be more realistic and say that I update at least once or twice every month- I feel terrible that I can't manage a regular updating schedule, and I also think that this is a terrible update that needs a lot of editing, but nonetheless, I hope you guys enjoy this chapter, all I can say is- 
> 
> Oops. 
> 
> -Basil

Kenma wakes up to Akaashi’s alarm. 

Akaashi, is unsurprisingly- still asleep. Honestly. Kenma has no idea why he keeps setting alarms for himself when he never even wakes up when they ring.- Hell, he sleeps through them _all._ Kenma’s counted, and he had about 8 ringtones.- That being said, he’s also the one that turns them off. _Every. Single. One of them._ As terrifying as Akaashi is in the morning, it’s usually him that wakes him up and tells him to get ready.- A recent development over the course of the last week. Since the day at the amusement park, the two of them have been more comfortable around each other. The change is welcome.

Kenma stumbles out of bed, rubbing at his eyes sleepily. He walks over to the other side of the room where the raven is still sleeping, hidden under the mess of sheets. He nudges him with his knee. 

“Keiji. You need to get up. You’ll be late.” Kenma says in a low voice. 

Akaashi doesn’t stir. 

Kenma continues. “Come on, Akaashi.” He takes the top of the duvet and cautiously pulls it down.

Akaashi is lying flat on his stomach, with a pillow over his head. Kenma wonders if the warmth gets too much. 

_”Keiji,_ if you don’t get up right now I’m going to stop getting out of bed every morning just to wake you up.” That was a lie. It was near impossible to do that.  
Finally, Akaashi groans, green eyes blinking open, unfocused. He closes them again, a second later. “What time is it?” He croaks. 

“Seven. You have class in an hour.” 

“Ugh. I’m tired.” Akaashi’s voice trails off towards the end of his sentence.

“Come on.”

After a few minutes of Kenma’s insistent poking and prodding, Akaashi relents, getting up from the bed. “Did you call me by my first name, just now?” 

“Ah. Yeah. I’m sorry, does it make you uncomfortable? I can stop, if you want.” 

“Hm. It’s not unwelcome, I was just wondering why you don’t call Kuroo-san by his first name.” 

Kenma’s gaze flicks over to the corner. Mumbles. 

“I’m sorry? I didn’t quite catch that.” 

“I said, he gets all _weird_ about it.” 

Kenma feels Akaashi’s gaze on him linger. “I see.” He swears he hears Akaashi huff out a little laugh before disappearing into the bathroom. 

Shaking his head, Kenma crawls back into his bed. He opens up his phone, and scrolls through Instagram disinterestedly. Refreshing his feed, and the first thing  
he sees on his timeline is a picture of Akaashi, from non-other than Bokuto. 

In the photo, Akaashi has his hands in his pockets, the lower portion of his face hidden by his collar as his body is angled sideways,- wearing the same outfit from their day at the amusement park. Kenma thinks back to when he could have possibly taken this picture, then remembers, briefly, when Bokuto had asked Kuroo to take a picture with him. After the two parted, Kuroo had his signature shit-eating grin on his face. –But this one was… even more so than usual. Kenma had been talking to Oikawa at the time. He has to admit, it was pretty clever. 

The thing is, the picture didn’t have a caption. Bokuto always has captions for his photos. “Interesting.” He likes the photo.

A moment later, he gets a text. 

**from: kuro  
what are u doing awake your classes aren’t until the afternoon **

**to: kuro  
I should say the same to you.**

**from: kuro  
** fair enough.  
but why? 

**to: kuro  
Keiji. **

**from: kuro  
who is that **

**to: kuro  
I can’t tell if you’re being serious or not. **

**from: kuro  
Oh. OH. U mean akaashi **

**to: kuro  
Obviously. **

**from: kuro  
rude (ಥ﹏ಥ) what time did you sleep last night? **

 

**to: kuro  
ah. 2??? **

**from: kuro  
hey !!! that’s an improvement ! **

**to: kuro  
don’t get used to it. **

**from: kuro go back to sleep. I’ll swing by later.**

**to: kuro  
Okay. **

Kenma shuts his phone, and places it on his bed stand. He turns on his side to face the wall, curling into a ball. He closes his eyes, and falls asleep. 

 

Akaashi exits the bathroom a few minutes later, dressed in his usual attire, and hair still damp from the shower. He smiles a little upon seeing Kenma curled up into a little ball in the middle of his bed. He checks his bag to see if everything is inside, and quietly leaves the room. Bokuto sees him just at the same time he does. 

“Good morning.” Akaashi bows his head in Bokuto’s direction. 

That’s another thing. Akaashi actually says hello, now. 

“Hey, hey, hey! ‘Kaashi! How’d you sleep?” 

“Fine, I guess. And you?” 

“I’ve slept better. Wanna walk with me?” 

“Actually, I was going to grab breakfast first. Care for some cereal?” 

“Sure!” 

The two of them make their way to the kitchen. They’re greeted by the sight of a bleary-eyed Oikawa being scolded by Sugawara. Akaashi takes a look at the  
table and makes an educated guess. 

“How could you have fallen asleep in the _kitchen_ Tooru! Jesus, you’re going to give me a fucking a heart-attack! You-“ 

“Ah! Aka-chan, Bo-chan! Good morning!” Oikawa says, his eyes pleading. _Help me._

“I can’t seem to say the same to you, Oikawa-san. You look awful.” 

“I look like an average college student.” 

“Exactly. Awful. You usually don’t look like the average college student, Oikawa-san.” 

“Good morning, Suga!” Bokuto greets cheerily. 

“Morning, Bokuto, Akaashi-kun.” He smiles, but his demeanor changes once he turns to look at Oikawa, once more. _“Tooru,_ if you don’t get your ass into your bed into the next 60 seconds, I’m calling Iwaizumi.” 

Oikawa, unsurprisingly, goes rigid, and his eyes turn hard. “Tell Iwa-chan about this and I fucking _swear_ to god, Koushi, I’m not speaking to you. We both know I’m good at ignoring people. He has enough to worry about, much less _me._ Don’t you _dare_ add onto his stress.” 

“Fine. Be that way, but for fuck’s sake, Tooru. _Get. Some. Rest.”_

Oikawa frowns, pushes himself away from the table, and stomps out of the room. 

“Woah. What was that all about?” Bokuto says, and walks over to where the cereal boxes are. Akaashi gets the bowls and the spoons, and hands them over to Bokuto.

“Oikawa hasn’t been… taking care of himself, lately, as you could tell,” Suga pauses, gestures towards the table, and continues. “It’s nothing he hasn’t done before, but god damn it, I wish he would just _learn._ It’s always the same thing with him, and it never ends well.” 

“Oh. Yeah. I think there was a time that Oikawa fell asleep standing, and someone served a volleyball right at his head during practice. He had a minor concussion. Imagine all that _whining.”_

“He fell asleep _standing?_ Who does that?” 

“Tetsu does, too- occasionally. But not as often. Rarely, actually.” Bokuto says. 

“I hope _you_ don’t do that, Bokuto-san.” Bokuto whips around from where he’s preparing the cereal, eyes wide. 

“Bokuto doesn’t deal with stress like that. His body shuts down and he gets a really bad fever. Awful, really.”

“Noted.”

“Well, if it does happen again any time soon, you’ll be there to take care of him, yeah?” Sugawara nods, chewing on a granola bar. Akaashi sputters. He checks his watch. “Crap, I gotta go. Nice talking, Akaashi-kun. Bokuto.” He winks, grabs his bag, and disappears. 

“Here you go.” Bokuto hands him his cereal bowl, and settles into the stool next to him. 

“Thanks.” 

They eat, making small-talk along the way. Akaashi gets up to put the bowls in the sink. Once he gets there, his hand jerks, and the dishes land in the sink with  
a loud clang.

Akaashi’s eyes widen, and his hands come to hide behind his back immediately. 

“Are you okay, ‘Kaashi?” Bokuto is watching him carefully, his eyes focused. It made Akaashi shiver. 

“I’m fine. Shall we go?” 

“Whenever you’re ready.” Bokuto says.

Akaashi gets his bag from the stool, and walks ahead of Bokuto. He looks at his hand in front of him. His fingers are still twitching. He frowns. His hands always  
told him something. –Something was going to happen today. 

 

The two of them part once they reach the entrance of the building. 

“Fuck.” He curses, realizing that he had forgotten to take his medication for the day. There was a few more minutes left before class. He takes his pillbox, and  
makes his journey in search of a vending machine. He finds one, and stares at his shaking finger that hovers over the button.

“Woah dude, do you have a presentation today, or something?” 

Akaashi slams his finger on the vendor, and whips around to see someone standing around the same height as Bokuto. His hair is a light brown color, accompanied with an undercut. 

“Or something.” Akaashi bends down to retrieve his water bottle, and fails when he tries to open it. 

“Here, let me do it.” The guy- takes the bottle from Akaashi, and unscrews it- handing it back. 

“Thanks.” 

“Yeah! No problem…” 

“Akaashi.” 

“Ah. I’m Miya. Atsumu. I’m a freshman taking up architecture. You?” 

Akaashi glances up at him- Miya. Opens his pill box and pours them out on his hand. Throwing his head back, he chases the pills down with the water.  
“Freshman. Computer Sciences.. ” Akaashi watches him with careful eyes. The aura Miya is giving off is familiar… is it… Oikawa? 

“Ah, how come I don’t see you around very often?”

“I don’t really go out much. Now, if you’ll excuse me-“ Akaashi steps aside, ready to turn back to his classroom, when Miya grabs his wrist. 

Akaashi looks at him, then down at his wrist. Miya lets go, saying, “Sorry. But do you wanna meet up some time?” 

Akaashi stares. “If I find a reason for me to, then we’ll see.” He doesn’t give it much thought as he walks away and back into his classroom. To him, Miya is simply another person he met on a whim. 

Miya… on the other hand, isn’t quite on the same thought process.

Boy, was Akaashi’s life going to get a whole lot more interesting.

 

Shit. All that was running through Akaashi’s mind was _shit._ He’d been in class for an hour and his hands still wouldn’t stop shaking. He was beginning to get frustrated, since he had a blueprint to work on and if his hands could _stay still_ just for one fucking second- He feels his heart skip, and his hearing is fuzzy. 

_Not now. Not in the middle of class._ He walks up to his professor, excusing himself. 

He steps outside of the classroom, leaning against the door frame, willing his vision to clear. He feels across the wall- the clinic is… well, in his current state, too far. No one’s around. What the fuck. 

“Akaashi-kun?” Miya.

“Miya-san,” Akaashi swallows, tries to collect himself. “Perfect timing.” 

“Are you okay? You look like you’re about to pass out.”

“That’s…” _Why is there three of him,_ “Because, I probably am. Take me to the bathroom.” 

_“What?”_

_“The bathroom,_ Miya-san.” 

“What is this about? You’re scaring me.” 

“I really hate to spring this on you so suddenly but, I have epilepsy.” Miya kicks the door to the bathroom door open, and then removes himself from under  
Akaashi’s arm. 

“Five-“ Akaashi doesn’t get to continue, because his body falls forward, and Miya catches him, letting him down easy. Thankfully, they’re alone. 

_“What the fuck,”_ Miya doesn’t understand if this is something from one of the medical dramas he loves so much or a fucking scene from the Conjuring.  
What was it? Five what? Minutes? How long had it been?

Miya slaps his hands on both sides of his face. “Get yourself together.”He didn’t spend all of that time watching medical dramas when he could have been sleeping for nothing. It wasn’t like it was something serious, either. He tries to remember what the actors always did when the patient would be seizing. Akaashi’s clothes seemed loose enough, and he didn’t come into hard contact with the floor either, so that checks out two of the things- what was the other one? 

“Oh, shit-“ He turns Akaashi on his side, tearing his eyes away from him as he loses control over his own body. He stands with his hands on his hips, listening to the rustling on the floor, counting the seconds in his head.

Akaashi stops after two minutes. Miya bites his lip, worried that he may have done something wrong. 

Someone opens the door just now, “Akaashi-“ His eyes widen once he sees Akaashi in the state he’s in on the floor. He takes one glance at Miya, who’s frozen, before he sprints away. 

“Oh, you have _got_ to be kidding me.”

\---- 

“And you’re _sure_ nothing particularly inappropriate, happened?” The principal clarifies for the –enth time. His professor from his last subject standing nearby, eyeing Miya closely.

“Yes, Juro-sensei. Miya-san was just there to help, I assure you.” 

“Okay- now, if you’ll excuse me- I have other matters to tend to. Please be sure to take care of yourself better, Akaashi-kun. I’ll be seeing you around. Izanagi-sensei, I think it’s time we take our leave.” 

Akaashi stands to bow, but his knees almost buckle. Miya grips his arm to steady him. Akaashi bows his head apologetically at the principal, who nods in understanding. Then, Akaashi and Miya are alone in an awkward silence. 

They were in the clinic. After the student- Kyoutani- found them, he came back with the sensei in tow, who looked rather frazzled. Miya tells them that Akaashi needs medical attention. Now here they are.

After Akaashi sits back down on the bed, Miya leans in the dresser beside it. He smirks. “So,” 

Akaashi already _hates_ the tone in his voice. He inhales. “Thank you, Miya-san.” 

“For what?” 

“You know…” 

“I don’t, actually.” 

“I’m not going to say it.” 

“Say it.” 

“Suddenly, I’m mute.” 

_”Say it.”_ At this point, Miya has migrated from the dresser and is now sitting beside Akaashi on the bed. He bumps their shoulders. 

“Why are you so overbearing?” 

“I’m sorry, is that any way to treat anyone who practically _saved_ your life?” 

“You make it sound so audacious.” 

“Tell you what, how about you thank me some other way?” 

“I don’t entertain sexual favors. Sorry Miya-san.” Akaashi deadpans, and Miya actually laughs. 

“Hey, you said that we could meet up if you ever found a reason to, here it is! And as for that sexual favor- maybe we can grab some food first, hm?” Miya winks at the end of it. 

Akaashi gives him a blank stare. “Food. That’s all you’re getting. You can’t touch what you can’t afford.” 

“Indeed, you are priceless, Akaashi-kun! Can we add friendship alongside with that food?”

Akaashi rolls his eyes. “Do I have a choice?” 

Miya pretends to think about it, then shakes his head no. 

 

And that’s how the two of them end up sitting across from each other in the cafeteria. Akaashi pays for Miya’s food. Not that he wanted to, but Miya was unrelenting. He had never met someone so shameless. Akaashi takes a bite out of the carrot he was holding. 

“You went all the way to the cafeteria for a _carrot?_ ” 

“I can’t really eat much here, Miya-san. I have a diet to follow.” 

“Oh. That makes sense. So spill?” 

“My glass is empty.” He says, gesturing to the cup that he finished drinking from a few seconds prior. 

“Haha. You’re so funny.” Miya sneers, chewing at his food. 

“I just have one thing to ask of you- and that is to _not_ tell anyone.” 

“Why is it a secret? Wouldn’t it be easier to let everyone know so they don’t come unprepared like _I did?”_

Akaashi was beginning to see more and more why his mother was so afraid of him being alone so often. “Well, I’ll tell them… soon.”

“Who’s them?” 

“My…” Akaashi still finds it odd to call them his friends, yet it brings a small smile to his face. “Friends.” 

“Did you just… _smile?”_

“I’m not an android, Miya-san. 

“You almost had me fooled.” 

Akaashi throws the carrot stub at him, and reaches for another one. 

“Why talk to me so suddenly?” Akaashi asks, curious. 

“Well, I would have talked to you earlier, but you’re kind of closed-off.”

“How so?”

“Like I said earlier. I don’t see you around much. Which is kind of impossible considering we stay in the same building. –Actually, the same floor.”

“That doesn’t mean anything.”

“I see.” Miya reaches for his iced-tea. “Name at least 10 people from your class.” 

Akaashi opens and closes his mouth like some kind of fish. 

Miya peers at him from over the rim of his cup. “Mhm.” He sets the cup down. “Seriously? None. Like, at all. Jesus.” 

“Oh, shut up.” 

“I never see you talking to anyone. Maybe it’s the resting bitch face.” 

“I hope you choke, Miya-san.” 

“Kinky.” 

_Was I really that determined to avoid contact with anyone that I don’t even know the people from my own class?_ Akaashi shakes his head, incredulous towards his own self. 

“The similitude between that of you and Oikawa-san is striking.” 

“Please, you flatter me.” 

Akaashi rolls his eyes. 

 

Meanwhile, across the canteen is Kuroo. He pulls out his phone, opens his camera. 

**to: Nasty™  
** yo,,, who dis???  
*image attached* 

**from: Nasty™  
you seek the help of the mighty Oikawa Tooru? ☆*:.｡.o(≧▽≦)o.｡.:*☆**

**to: Nasty™  
just answer the question **

**from: Nasty™  
buy me milk bread. (°◡°♡)**

**to: Nasty™  
fine. I swear ur going to get diabetes. **

**From: Nasty™  
Aw, you care! ＼(＾▽＾)／**

**to: Nasty™  
** u haven’t answered d question  
answer it or no milk bread. 

**From: Nasty™  
** Mean!! ヾ(`ヘ´)ﾉﾞ  
But that’s Miya Atsumu. I met him at a party earlier this year. Sententious. 

**to: Nasty™  
** yike !  
he keeps laughin doe like I wonder what akaashi’s saying that’s so funny 

**from: Nasty™  
I don’t care, Christ. Get me my milk bread!!! I’ll be waiting＼(￣▽￣)／**

Kuroo shakes his head. Knowing Oikawa, he hasn’t even eaten a proper meal for the day. 

Brunch it is, then.  
He buys food for himself, Oikawa, and Kenma at one of the stalls. Nothing special- just some yakisoba. Afterwards, he passes by Akaashi’s table, who gives him a small wave. Kuroo’s eyes flick over to Miya, then he waggles his eyebrows. Akaashi gives him a blank stare. 

Miya turns his head just as Kuroo passes by, and his eyes widen. “That was Kuroo Tetsurou, just now, wasn’t it?” 

“I believe so.” 

“You’re friends with him?” 

Akaashi looks at him confusedly as he munches on another piece of carrot. “Yes? Is something the problem?” 

“Seriously?” 

“What?” 

“Him, Oikawa Tooru, and Bokuto Koutarou are on the national team!”

“I’m well aware, Miya-san. I don’t know what the big deal is.” 

“You’re friends with volleyball _legends!”_

“I didn’t take you to be the type to _fanboy,_ Miya-san.” 

“Shut up. How did you meet them, anyway?” 

“Our dorms are all on the same level. I’m roommates with Kenma-san.” 

“What the hell, bring me to your dorm, right now.” 

“No. I told you. Food. That’s it.” 

“Do it.” 

“Or what?” 

“The next time I see Kuroo-san, I’ll tell him.” 

Akaashi stills for a moment. “You’ll do _what?”_

Miya’s face is serious, before he smiles, “Of course not! I’m not that much of a prick.”

Akaashi has to remind himself that, sure. It’s alright for them to find out that he has epilepsy, and _maybe_ it would be better for his overall safety, but still. There was so much at stake. He _really_ wasn’t looking forward to telling them all about his deteriorating health. 

Akaashi finishes up the rest of his food, then stands up. 

“Hey, where are you off to so suddenly?” Miya says, placing all of his dishes onto the tray and scurries after him. 

“Away from you? I got you the food that I promised, didn’t I?” 

They reach the tray stand, Miya separates his dishes quickly. He grabs Akaashi’s wrist. “Hey. Do you really think I’m leaving you alone now that I know about  
your… condition? That would be shitty.” 

“So what, you’re going to babysit me?” 

“Well, someone has to, don’t they?” 

Akaashi’s eyebrows shoot up in surprise at the genuine concern lacing Miya’s voice. But he can’t ignore the whisper at the back of his mind that says, _‘This could be Bokuto. But you’re choosing not to tell him.’_

“Please don’t feel entitled to sticking around just because you found out about this… this whole thing.”

“What the hell? It’s messed up that something must have happened to make your mindset that way. I’m doing this because I want to.” 

Akaashi shifts on his feet awkwardly. “Um. Thank you… I guess.” 

“Sorry, did I make things awkward just now?” 

“Just a bit.” 

“Whoops! Sorry about that, but here, I’ll give you my number- so give me call if you ever need anything.” He turns Akaashi’s wrist upward, and pulls out a pen  
from his collar. He scribbles down the digits, and gently sets down Akaashi’s arm afterward. 

“Right, I really appreciate it, Miya-san. Thank you- but if you don’t mind- I have to do some work from class earlier, since… well I didn’t finish. Sensei said I needed to pass it to him before 6, tonight.” 

Miya knows that Akaashi’s just making an excuse to get away from him as of now, but he lets it be. “Okay. Well, I guess I’ll head this way.” Akaashi nods, and walks away, not sparing a second glance at Miya. 

Akaashi makes his way to the library, feeling unsettled. At least there- he’d feel more at ease in a more familiar environment, and he hadn’t talked to Akemi-san in a while. Akemi notices the young boy enter the library, and feels her face light up at Akaashi’s appearance. “Keiji-kun!” Her voice crackles, “I haven’t seen you in a couple days, why is that?” 

Akaashi smiles at the older lady. “Sorry, Akemi-san, I’ve been out with some people.”

She doesn’t bother to try and hide her surprise. “Oh, really? That’s certainly new. Care to tell?” 

Akaashi holds out her arm for him to grab as they walk towards the table he always sat in. 

“So...” He begins, and tells her all about his new friends.

 

Meanwhile, Miya finds himself a little preoccupied with his thoughts, intrigued by the aura that Akaashi has going for himself. He snickers, recalling the witty comebacks that seemingly had no end. 

He was definitely looking forward to his classes from now on. 

Kuroo arrives at the dorms, climbing up the stairs, arms full with food. He heads over to Oikawa’s room first. And is greeted with the ungodly sight of Oikawa Tooru. His hair is a mess and his glasses are crooked, his skin pale.

“Oikawa what the fuck? You look dreadful.” He walks toward the side of his bed. 

“Gee, thanks Kuroo.” He rolls his eyes. “Where’s my milk bread?” He reaches over for the plastic, and Kuroo instinctively raises his arm up. “No milk bread until you eat your yakisoba.” Kuroo pulls out the container, and holds it out for Oikawa, whom glares at him. “Eat your goddamn food Oikawa, I paid for this shit.” 

Kuroo sighs, and breaks apart a pair of chopsticks for the brunet to use. 

Oikawa pouts, but Kuroo isn’t having it. He drops the chopsticks in Oikawa’s lap, then begins to eat his noodles. 

He texts Kenma. 

**to: love of my life  
Hi. Oikawa’s room. **

A minute later, he hears the familiar sound of keys being pressed, and Kenma enters the room. He stares at Oikawa, blinks, then settles besides Kuroo on the floor. 

“Hey, what’s that supposed to mean?” Oikawa whines. 

“Nothing. I just looked at you.” 

“Yes but you gave me a look!” 

“I don’t need to tell you what you already know, Tooru.” 

“And what’s that?” 

“You need to rest.” 

“Which is you saying that I look terrible.” 

Kenma slurps his noodles loudly, which Kuroo smiles at. 

“Ew. Get out of my room if you’re going to get all cute with each other. You can miss me on that.” 

“Aw, Kenma, he misses Iwaizumi. How cute.” Oikawa throws a pillow at him, narrowly missing his head. “Watch the noodles!” 

“What’s he been up to, anyway?” Kenma says.

“He has this huge practical exam coming up, he needs all the time studying for it he can get. Me calling him and telling him how much I miss him isn’t going to help with that.” Oikawa chews angrily on his noodles. 

“You know he’d give anything just to talk to you, right?” 

“Of course I do! That’s not the issue.” 

“Isn’t it?” 

“I saw him last _week._ But before that we already weren’t talking as often. God, why am I such a little bitch?” 

“It’s normal for you to miss him, you guys have been together nearly all your life after all.” Kuroo points out. 

“Yes but it’s been a _year._ I should be getting used to it already! Plus Iwa-chan’s been doing just fine. I feel so _clingy.”_

“Well, you know what they say, absence makes the heart grow fonder.” 

“Maybe a little bit _too_ fond.” Oikawa pouts, setting down his finished cup of Yakisoba on his bedside. 

Kuroo hates to admit it, but he actually feels bad for Oikawa. He hands the milk bread over to Oikawa, who takes a bite out of it. He’s alarmed when he sees Oikawa’s brown eyes start to water, and his nostrils flare. 

_”Iwa-chan always knew what kind of milk bread to get me!”_ He cries. 

“Tooru-“ Kenma calls, calmly, and Oikawa _sobs._

Kuroo has the nerve to _laugh._ Oikawa was always such an ugly crier. 

“Don’t laugh at me, you dick!” Oikawa says, hiccupping, biting the bread once more.

Despite him laughing, Kuroo is still the one that ends up giving Oikawa the tissue. 

Kuroo nudges Kenma, whispering, “Go give him a hug.” 

“Why me?” 

“Your hugs make anyone feel better. Trust me, I would know.” 

“I’m _dating_ you, of course you’d say that.” 

“Oh, no. Trust me. Bokuto would agree with me on this one.” 

“Bokuto agrees with you on anything.” 

“That’s true. But just do it, I swear.” 

Kenma finishes chewing, and swallows his food. He goes over to Tooru, taking the half-eaten bread and setting it down on the bedside, and wraps his arms  
around Oikawa’s shoulders. 

Oikawa automatically nestles his head in the crook of Kenma’s shoulder, crying even harder- which makes Kenma whip his head around to look at Kuroo in a  
mild panic. 

Kuroo waves him off, mouthing, “Let him,” and Kenma relaxes, running his fingers through Tooru’s curls. He receives a text from Bokuto. 

**from: brokuto  
yo dude, where u @ **

**to: brokuto  
Oikawa’s. **

He starts typing up another text to tell him to be careful when entering, but less than a minute later, Bokuto opens the door, greeting with a loud, “Hey, hey,- oh no. What’s wrong?” 

Kuroo always finds that it’s cute how soft and gentle Bokuto’s voice turns when he comforts someone. It’s such a sharp contrast to the roughness of his usual tone.

Bokuto sets his bag down on the floor, sitting beside Oikawa on the bed.

Oikawa lifts his head from Kenma’s shoulder, where a small patch has formed from where his tears have been absorbed. Kenma crawls off of Oikawa’s lap, and Oikawa moves to rest his head on Bokuto’s shoulder. “I miss Hajime.” 

“Why don’t you call him?” 

“I can’t!" 

“What do you mean you can’t?” 

Oikawa explains the situation and Bokuto says his thoughts. “Well, personally- if I was Iwaizumi I would want nothing more but to hear your voice. You should  
really call him, y’know? Give him some words of encouragement. Plus, he’ll notice something’s up if you aren’t calling him regularly like you usually do. That’ll worry him.” 

Oikawa sniffles. “I guess that’s true.” 

“I bet you he’ll pick up in a heartbeat.” Kuroo says. 

Oikawa nods, then pats around his bed for his phone. Once he finds it, Bokuto snatches it from him, not doubting for one second that Oikawa was probably going to have second-thoughts.

“Hey! What are you-?” 

Bokuto presses Iwaizumi’s contact, and within the first five rings, he’s picked up. He presses it against Oikawa’s ear, whom answers it with a shaky, “H-hello?”

Knowing that he doesn’t sound like his usual self, he clears his throat. He listens for a moment before smiling. 

“You answered so fast, Iwa-chan. Miss me already?” You couldn’t miss the warmth in Oikawa’s voice as he said so.

Kuroo whispers, _“Softie.”_ which earns him a pillow to the face. 

Bokuto smiles encouragingly at Oikawa, before pointing his thumb in the direction of the door. Oikawa smiles, mouthing a thank you. He picks up his bag, tilting his head towards the door. Kuroo and Kenma follow. 

“D’you think Akaashi’s back in your dorm, Kenma?” Bokuto’s voice is back to normal now. 

“I don’t know.” 

“He probably isn’t, I saw him with some guy earlier. Oikawa said his name was Miya Atsumu.” 

And, true to what Kuroo said, Kenma opens the door to their room, only to find it empty. 

“Oh.”

“Yep.” Kuroo pops the ‘p.’ “Also, speaking of Akaashi, you were totally conspicuous when you posted earlier dude.” 

“You think so?” 

“You didn’t put a caption on it.” Kenma states. 

“Well, what was I supposed to put? Wow, the view is stunning tonight?”

“True.” Kuroo nods.

“I’m still planning to ask him, but do you guys wanna join later? We might watch a movie.” Kenma informs. 

“By that you mean creepy shit, right? I don’t play with demons.” Kuroo says.

“Please, horror movies are the only movies with any real substance lately.” 

“I’m sorry, I just don’t happen to like watching people have their bodies levitate into the air and proceed to contort unusually. Yeah, there’s nothing unsettling  
about that!” Kuroo retorts. 

“I thought that you thought that horror movies were boring.” Bokuto says.

“Right, that’s not why I binge watch them till morning.” Kenma deadpans. 

“Well, they kind of are? Stupid white people always do the same thing and go where they _aren’t_ supposed to go.” Kuroo says. 

“I just don’t get how you don’t flinch, or scream.” Bokuto shakes his head. 

“I don’t get how you go to _sleep.”_ Kuroo says. 

“You can usually tell when there’s going to be a jumpscare.” 

“That doesn’t make them any less _terrifying.”_ Bokuto cries. 

Kenma shrugs. “It isn’t real. That’s it. That’s why I can go to sleep. Because _I know_ that. Akaashi doesn’t flinch or scream either.” 

“How do you know this?” 

“One night he arrived and I was sitting upside down on the bed. Told him I was bored. He asked if I wanted to watch with him. I said yes. End of story.” 

“Was this recently?” 

“Nope, classes had just begun then.” 

“Akaashi… doesn’t flinch?” Kuroo sounds apprehensive. “I’d like to see that.”

“And what, embarrass yourself?” Bokuto taunts.

“It’s perfectly normal to get scared, it’s a fucking horror movie.”

Kenma shakes his head, opening a new message.

 

**to: Keiji  
hi, movie later? **

**from: Keiji  
Sure. By movie, I assume you meant horror? **

**to: Keiji  
you got it. **

Akaashi tucks his phone away and into his pocket. “If you’ll excuse me, Akemi-san. I have to get my work done.” 

“Don’t stay late like you did before, okay?” 

“Don’t worry about it, I’ll be out of your hair by 5.” 

Akemi reaches over to run a wrinkly hand over the side of Akaashi’s face. She pats his head once, before waddling back to the counter. Once he’s made sure that she won’t be falling over, he pulls out his laptop, along with his mouse. He cracks his knuckles once, and gets to work. 

He’s finishing up the last bits of his measurements and computations for his blueprint, before his phone dings with a notification.

**from: Kenma-san  
** Where are you?  
We’re thinking of getting some food before we watch. 

**to: Kenma-san  
I’m almost done. **

He hesitates sending his next text, unconfident, but manages to coax himself into doing so.

**to: Kenma-san  
I can cook dinner. And by we, do you mean Kuroo-san, Bokuto-san, and Oikawa-san?**

**from: Kenma-san  
** Are you sure?  
I haven’t asked Tooru yet, he needs to rest. 

**to: Kenma-san  
He also looks like he needs to eat.**

**from: Kenma-san  
Alright. I’ll text him. **

**to: Kenma-san  
Great. Any requests?**

**from: Kenma-san  
Ramen. **

He winces, knowing that noodles are a restriction on his diet. Well. It’s not like he ate like that every day, right? Plus he ate the burger almost a week ago, what could possible go wrong?

He works a bit faster, and once he’s done, he emails the file to his professor, and shuts down his laptop. He pushes it closed, and places it in his bag. His hands are still trembling slightly, but it’s an improvement from earlier. 

“See you tomorrow, Akemi-san.” He bows his head in her direction, sparing her a small smile as she waves goodbye. 

He decides to head back to the dorm first to leave some of his stuff behind, as well as to bring more money. 

He jogs through the campus, and takes the stairs two steps at a time. He gets to his door, and opens it to see Kenma, whom just recently arrived from his afternoon classes, laying in between Kuroo’s legs and Bokuto upside-down on his bed. 

“Akaashi!” Bokuto tries to sit up a little too fast, and ends up in a heap on the floor. 

Akaashi sets down his bag in his desk chair before extending a hand over to Bokuto in order to help him up. 

“Are you okay, Bokuto-san?” Akaashi asks, concerned.

“Yeah! S’all good.” 

“I still have to make a trip to the grocery. Are you guys coming?”

Kuroo and Kenma share a knowing look. The former speaks first. “Nah. It’s fine, you guys can go ahead- we’ll wait here.” 

“Are you sure?” 

“Yup! Now get going, I’m hungry.” 

“Then we’ll go extra slow, Kuroo-san.” 

“Get out.” 

“It’s not your dorm.” 

“I’m Kenma’s boyfriend. Technically it is!” 

“Dude, you’re so annoying.” Bokuto says.

“It’s my specialty. Tell me something I don’t know.” 

Akaashi walks over to his night stand and pulls open one of the drawers, reaching for his allowance. 

Kuroo doesn’t miss the rattling of the bottles inside. “Yo, what do you have in there?” 

Akaashi’s heart nearly stops. “Nothing of importance.” This time, when he shuts the drawer, he’s careful not to shake the dresser. “If you’ll excuse us, we’ll be going now. Bye, Kenma-san.” 

“Rude.” Kuroo remarks, which Akaashi disregards. He tries to ignore the funny feeling in his chest at the thought of being alone with Bokuto, given that it was something that he had done before.

“Let’s go, Bokuto-san.” 

“Okay!” Bokuto says with much enthusiasm (Akaashi hates the little voice at the back of his mind that goes, _cute_ )

Once outside, Bokuto wastes no time. “How was your day?” 

_I collapsed,_ “Fine, I suppose. And you?” 

“Except for the part with Oikawa, I would say it was pretty good!” 

“Did something happen with Oikawa-san?” 

“His day didn’t come off to a particularly good start is all.”

“That’s too bad. Hopefully some ramen will cheer him up.” 

“He’s probably going to stay up late all night again. The semester’s barely even started and he’s already working himself to the bone!”

“He’ll be fine as long as we look after him.” 

They chat idly on the way to the store. 

They arrive. “Random question, but if you could go anywhere, where would you go?” Bokuto takes one of the baskets. 

Akaashi doesn’t need much time to think. “Europe. France, in particular.” He walks towards the vegetable isle. 

“Why’s that?”

“I’ve always liked French movies. It’d be great if I could see where it all comes to life.” _Too bad I won’t be able to._

“French movies?” 

Akaashi makes a sound of acknowledgement, placing the vegetables in the basket before moving towards the spices. 

“I’ve never seen one before. Maybe you can show me one some time.” Bokuto says, fiddling with the sleeves of his shirt. 

Akaashi glances at him, and finds it odd to see him so timid. “Sure.” He can’t help but smile upon seeing Bokuto’s face light up. He grabs a few more things, and they move towards the counter. This time, Akaashi makes sure that he’s prepared with his money. Before Bokuto can do anything, Akaashi slides his bills over to the attendee. 

“Damn it!” Bokuto pouts.

“Bokuto-san, you can’t pay for all of my purchases every time we go out together.” 

“I sure can!” 

“No, you can’t.” 

“Why not?” 

“I forbid it.” 

“That’s no fun!” 

If there was one thing Akaashi hated, it was when people spent money on him. He especially dislikes it when people give him gifts. He just hated the feeling of not being able to repay you. Surprises always made him feel bad, because he thinks like this: why should you waste your money on something so trivial and inconsequential as him? It’s like, what’s the point of giving him a gift when he probably won’t be able to use it anyway, since… _you know._ -But it was weird, because Akaashi loved giving people gifts.- At least, back when he still had people to give gifts to.  
He sees Bokuto pouting from his peripheral, but doesn’t point it out as he picks up the grocery bag- which Bokuto takes from him immediately. “If you didn’t let me pay then at least let me carry it.” 

They both awkwardly stare at one another before the person after them clears their throat impatiently, which makes Akaashi promptly turn around and exit the store. 

Honestly, he hated how unlike himself he was around Bokuto. He hated that he had to feel even more out of control with his own body. Take now for example, his face was probably turning pink, and there was nothing he could do about it except turn around and walk away.  
He was coming in contact with a bunch of emotions that he hadn’t felt or dealt with in a long while, and it was overwhelming, because he didn’t know how to cope with it. 

On the outside, he may seem calm and composed, but every time he hung out with other people, his mind was like a mine-field. It was just him constantly trying to decide on whether or not he’s doing the right thing. It was tiring, being so hyperaware. –It was so unfamiliar to him, having to be so critical of his actions. But he has no one else to blame for his disquietude, a result from when he began distancing himself. Having little to none of social-interaction over the past few years has left him stiff.

Although, Akaashi supposes it was rather amusing to be around other people, and he couldn’t deny the genuine elation he gets whenever his phone dings and he sees that for once, his messages aren’t only from his family. 

Speaking of family, Akaashi feels his phone vibrate in his pocket. “Who is it?” Bokuto asks. He sees Yoichi’s contact photo and immediately answers it. “My brother.” He answers. Yoichi appears on the screen a few seconds later.

“Hey, Yoi-chan.” 

“Onii! You haven’t called in a while.” 

“I’ve been busy. I like your glasses by the way,” He says, referring to the blue frames adorning his brother’s face. 

“Thank you! Where are you, right now?” 

“I’m walking back to campus. I bought some things to cook for dinner.” 

“By yourself-?!” 

“I’m with someone.” Akaashi tilts the screen towards Bokuto’s curious expression. “Say hi, Bokuto-san.” 

“Hey! Akaashi’s mentioned you. It’s nice to meet you.” 

“Bokuto? As in Bokuto Koutarou? –Likewise! You posted a very nice picture of my brother earlier today, but I have to ask, when did you take it?” 

Akaashi looks at Bokuto. “You _what?_ When were you planning to tell me, Bokuto-san?” 

“That’s what you get for not having any social media!”

“When did you take it?” 

“Last week, when we were at the amusement park!”

“How?” 

“I asked Kuroo to pretend me and him were taking a selfie. You didn’t think much of it.”

Akaashi clicks his tongue against the roof of his mouth. “How ingenious.” 

“Kuroo Tetsurou? Onii, are you friends with the entire _national team?”_ Yoichi says.

“Yes, Kuroo Tetsurou. I’m friends with Oikawa-san as well.” 

“I’m so jealous!” 

“Enough about that, how’s mom?” 

“Good! Concerned that her favorite son hasn’t been messaging as much, but otherwise… actually she’s been rather curious about what you’ve been doing that  
you don’t have the time to talk to her-“

“Yoichi, I told you to put your clothes in the laundry-! Is that Keiji?” 

“Here we go.” Yoichi mutters, the phone snatched from his hands. 

“Hey, mom.” 

“Keiji, dear! How have you been?” He hears Yoichi in the background. “He has _friends!”_

“Really? That’s wonderful!” Keiji winces at the over-excited tone in his mother’s voice. 

“Hi, Akaashi-san!” 

“Oh, would you look at that! Who’s this?” 

“Bokuto Koutarou, Akaashi-san. It’s nice to meet you.”

“Have you been taking care of my boy?” 

“Mom, please stop.” 

“I’d like to think so!” Bokuto speaks over Keiji. 

“That’s wonderful! And what are you two up to?” 

“I’m cooking dinner. We just bought some things, mom.” Keiji replies.

“Really, what are you having?” 

“Ramen! I’m hyped to taste your son’s ramen, Akaashi-san! You’ve taught him well!” 

“Ramen? Keiji, you aren’t-“ 

“Mom.” Keiji cuts his mother off, and shakes his head every-so-slightly. His mom frowns, but gives a nod of understanding. “Anyway, how’s dad?” 

“The same. Always at the hospital, you know.” 

“Ah.” 

“I’ll make sure you talk to him one of these days.” 

“Don’t worry about it, mom. But anyway, we’re almost at the dorm now, I’m watching a movie with a few other people.” 

“Oh! Well alright, call me again tomorrow, okay?” 

“Of course. Love you.” 

“I love you too, Keiji! Have fun!” 

Keiji smiles, and ends the call, just as the reach the steps to the building. 

“Your mom seems nice.” 

“She is.” 

“She seems a bit more… lively?” 

“She is. -my dad usually took care of me when I was younger- and my mom would be the one who was rarely ever home, which is why I’m nothing like my  
brother or my mom. But these days, it’s my dad that works a lot and my mom always at home.”  
Akaashi doesn’t tell Bokuto that after his father found out that he had been sick, his father seemed more distant. Akaashi could understand. It was the same thing with his friends- the distance just made everything easier, he was alike with his father in that sense. Whenever his mother had tried to bring it up, they would fight- or he would avoid the topic altogether.

“Ah.” Bokuto doesn’t point out that Akaashi just willingly told him something about himself. _Baby steps._

They make their way to the kitchen, where Oikawa is brewing himself a cup of coffee. 

“If you stay up tonight, Sugawara’s going to _end_ you.” Is the first thing that Bokuto says upon seeing him. 

“It’s one cup, Bokuto! Hey, Aka-chan! Where did the two of you come from?” 

“The grocery! Akaashi’s cooking.” 

“You did the groceries together, and Akaashi’s cooking. Why does this sound vividly familiar?” 

“You weren’t creeping, this time around.” Akaashi notices that the aura around Oikawa from this morning has changed to something a bit more… well, like  
Oikawa. 

“I told you! I just happened to pass by, that time!” 

“Right. Well I’m cooking ramen for dinner, feel free to join, Oikawa-san.” 

“Gods, I can’t remember the last time I’ve had home-cooked ramen.”

“Hopefully you’d find mine up to your liking.” 

“I’m excited! Do you mind me just sitting here and talking or do you need any help?” 

Bokuto vigorously shakes his head no. “Hell no. Do _not_ let Oikawa touch anything. He can’t cook for shit.”

“Hey!”

“You wouldn’t be able to tell ripe from rotten!” 

“You never know, maybe Oikawa-san is more of a baker.” Akaashi says, taking the ingredients out from the bags and setting them down on the counter.

“Why say so?” 

“Hm… well you have a sweet-tooth, as far as I can tell- and you give off the, ‘nothing should go wrong,’ type of vibe- which is exactly what baking is about-  
careful, and precise.” 

“Huh… maybe I’ll try it some time.” 

“I’ll do it with you, if you want- just in case something goes wrong.” 

“That’d be great!” 

“Please don’t burn down the floor.” Bokuto says, pulling out a pot as well as some other utensils from the cabinets.

“Oh, shut up, Bo-chan.” 

“Let’s get started.” Akaashi says, pushing up the sleeves of his shirt and moving over to the sink to wash his hands.

“Okay, what do you want me to do?” 

“Wash the vegetables.” 

Bokuto nods, and Akaashi gets started on the noodles. 

It takes about an hour to prepare the whole thing, though it only felt like a few minutes to the three of them. Oikawa and Bokuto spoke the most, Akaashi  
speaking only when asked. 

Oikawa goes away for a moment to call Kuroo and Kenma, Bokuto and Akaashi left to set the table. 

The three of them come back, and of course, Kuroo makes a comment. “Oh my, you’re setting the table? How long have you two been together?” He smirks, and  
Akaashi glares at him. At once, he takes note of his disheveled appearance, more so than normal- looks over at Kenma, and looks at his neck. 

Bingo.

He keeps his face neutral. “That’s a rather interesting bruise you have there, Kenma-san. I wonder what kind of beast would do such a thing.” He hears him  
stumble on his way to his seat, looking at Akaashi with wide eyes. 

“Kuro, I told you not to do it somewhere obvious.” The blond frowns in disdain.

“You weren’t complaining-“ 

“Okay, ew. Stop.” Bokuto exclaims, waving a hand out in front of his, a disgusted look on his face. 

“Can we eat? I’m hungry.” Oikawa complains, and everyone sits in their own respective chairs. 

They eat, and they eat, until there’s nothing left in the pot, and together they all clean up. 

“Are you guys still up for that movie?” 

“What movie?” Oikawa asks. 

“I told Kenma-san to invite you earlier, but I guess he was a little… busy. That being said, we’re watching a horror movie… or two.

“Sure, I guess? I have nothing better to do?”

“But you hate horror movies.” Kenma states, and Akaashi backtracks. “Oh, well if that’s the case- then,”

“No! It’s fine, I need a break anyway, what’s better than shitting myself scared?”

\---- 

They all settle themselves in Bokuto and Kuroo’s room, since they were the only ones with a proper TV. (curtesy of his parents, a parting gift)

Kenma makes Bokuto and Kuroo sit together figuring that the both of them will be extremely violent, and not to mention- _loud_ during the jump scares. Kenma wasn’t in the mood to deal with that. So, he sits next to Akaashi, and makes Oikawa rest his head on his lap.

“What are we watching?” 

“Don’t Breathe.” Akaashi and Kenma reply at the same time.

Akaashi thinks that the movie has a fairly interesting plot, and the jump scares are well placed. Kuroo, however- seems to think otherwise. 

“I fucking told you! Stupid white people going to places where they shouldn’t be! Oh look! A seemingly abandoned house with rumored gold in it! Fucking  
fantastic!” 

“Kuro, if you don’t calm down someone will reprimand us and whoever is on duty is going to come over and scold you.” Kenma drones. Which of course, the two  
men ignore. 

“Oh my god, Tetsu, hold me!” Bokuto wails, wrapping his arms around Kuroo’s shoulders. 

“Fucking _don’t breathe!_ Oh my god! He’s going to find- WHAT IN THE LIVING FUCK-?!” 

“STOP!” Bokuto yells. 

Akaashi ends up watching them instead of the movie. Quality comedy. –Oikawa blatantly laughs at the two of them. 

Akaashi zones out a bit, and a random idea pops into his head. He looks over at Kenma. “Kenma-san, have you ever braided your hair before?” 

The hand in Oikawa’s hair stops, and when Akaashi looks down, the brunet has fallen asleep. He looks back up. 

“No.” Kenma pauses to let Bokuto scream before continuing. “Never really thought about it. I’m surprised Tooru hasn’t either.” 

“Would you perhaps, consider?” 

Kenma’s eyes widen a fraction before they return to their normal size. He merely moves so that his back is facing Akaashi, careful not to jostle Oikawa’s head in his lap. 

Kuroo and Bokuto are both far too absorbed in the movie, which is funny because they were the ones so adamant on not watching in the first place. Yet here were the both of them, screaming at the TV passionately and undoubtedly disturbing everyone on the floor. 

Akaashi’s hands are nimble yet gentle as he runs them through the blonde strands, surprised to find that Kenma actually leans into the touch. 

“Why do you know how to braid hair?” 

“My mom.” He explains. “For some reason she made me learn how to braid hair. I guess it’s rather odd, many moms don’t ask their children to braid their hair,  
but it was our way of bonding, I guess. She would sit there, and ask me questions, and I would stand there and answer.” He smiles at the memory, which felt like an eternity ago. 

Although his mother wasn’t home often, she put a lot of effort in for her family. I guess you could say that Akaashi’s family was somewhat out-of-the-norm, with his dad tending to the affairs at home, and his mother working. 

Kenma hums.

Akaashi decides on a waterfall braid, so he sets to work, taking the pieces of hair and overlapping them with one another, careful not to make it too tight. When  
Akaashi takes the front pieces of Kenma’s hair, the latter finds it fascinating, how much he could see- since his hair was in his face nearly all the time.  
Kenma finds it unusual that he said yes, considering that he hates having his hair tied, because his field of vision was too wide and it unnerved him when people stared at his face. –It was like his cloak. But he finds he’s comfortable enough at the moment. 

Akaashi finishes, twisting his body to see if it looks alright in the front, and decides that he’s satisfied with his work. “All done.” It was difficult not to stare, since he never really had a proper look at Kenma’s face, but he looks sort of like a pixie… almost. There was a pointiness to his ears, and his eyes were almost too big for his face, but it suited him, somehow. 

Kenma takes his phone and opens up his camera to see what he looks like, and is pleasantly surprised. He doubts he’ll be wearing his hair like this very often,  
though. “Thank you.”

“You should take a picture.” Akaashi suggests, but Kenma doesn’t find the idea very comforting, opting for snapchat instead. He sets the timer to 2 seconds and takes a quick photo. He films a video, only his eyes and up visible, tilting the camera over to Akaashi whom gives a small wave. 

He shows Bokuto and Kuroo trembling in the corner, then turns it back to himself, shaking his head. 

“How long has it been?” 

“I think the movie’s almost done.” 

True enough, the credits started rolling not too soon after, Kuroo and Bokuto letting out a simultaneous sigh of relief. 

“I feel more awake than ever. Am I going to go to sleep tonight? Probably not.” Kuroo nods to himself, looking over at Kenma and doing a double-take when he  
sees that his hair is braided. “Holy shit.” 

“What?” Bokuto jolts, looking over as well. “Holy shit, indeed! Aw, Kenma- you look adorable!” 

“I think I have a boner.” Kuroo mutters. Kenma hears, but pretends not to notice and continues to scroll through his phone. He didn’t think braiding his hair  
would be such a big deal. 

“How?” 

“Akaashi.” 

“When?” 

“You both were too absorbed in to movie to notice.”

“Kenma, will you-?” 

“No, Kuro.” 

“What? But I didn’t even say anything!” 

“You were going to ask me if I could wear my hair like this every day. Judging by your… reaction, it’ll attract too much attention.” 

“I’m your boyfriend, of course I’ll overreact!” 

“Don’t ask me, ask Keiji.” 

Kuroo looks at Akaashi pleadingly, whom shrugs. “I’ll braid Kenma-san’s hair whenever he asks me to.” 

“It’s only 9!” Bokuto exclaims, and that’s when Akaashi realizes that he forgot to take his medication for the night. He shuts his eyes in irritation, moving to get  
up. 

“Where are you going?” Bokuto asks. 

“I just need to do something, I’ll be right back.” And with that, he exits the room. 

 

“Don’t you find it odd how Akaashi never specifies what he’s doing?” Kuroo asks.

“Hm, I don’t really notice.” Bokuto replies. 

“Of course you don’t, you’re oblivious when it comes to that kind of thing.” 

“I think you’re over-thinking it.” Kenma provides, which Kuroo doesn’t say anything to.

“Mind your own business, Kuroo. It’s gotten you in trouble before. Aka-chan will tell us whatever he needs to tell us in his own time. He’s still not used to this.”  
Oikawa stirs, from his sleep, blinking sleepily. Having an idea as to what Akaashi might have needed to do. 

“I thought you were asleep!” The dark-haired man exclaims. 

“You honestly think I was getting a proper sleep with all the goddamn shrieking and jumping you guys were doing? I felt my brain shake.” 

“Oh, boo-hoo, if you wanted sleep so badly you should have gone to your room.” 

10 minutes pass and Akaashi still had yet to return.

Kenma taps Oikawa’s head, and the brunet simply lifts it while continuing his banter with Kuroo. He pads over to his own dorm, only to find Akaashi knocked out on the bed, his face smushed against the pillow. 

No, Akaashi didn’t have a seizure whilst by himself in the ten minutes that he was gone. He simply fell asleep, his fatigue taking its toll on his body. Kenma doesn’t seem to notice the pill-bottles that Akaashi accidentally leaves on the nightstand, instead pulling the covers up around Akaashi’s shoulders, and adjusting his head slightly to make it more comfortable. 

He heads back to the bedroom, and watches Oikawa’s eyes widen (with worry? About what, Kenma isn’t sure), at Akaashi’s absence, and Kenma simply states that the raven fell asleep. Oikawa relaxes. 

Kenma makes his way over to Kuroo’s bed, where he tucks himself under the covers and feels his eyes start to close. He falls asleep not too soon after.  
Bokuto, Kuroo, and Oikawa talk until it’s nearly midnight, and Oikawa takes his leave, opting for his own bed. 

Kuroo slides into the space besides his boyfriend, whom automatically moves closer at the newfound body heat. 

Bokuto lays on his back, happy that he once more got to spend more time with Akaashi, and satisfied at the progress he’s made with him. There’s still the lingering feeling of being watched from the movie, and so he decides to take out his earphones and listen to some music to help him go to bed. 

He smiles, recalling the playlist that Akaashi shared with him the other day, clicking on it- and finally allows himself to rest, lasting thoughts of the younger boy still alive in his mind.

\---- 

Kuroo finds himself awakened by his own allergies. His nose is unbearably itchy, and he pinches it to prevent himself from sneezing and potentially waking up Kenma.

Carefully, he detangles himself from the smaller man, and gets up. He checks their medicine cabinet for some antihistamine, and groans when he finds none. He  
curses under his breath, knowing that he’d have to go to Kenma’s room to go and find some.

One thing him and Kenma have in common is that they both get really bad allergies. 

He sneezes loudly, feeling his eyes water, and figures that it’s far too annoying to bypass.

He slides on his slippers, dragging his feet across the short distance, and it takes him a few tries to punch in the code to the door correctly, still half-asleep. He makes his way into the room, and when he doesn’t find the pills in the medicine cabinet, he walks over to Kenma’s nightstand, whispering a quiet, ‘thank god,’ when he sees what he’s looking for. 

When Kuroo stands back up, he stubs his toe into the wood, making him stagger and bump into Akaashi’s nightstand earning a very loud, “Motherfucker!”, as well causing some things to fall over.

Including his pills.

He grimaces, bending down to pick up what had fallen. He blinks in an attempt to clear up his vision, reading the labels, his eyebrows creasing when he sees them. 

“Carbemazepine, Briviact, Zarontin, -what the hell.” There was also a bottle of painkillers. 

Akaashi blinks his eyes open blearily at the loud sound, eyes widening when he sees Kuroo, and the bottles in his hands. He pushes himself up off of the bed,  
and moves to stand. 

“Woah, slow down there, Akaashi. Take a seat. _What is this?”_

“Just some supplements, Kuroo-san, please give them back.” He grabs them from Kuroo’s hands, opens his drawer and just drops them in. He realizes that it probably wasn’t the best idea, considering the drawer just had more of his medication inside. 

Kuroo briefly wonders why Akaashi would even consider lying. Then, he remembers. “I haven’t told you what I’m studying to be, have I?” 

Akaashi doesn’t answer, he only stands up, avoiding Kuroo’s gaze. 

“I’m majoring in _Bio-chemistry_ , Akaashi. It's because I’m planning on becoming a pharmacist, or something along those lines. –And I know for a fact that those pills aren’t just supplements.”

Akaashi still doesn’t look at him.

“So.” Kuroo pauses, shifting from one foot to another. “Would you care to explain?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kindly point out any errors/mistakes you find as well, thank you! 
> 
> My next update is going to take longer than usual, finals are coming up and I have shit-ton of last minute presentations and requirements to accomplish. That's all I'd like to say, I'm sure you all understand. 
> 
> Q: Do any of you like to draw? If so, I'd love to see some of your work! Or if you feel like dropping by and asking a question. Come and say hi!  
> tumblr:etherealakaashi  
> twitter:archchangyeol
> 
> -Basil


	5. revelation

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> YIKE! I got a little bit carried away and wrote more than I expected. 12,661 words, to be exact. So. Have fun.
> 
> -Basil

Akaashi told himself that he didn’t hate Kuroo Tetsurou. He had no reason to, in the first place. Him being hostile had just been an instinct. 

In that moment, however, he wished for nothing more but for him to disappear. He wasn’t equipped to deal with the situation, not to mention, Akaashi was absolute shit at confrontation. 

So of course his body decides to turn on him in the form of a panic attack. He feels his chest tighten and the tears brim his eyes. Honestly, this whole situation could go fuck itself.

“Akaashi?” Kuroo calls, but his voice is beginning to get muffled. He answers him with ragged breaths. 

“Woah, okay, slow down there bud. Are you having a panic attack?” Kuroo asks, moving forward and crouching in front of him.

Akaashi nods frantically, and places a hand upon his chest. 

Kuroo, in this situation, manages to remain calm, having experienced a fair share of his own, and has even helped Kenma through a few of his. 

But Akaashi wasn’t Kenma or Kuroo, so in this case- he was going in blind. 

“Okay, you’re okay.” Kuroo says firmly, placing his hands on Akaashi’s knees. “Listen to my voice, okay? Just, slow breaths. Easy.” Akaashi glances at him, and Kuroo sets an example. “Breathe with me,” Akaashi nods, blinking away the tears. 

It takes a while, but Kuroo lets Akaashi take his time. When that was over, the guilt settles in. If it weren’t for him, then Akaashi wouldn’t have had a panic attack. 

Maybe he shouldn’t have brought it up… but it was hard to ignore, how Akaashi would suddenly run off, and there would be times that he would come back and be sort of loopy. He would always be clutching something in his hand when he left, and when he would come back, his hand would be empty. 

“Would you like some water?” He nods. “I’ll go get you some.” 

Akaashi had a jug under his bed, but he needed to collect his thoughts for a moment, so he lets him leave. 

If Kuroo knew what the pills were for, then there was no denying the situation. What was he supposed to say, that he was a druggie? As if that sounded any better than telling the truth. 

The pills wouldn’t tell Kuroo what kind of epilepsy he had, per say, but the dose and the variety of the medication would hint that it’s a more critical kind, out of the sort. But still. Akaashi couldn’t bring himself to tell the whole truth. Not yet. 

Kuroo comes back with the glass of water, and Akaashi mutters a quiet thank you. He down the water, and holds it in his lap. 

“Whenever you’re ready.” Kuroo says, plopping down on Kenma’s bed across from him. 

There’s a fragility to Akaashi’s state at the moment, and it was so different from the usual, composed one Kuroo always saw. His shoulders were hunched up to his ears, and he kept fiddling with his hands.

Akaashi clears his throat, and looks up at Kuroo only to find no trace of the usual smirk on his features, which was instead replaced by a patience- an openness that hadn’t been there before. 

So, Akaashi talks. “I’m sure you know what those pills mean, Kuroo-san. I have… epilepsy. Oikawa-san and Iwaizumi-san are the only other people that know. 

The rattling you heard in my drawer the other day, those are all of my medications. Why I always cook for myself… it’s a diet I have to follow, which proves to be a nuisance whenever I go out with you all, since I can’t just eat the first thing I lay eyes on. It’s not like I wanted Oikawa-san, or anyone for that matter, to find out anyway. The circumstances forced me to.” He leaves out the part where he was playing the piano in a fit of rage and initial disbelief at his newfound emotions. “There was no one else around, so I prompted him, and he took care of it.” 

Kuroo absorbs the information. “And Miya?” 

Oh. Miya. Akaashi forgot about him. “Ah. He knows as well. See, yesterday wasn’t a very good one,” _Save for the last bit,_ “I woke up and my hands were all twitchy and I took my medication late, so class was an absolute shit-fest. Now that I think about it, I don’t know why I didn’t just go ahead and tell sensei, but I asked him if I could go to the bathroom and stumbled across Miya-san on the way there. He’d seen me earlier, after I was struggling to open a water bottle so that I could take my pills. I didn’t get to warn him that time, just asked him to bring me to the bathroom, where I seized. Miya-san forced me to buy him food as a form of my gratitude. Shameless, almost.” _Just like Oikawa._

“Okay, but why haven’t you told Kenma or Bo, yet? Them in particular, considering you spend the most time with them both.” 

“It hasn’t come up.”

“Meaning you haven’t had to keel over yet whenever you’re around them, which is some fucking miracle by the way- so, what? You’re just going to wait for that moment to happen where they’re thoroughly unprepared, which could just cost your life by the way, and they have to feel guilty for it? That’s fucked.” Kuroo says, and Akaashi winces at the harshness of it. But someone had to tell him. 

“That’s… exactly why I haven’t told them. I’m… scared. That they won’t like the responsibility that comes with being my friend. Then they’ll just up and leave. –And frankly speaking, I’m not ready for that yet. Not again.” Akaashi hates how desperate he sounds. 

“That’s incredibly selfish of you.” 

“Well fuck, Kuroo-san. I didn’t know that.” 

“No one, is going to leave you, Akaashi.” And Akaashi, logically thinking, know this. Yet he’s having a difficult time wrapping his mind around the concept. But he also knows, that had it not been for the fact that Akaashi is going to die sooner than the rest of them, that maybe, his friends wouldn’t have left. 

“Look, I don’t wanna sound like a dick here, but if we’re going to be friends, you need to trust us. Trust that we’ll be able to help you when you need it, and trust that we won’t be abandoning you. And I know it’s not as easy as it fucking sounds, because clearly- you’ve had some kind of emotional trauma or whatever, but you need to _try.”_

Akaashi stares at him for a moment, then nods. 

“Okay?” 

“Okay.” 

“Wasn’t that line from some shitty American novel?” 

“I believe it was The Fault in Our Stars.” 

“Gross.” Kuroo makes a face and stands. “Well, I’m going to go away for a bit, I’m sure you’re royally pissed at me at the moment- but that’s my role in our little  
friend circle. The jackass that means well. So- see ya later.” 

Akaashi stares at the wall behind Kuroo’s body as he stands, and a thought pops into his mind. “Kuroo-san,” He says, and said guy whips back around by the door. “Yep?” 

“Your hair looks like it needs a fix. I would advise you to go brush your teeth while you’re at it.” The latter bit referring to when Kuroo had been helping him earlier.

Kuroo grins and doesn’t miss a beat. “Fuck you.”

\---- 

Akaashi just kind of sits there, for a while, and ponders over what Kuroo had said. He can’t deny that he did feel a little bit better, knowing that someone else from the group knows… well sort of, about his situation.

However, despite the fact that he knows that Kuroo meant no harm, and it probably did Akaashi some good for someone to outright tell him that it wasn’t very safe for other people not to know, he was still mad. 

He was mad that Kuroo had been right, and mad at himself for being so careless as to leave his pills on the dresser. He clicks his tongue against the roof of his mouth. 

Now, there were only Bokuto and Kenma left to tell. At the moment, he feels obligated to tell them, because it would be a shit move to just leave them out of the loop like that, and what Kuroo said had made sense (all of it did) but particularly the bit where he said that he stays with the two of them the most. 

He runs his hands down his face, because _fuck_ it was too early to be dealing with any of this shit.

He stands up and heads over to the bathroom, splashing cold water over his face. He takes his own advice and fixes his hair, as well as brushes his teeth. 

Today, his body felt… relatively normal. Key word: relative. There was still a fuzziness about his surroundings, but it was definitely better than yesterday. There’s a small voice at the back of his mind, a whisper, that reminds him that he’s probably due for another appointment with Ukai, but he pushes it away for later. Which is a fucking dumb thing to do, but Akaashi finds himself doing more and more things that his usual self wouldn’t.

It’s probably because of the fact that his parents weren’t breathing down his neck about every little thing he did. But with that- came a tendency for him to neglect himself, which is the worst thing he could possibly do in his current condition, and he doesn’t even have an excuse for it. Just that he was really, really, irresponsible. 

Next, he makes his way over to the kitchen, where Oikawa sits, his laptop open in front of him and a cup of coffee in his hands. “Good morning, Aka-chan? What’s the matter?” He asks, noticing the tenseness to his shoulders and the stiffness to his movements. Not to mention, his eyes seemed slightly glassy. 

“I hope you slept, Oikawa-san.” 

“Unfortunately, I did. What a waste of my time.” He tsks, and sips from his cup. “So? Why do you look like satan just spat you out?” 

“Is satan synonymous with Kuroo?” 

“What?” Oikawa says, his cup hovering near his mouth, but it was more of a statement than a question. 

“I left my pills on my dresser, he found them this morning.” 

“Then what?”

“Well, I panicked, and then I explained it to him, afterwards which he scolded me.” 

“What for?” 

“Not telling Bokuto-san. Or Kenma-san.” 

“But that’s your choice.” 

“But he reminded me that this choice I made, to not tell them, could potentially cost me my life- not to mention, the immense guilt they have to feel when I… have an episode and they aren’t prepared. Which, in that case, is completely my fault, so.” 

“Well shit. I need to stop forgetting that Kuroo isn’t a complete dumbass all the time.” 

“That’s something I need to start remembering.” Akaashi huffs, and looks into their fridge, which by the way- surprise surprise, is empty. Save for some random cauliflower. He takes it out of the fridge and sets it down on the counter. 

“Is that… a cauliflower?” 

“Yep.” He looks for a cutting board and a knife. He also pulls out a pan.  
“Can I just say, I absolutely despise vegetables. But for some reason, whenever you cook it, it’s always fucking delicious.” 

“Does Iwaizumi-san not cook for you?” 

“Iwa-chan? Please. He knows how to cook like, three things.” 

“Maybe I should teach him how to cook a thing or two.” 

“What? Why would you need to do that? It’s not like you’re going anywhere anytime soon.” Oikawa laughs, and Akaashi pauses in his movements. 

“Right.” He mutters, and begins to chop up the cauliflower. 

Bokuto enters the kitchen in that moment, yawning. “Mornin’.” He rasps. His voice still heavy with sleep. It’s probably the hottest thing Akaashi’s ever heard. But he doesn’t tell him that.

“Hi, Bo-chan!” 

“Morning.” Akaashi risks a glance at Bokuto and regrets it immediately. His hair was down, the hair gel having worn out from him tossing and turning in his sleep, and now lay flat just above his eyes. He was wearing a rather loose-fitted muscle-tee along with some sweatpants. What the fuck. Akaashi was tempted to just take the knife and blind himself. 

“Is Iwaizumi hanging with us tomorrow?” 

“Yeah, I think so!” 

“Hey, Akaashi, is tomorrow the day you finally toss to me?” 

“Sorry?” 

“Iwaizumi’s coming over tomorrow, we figured it would be fun to play a game or two.” 

“I’m a little rough around the edges.” 

“It’s cool! We can go to the gym later and maybe we can practice, or something.” 

Akaashi glances at him, unsure, but Bokuto looks so eager and it’s _cute_ and _fuck_ he’s so weak. 

“I suppose I can go, but don’t say I didn’t warn you.” Akaashi replies, his eyes trained on the vegetable in front of him instead of looking at Bokuto, because he just knows that he has the most brilliant grin on his face at the moment. 

After eating breakfast and taking his medication, Akaashi goes back to his dorm with the promise of meeting up later on to practice. Kenma is back in the room, lounging on his bed. 

“Hi.” Kenma says, his eyes never leaving his screen even for a moment. 

“Hello.” 

“You don’t have any classes today, do you?” 

“No, but Bokuto-san is insisting on me joining them for a game tomorrow with Iwaizumi-san, but it’s been a while since I’ve played so I’m going to try and get some practice in.” 

Kenma hums. 

“Kenma-san, you used to play didn’t you?” 

Kenma finally looks up from his laptop. “Yeah, but I haven’t touched a volleyball ever since classes started.” 

“I haven’t touched a volleyball since my first year of high school. I’m afraid I’m going to look like an absolute imbecile tomorrow.” 

“I’m sure you’re not bad.”

As far as Akaashi could remember, he wasn’t an outstanding player, but his coach said he had potential. Then again, everyone has potential. 

“Kenma-san, do you think, maybe you could…” 

“Help?”

Akaashi nods, looking sheepish. 

“Sure. But my technique isn’t very good, I usually rely on my game sense more during a game. Why not ask Tooru?” Kenma asks, confused. He didn’t think he was anything stellar. 

Though embarrassed, Akaashi admits that Oikawa intimidates him. Not personally, but in the context of volleyball, Oikawa was a completely different person. Even through a computer screen, you could feel the raw determination and confidence he had in himself- rather, his complete confidence in his teammates. 

Kenma hums. “I suppose I see where you’re coming from. I don’t think I would have liked to go up against them in high school. Had it not been for Shiratorizawa, maybe we could have stood on the same court.” 

“Oikawa-san’s never been to nationals?” Akaashi asks, surprised.

“Well, not until recently. He got scouted in one of his first games sometime last year, when he was just on the uni team. If I’m not mistaken, he arrived here on a scholarship. But he was pretty well-known even before that.” 

“Oh?”  
“Yeah. A friend of mine from Sendai made me watch their match against each other when Tooru was still in high school- Hinata, and dare I say it, Oikawa was… something else. Him and Iwaizumi- their whole team, the amount of trust they had in each other, how well they worked together…” Kenma shakes his head. “If Oikawa was great in high school, he might as well be _divine_ at this point. And he still has so much room to develop.” 

“Do you happen to have any videos?” 

With a few quick presses of the keyboard, Kenma pulls up the video, angling the screen a little off to the side and making room for Akaashi to sit with him on the bed. 

Akaashi takes his place beside Kenma, eyes trained on the screen. “Someone made a compilation of the highlights from the matches.” 

The video was posted 2 and a half years ago, and the first thing Akaashi sees is Oikawa, clothed in the turquoise and white of his old uniform. The whistle goes off, and the angle changes, a close-up of Oikawa’s face. He watches him take a deep breath, his eyes shining with vigilance. He does his run-up, and leaps into the air. The shot is zoomed out this time. Akaashi watches his perfect form, and the way he seems to freeze mid-air, before his arm comes down and the ball is gone before he could even blink.

Akaashi blinks repeatedly, not exactly sure what he just witnessed. 

“Yeah.” Kenma says. 

The next shot is in an aerial view. The ball soars over the net and over to Seijoh’s side, where their libero picks it up and Oikawa takes it from there, swiftly moving into position underneath the ball, and sending it to number four- Iwaizumi. 

A puff of air leaves Akaashi’s lips. “I’m supposed to be playing against _that?”_

The next clip is of Oikawa grinning at Iwaizumi, who’s face is calm, and unmoving. Then, he looks through the net, over to the other side, and Oikawa’s smile shifts into something more competitive, well-aware of the capabilities of his teammates. 

All Akaashi’s ever done over the last 3 years was watch games. Sometimes, over and over again, and mentally reconstructs the game- imagining what he would do if he was the setter. He had always wanted to know what if the decisions he’d made would win them a point. If it would win them a set. Then a game. But he never could, fully picture it- his team mates faceless.

Guess he’ll find out tomorrow. 

“This is ridiculous.” Akaashi says, watching the setter and the ace moving in blurs of turquoise across the screen, movements quick and practiced, never faltering. 

“Do you know how many people would kill to have the chance to ask Tooru a question? A lot. The chance is right there for you to take. Plus, Tooru likes to fight on what he would call equal ground. Not to belittle you or anything, but his game with you tomorrow is most-likely going to be boring.” 

“I have no doubt in my mind that Oikawa-san and Iwaizumi-san are going to beat me. But I also have Bokuto-san, and that puts me at ease. Kind of.” 

“How long has it been since you’ve exercised?” 

“…Not for a while.” 

“Good luck. Koutarou has the weirdest stamina ever. It’s endless.”

“That doesn’t sound that unusual.” 

“No, when I mean weird- It’s like, he hasn’t had the time to rest, whatsoever, and he’s just… not tired. Though, that doesn’t necessarily guarantee his play.” 

“What do you mean?” 

“When Bokuto plays, he gets into these… moods. It’s hard to gauge his breaking point, and it differs from time to time. While Kou, physically- is obstinate, mentally, he’s very capricious.” 

“It doesn’t seem so when I watch him on TV.” 

“He’s gotten better, over the years. I’m proud of him for that.” Kenma leaves it at that, but Akaashi sees his eyes shake and the way his hand curls into a fist on the keyboard. “So, back to the topic of practicing. Are you sure you want my help?” 

“Any help would be great.” 

“I really think you should ask Tooru for help.” 

Akaashi rolls his lips in. 

“Okay, clearly you’re not going to be doing that. Just don’t expect much from me.” 

 

Akaashi takes a ball from the cart, the leather feeling distantly familiar underneath his fingertips. He tests it out a few times, hitting the ball against the floor. Then, he hits the ball so that it rebounds off the wall and back into his waiting hand. His arm was weak, but it was a start. 

Kenma stretches, watching Akaashi closely. Bokuto is radiating excitement as he watches the raven warm-up. 

Akaashi frowns at the lack of force, but what did he expect from not playing for so long. The next time the ball comes toward him, he catches it, having an idea. He twists and takes note of the cart a few feet behind him, and takes note of its position. 

Licking his lips, he positions the ball over his head, positioning his fingers, and tosses it in the air a few times. It feels awkward, in some way, but as of the moment, it can’t be helped.

He tries for the cart, missing it by a few inches. 

_Too far right,_ he says, walking over and retrieving the ball. He resumes his previous position, adjusting his arms and the alignment of his feet ever so slightly. He tosses the ball again, and the ball lands closer to the cart, but still not within it. 

_Just a little bit more._ He repeats what he did a moment ago, and this time, it goes in. He smiles in satisfaction. It wasn’t much, but it felt gratifying. He tries tossing into the cart again a few more times, and succeeds. 

Bokuto whoops, arms raised over his head, a grin on his face. Akaashi wonders what it would be like once he actually tosses to him. 

Kuroo has also, made an appearance, sitting next to Kenma on the bench, his arms stretched out behind him and the usual look on his face. The blond stands up from the bench, walking over to Akaashi.

Kenma walks up to Akaashi and tells him that his form is off, realigning certain parts of his body.

Oikawa enters the gym silently, unsurprised to see other people there. He watches as Kenma helps Akaashi moving over to where Bokuto and Kuroo are. “Yaho! What’s going on?” 

“Akaashi’s practicing. Do you mind giving me some tosses, Oikawa?” Bokuto says. 

“Oh? Aka-chan is really going to play tomorrow?” Oikawa asks, a crease forming in between his eyebrows at all the possible outcomes it could bring. 

“Yeah! I’m pretty excited, I can’t wait to see what his tosses are like.” 

“Please, even if they were absolute shit you’d still say they were the best tosses in the world.” Kuroo deadpans. 

“You’re not wrong there!” Bokuto laughs, his hands on his hips. 

“Have you warmed up yet, Oikawa?” 

“I did a little stretching then jogged here.” 

“Not enough, do some more.” Bokuto insists. 

Oikawa rolls his eyes. “Honestly, I’m-“ 

“Oikawa.” The few times that Bokuto is actually serious, it’s bone-chilling. It’s such an out of place look on his face. His stare is unnerving. 

“Okay, okay! Scary, Bo-chan is scary.” 

“Bokuto, scary? Please.” Kuroo says, though he himself knows that he’s lying. If needed, Bokuto could be pretty intimidating when he wanted to be. 9/10 times he  
looks laughable though. 

While Oikawa is stretching, Akaashi is listening intently to everything that Kenma has to say.

“Use your arms more.” “Fix your footing.” “Your shoulders are too tense.” 

When Kenma is done with the physical corrections, he calls Kuroo over. “Kuro.” Is all he has to say, and he’s there in a heartbeat. 

This is when Akaashi notices Oikawa’s presence. Oh well. If he was here, then what could he do? 

“Keiji.” Kenma calls, and when Akaashi looks over, him and Kuroo are by the net. “Stand by the back line then throw the ball.” 

Akaashi goes where he’s told wordlessly, and with a nod from Kenma, he throws the ball into the air. Akaashi watches as Kenma’s eyes follow the ball, moving into position underneath it, extends his arms above him, and jumps. Kuroo hits it easily. 

Akaashi almost calls Kenma a liar. While he may not be an expert, he knows good technique when he sees it. 

Oikawa, who finishes with his warm-ups, speaks. “Kenma has been setting for Kuroo since forever. He doesn’t have to give it much thought. But when you’re setting, it’s important to remember that it isn’t the same for everyone. As a setter, it’s your job to know your team-mates. You have to take note of every single detail. Their strengths and weaknesses, their habits. What they do and don’t like.” 

Oikawa walks over to the cart, and grabs a ball. Kenma catches it upon reflex when he throws it at him, and moves towards the back line, where Bokuto is waiting. Akaashi’s mouth goes dry upon seeing Bokuto in his practice clothes, this being the first time he’s gotten a proper look at him.

Resentfully, he tears his eyes away from Bokuto’s form. Akaashi watches Oikawa, not daring to speak up.

Kenma throws the ball into the air, and Oikawa grins like a predator might look at his prey. Bokuto starts on his run-up. Oikawa sets the ball, making it look as if it were the easiest thing in the world. Bokuto slams the ball on the other side of the net, the impact resounding loudly in Akaashi’s ears. Hell, was that an echo? 

Oikawa smiles at Akaashi, though it’s different from his usual one. It occurs to Akaashi that this is the same smile that Oikawa has shown in many matches. “What makes a setter great isn’t immaculate technique or ultra-fast tosses,” He says, sounding bitter. “That’s only a part of it. If you can’t cater to your team mates, then all your talent goes to waste. A true setter is someone who’s able to bring out the absolute 100% from the people around them.”

Oikawa pauses, and picks up the ball that has made its way near him. “Now that,” He says, heading towards the back like. Almost immediately, everyone steers clear of the way. “Is why I won’t lose.” Akaashi gets the feeling that Oikawa isn’t talking to him anymore. 

With that, he serves. 

Akaashi shakes his head, lips parted. That was when he decides that everyone around him in that moment, was way out of his league.

 

Around lunch time, Kenma is the first to give in. “I’m hungry.” 

Akaashi almost sighs with relief. Oikawa had been drilling him for the past 3 hours.Having to tell him to stop staring a number of times. 

“Stop ogling Bokuto and focus.” 

“I wasn’t ogling.” 

“Sure you weren’t.”

Akaashi couldn’t help it though. Bokuto was so… distracting.

But of course, he didn’t neglect asking Akaashi if he was doing alright from time to time. “Tell me if you feel off, okay?” Oikawa worries. But after the younger  
insisted that he was fine, he continued on with the exercises. 

Akaashi watches as Bokuto lines up to practice another jump serve. He watches the way the muscles of his legs tense when he leaps off of the floor, the broadness of his shoulders, the sturdiness of his arms. He watches the look of elation that presents itself on Bokuto’s face when he sees that the ball lands within bounds. -And when he pumps a fist in the air at his success, Akaashi can’t help but smile, himself.

Kuroo of course, stops whatever he’s doing upon hearing his boyfriend.. “I don’t know about the rest of you guys, but food sounds good right about now.” 

“I’m kind of craving sushi right now.” Akaashi mutters. 

“Aka-chan says he wants sushi!” Oikawa announces, knowing that he had a diet to follow.

“Hey, that actually doesn’t sound too bad.” Kuroo agrees, remembering what Akaashi had told him earlier that morning. 

“I can _roll_ with that!” Bokuto says, and a shared glance with Kuroo has them in a fit of laughter. 

Akaashi chokes back his laughter, because it really wasn’t _that_ funny. But it was funny seeing how amused Bokuto was with himself. 

“Did you seriously just laugh at that?” Oikawa cries out, his nose upturned in distaste. 

“No I didn’t.” 

“You totally did!” 

“I didn’t.” Akaashi says seriously. 

“I’m leaving.” Kenma announces, turning towards the door. 

“Hey, wait for me!” Kuroo says, and runs up beside Kenma, slinging an arm around his boyfriend’s shoulder. 

Bokuto walks over to Akaashi. “You’re doing great, ‘Kaashi!” 

“Thank you, Bokuto-san.” 

“Did you see my serve just now? It was great, wasn’t it?” 

“Much impressive.” Akaashi reaffirms, and the grin Bokuto gives him is blinding. He considers wearing shades whenever he hangs out around the taller man. 

“Oh my god, can you save the flirting for later?” 

“With all due respect, Oikawa-san, but you and Iwaizumi-san aren’t much better. And I wasn’t flirting.” 

“Yeah, ‘Kaashi wasn’t flirting, I was!” Bokuto protests, as if that sounded better. 

Akaashi spins around, and walks away, his hand holding the back of his neck held up by the back of his other hand.

Oikawa is familiar with the body language, and laughs. “For once, Bokuto- you were smooth.” 

“What? But I didn’t even do anything!” Bokuto insists, confused. 

Oikawa laughs even harder at that.

 

Kuroo suggests a sushi bar a little away from campus, and they bump into Sugawara somewhere along the way. 

“Oh thank God, Koushi! Now I won’t be left to 5th wheel!” Oikawa wails, and launches himself at the silver-haired man. 

“Ew, Tooru! You’re all gross and sweaty!’ Sugawara protests, but allows himself to be hugged, anyway. 

Oikawa detaches himself from the smaller man, slinging an arm around his shoulder. Oikawa whispers into his ear, all the while looking at Akaashi, a devilish smirk on his face. 

Why does Akaashi feel mildly violated.

“So ‘Kaashi! Will you be tossing to me later?”

“I don’t know.” 

“Why not answer a solid yes? C’mon!” 

“Because I don’t want to embarrass myself.” Translation: Akaashi wants to give Bokuto the best fucking toss he’s ever come to spike in his entire life. He wasn’t  
going to disappoint him like that, especially after he’s looked forward to this for so long. 

“I’ll hit any toss you give me!” 

“We’ll see, Bokuto-san.” 

Bokuto groans loudly, his shoulders slumping and his head dropping. 

“Bokuto-san?” 

Bokuto crosses his arms over his chest and hmphs. Had he done something wrong? 

“If it’s any reconciliation, I’m looking forward to setting for you.” Akaashi says, reluctant as to whether or not he should continue. “I really do think you’re an outstanding player. I’d hate to disgrace that.” 

“What?” Bokuto says, looking at Akaashi in astonishment. 

“I don’t think my tosses are quite ready yet.” 

Bokuto gives in, because it’s _Akaashi._

“I hope you aren’t planning on backing out last minute, I’ve been looking forward to this for so long!” 

Of course Akaashi knew that. Bokuto never failed to ask him if he would toss to him. “Are you guilt-tripping me, Bokuto-san?” 

“Of course not!” Bokuto’s voice is a little too loud as he says so. He side-eyes Akaashi. “Is it working?” 

Yes. “No.” 

“I’m sorry to interrupt, but I believe we haven’t had the chance to have a proper conversation. Everyone here has managed to become your friend to some extent, what about me?” 

“What would you like to know?” 

“Anything.” 

“Oh, no. You have to ask him a direct question, Suga. ‘Kaashi doesn’t know where to start with himself. There’re too many good things.” 

“Oh my god!” Sugawara squeals. “Enough.” Oikawa exclaims. 

Akaashi struggles to maintain his composure. He merely takes a deep breath. 

“Thank you, Bokuto-san. But he’s right, Suga-san, I don’t like talking about myself very much.” 

“That’s fine!” Sugawara smiles, and Akaashi, strangely enough, feels himself relax. Sugawara had a nice smile. _Though, it wasn’t quite like Bo-“_ Akaashi stops himself right there. 

“If you don’t mind me asking, Suga-san, what are you here for?” 

“Me? I’m studying to be a vet!” 

“That’s interesting-“ 

“It's because Suga is actually a furry.” Kuroo interrupts. Bokuto chokes on his laughter, and Akaashi rolls his lips in prevent himself from laughing. 

The smile slips off of Suga’s face upon hearing Kuroo. He tips forward to look at him. “I fucking hate you.”

“Don’t kink-shame, Kuroo. Gosh.” Oikawa rolls his eyes jokingly. Then lets out a loud cackle afterwards. Suga shoves his limb from his shoulder, glaring. 

Kenma huffs out a laugh, much to his dismay. 

Finally, they turn into a little alleyway, a sign hanging off the side of the building. Kuroo pushes the door open, the rest of them filing inside. 

The place is dimly lit, giving it a comfortable atmosphere. On the left are some booths, and to the right is a bar. 

“Nekomata-san! It’s your favorite customer!” Kuroo announces. A few seconds later, a man, well in his years, appears behind the counter.

“Tetsurou! It’s nice to see you again.” 

“You know Kenma, my boyfriend.” Kuroo grins. “I brought a few of my other friends with me today. This is Oikawa, Sugawara, Bokuto, and the newest addition, Akaashi.” 

“Oh? A group date, huh?” 

“What?” Suga says, the same time Oikawa exclaims. “Ew!” 

“Hey!” 

“No offence, Suga-chan, you’re very cute.”

“Thank you.” Sugawara replies. 

“But definitely _not_ cuter than Iwa-chan.” 

“Well if that’s the case, you’re too flamboyant for my liking.” 

“That’s my charm!” Oikawa says, his hair bouncing. 

“Definitely not.

“You’re so mean to me!” Oikawa whines, prolonging the ‘e.’ 

“I’m kidding, you know I love you.” Sugawara laughs, bumping his hip with Oikawa’s who pouts. 

Nekomata watches with mild amusement. “You’re friendship is very cute.” 

Oikawa and Sugawara momentarily stop with their antics. “Thank you!” 

The old man turns to Bokuto and Akaashi. “And you two?” 

“We’re friends.” Akaashi provides, curtly. 

Bokuto is quick to add, “For the time being!” Everyone in the group smirks, save for Akaashi who merely looks straight ahead, despite the feeling of his stomach  
flipping over. 

Akaashi still isn’t sure whether or not it’s a good or a bad feeling. It’s good, because it’s Bokuto, but it’s bad because it’s _Bokuto._

They sit in the booth farthest away from the door, and receive a menu, each. 

“We have a promo going on if you’re interested. If you upsize your ramen, you get it for cheaper. It’s a pretty big bowl, I’d say it’s good for two.” 

“Ah, Nekomata-san, you’re the coolest.”

“I’ll be back in a bit to get your orders.” He says, then disappears into the kitchen.

“Kenma, d’you wanna share?” 

“Yeah, that’s fine.”

“Okay, so…” 

Oikawa and Sugawara decide on doing the same.

“Do you just wanna share too?” 

“I’m okay with that.” 

“Okay, what are you down for?” 

Akaashi tries to ignore how close Bokuto has moved, even though they had the _same_ damn menu. “Nothing spicy.” 

“Why not?” 

Akaashi was the weakest bitch when it came to spicy food, if he was being honest. It was kind of embarrassing, how bad he was when it came to eating it. But it’s  
not like he could’ve eaten it if he liked it anyway, spicy food was a no-no for his diet. 

“I’m not very good at eating spicy food.” 

“Really?” Bokuto asks, surprised. He feels Akaashi nod beside him. 

“That’s fine! How about the Miso Ramen?” 

“That’s alright with me.” 

“Are you sure?” 

“Yes, Bokuto-san.” 

“Okay.” 

Looking at the description, he purses his lips upon seeing that it has beef in it. He supposes he could just leave it for Bokuto to eat. Ramen noodles are… carbs.  
2 things he shouldn’t be eating.

“What kind of sushi do you guys wanna order?” Kuroo speaks up, from his corner. 

“I want Maki.” Kenma tells him. 

“Nigiri, for me.” Akaashi provides. It has rice, but it’s fine because it’s in small amounts. 

“Their Anago here is pretty good, so we can get that too.” Kuroo says. 

“I want Chakin sushi.” 

“I bet you only want it because it’s cute.” Sugawara snarks. 

“Shut up, Koushi.” Oikawa retorts.

“Well, they have 8 pieces per serving, so are you guys fine with all that? Anyway, we could always order again if it isn’t enough.” 

Everyone agrees just as Nekomata comes back to the table. “Are you all ready to order?” He says, as he sets down the tray with their glasses and tea.

They relay their orders once more. “Okay, I’ll be back with your food.” The group thanks him, and he smiles before leaving once more.

“Wait! I forgot, can I get one serving of Mapo tofu? Extra spicy.” Sugawara grins, and Nekomata writes it down. “Will do.” 

Sugawara clenches his fists. _“Yes._ Though, it sounded more like ‘yis.’

“You like Mapo tofu _that_ much, Suga-san?” 

“I love Mapo tofu! For me, it’s like, that one food that restores my faith in humanity again.” 

Akaashi chuckles, sipping from his tea cup. 

“For me, it’s-“

“Milk bread.” Everyone at the table says, not letting Oikawa finish his sentence. Even Akaashi joined in. 

“Apple pie.” Kenma pipes. Akaashi makes a mental note of that to save for later. 

“I’m a slut for grilled mackerel.” Kuroo adds.

Kenma sighs. “Why do you have to phrase things that way.” 

“For me, I really like-“ 

“Yakiniku.” Majority of the table finishes, save for Kuroo, whom of course takes the opportunity to tease his best friend. “Akaashi.” 

He feels Bokuto freeze up beside him, before relaxing. “Well, you’re not wrong there.” Then grins. Akaashi gurgles into the cup near his mouth, surprised, the tea he was sipping on spraying on his face. He frowns. Gross. It was also really unbecoming of him to do so. Damn Bokuto. Oikawa and Sugawara laugh loudly upon seeing him.

Kuroo grins at him from across the table. Akaashi really wants to jerk the cup in his direction. “I’d be careful if I were you, Kuroo-san.” He says, narrowing his eyes briefly. Kuroo doesn’t let up. 

“You know, I’ve been wondering, do you think Sugawara could handle some good ol’ wasabi?” Kuroo asks. 

“Wasabi?” Sugawara snorts. “Please.” 

“Have you done it before?” Bokuto asks.

“Are you kidding? Of course I have. I was team mates with Tanaka and Nishinoya, y’know. Their heads are filled with a shit-ton of stupid ideas.” 

“How was it?” 

“Well for me, it was like, okay. Nothing a glass of water couldn’t fix. But Nishinoya was adamant that he could handle it. It was really bad. His eyes watered so much, and he had snot coming out of his nose, for like, an hour.” 

“No way. I don’t believe that you didn’t cry.” 

“See for yourself later!” Sugawara smiles, not worried in the slightest. 

“That’s wild.” Kuroo notes.

“Everything is always wild with those two around.” Suga shakes his head upon remembering his previous team mates. 

They continue talking until the food arrives, Akaashi answering whenever asked a question. Bokuto laughed a lot, and it resonated within him. Akaashi could listen to him laugh all the time. The voice that Akaashi had found too boisterous for his liking at first, is something that had grown on him. Bokuto just _  
glowed._ Akaashi found himself staring over the rim of his cup, his eyes trained on the man beside him. 

He noticed the roundness of his cheekbones, and the way the light bounced off of them. He watched how his eyelashes would flutter whenever he blinked, and how expressive his eyebrows were. He saw the line of his jaw move as he talked. 

There was no arguing with the fact that Bokuto was… very nice to look at. 

Akaashi really was in trouble.

Nekomata appears, his arms lined with trays of food. He sets each tray down with practiced grace, laughing when everyone at the table sat up a little straighter and breathed in the scent of the delicious food. 

_”Itadakimasu!”_ Every one choruses. 

“Would you like anything else?” 

Kuroo replies through a mouthful of food. “As of now, I think we’re good Nekomata-san.” He raises a thumb up at the end of his sentence. 

“Okay, just call me if you boys need anything else.” 

“We sure will! Thank you, Nekomata-san.” 

“My pleasure.” 

Bokuto and Akaashi take turns when eating the noodles. “You can have the beef, Bokuto-san.” 

“A-Akaashi! Are you sure?” 

The younger nods just as he places another mouthful of noodles into his mouth. 

Bokuto almost wails, wrapping his arms around the smaller man and rocking them side to side briefly before devouring his meat. 

“Bokuto-san, slow down, you might choke.” Akaashi chides. 

“Bokuto never chokes, if you get what I’m saying.” Kuroo winks, placing a piece of sushi in his mouth. 

Akaashi gives him a blank look. Jackass. 

“Okay! The moment of truth!” Sugawara yells, holding up his chopsticks for everyone to see the dollop of green paste. 

“Holy shit, he’s actually going to do it!” Bokuto scrambles for his phone in his pocket. 

“Of course I am! I’m not a pussy.”

Akaashi lets out a surprised laugh, not expecting Suga to speak in such a manner. He doesn’t notice the look that Bokuto spares him once he did so. 

“Okay, okay- go.” Bokuto pushes. 

“It’s filming?” Suga clarifies. 

“Yes, yes! Go!” The camera shakes a little.

Sugawara places the chopsticks in his mouth, and for a moment, the whole table is still. He swallows, and smiles at the camera, proceeding to eat his food normally. 

“What the fuck?” Kuroo screams, just before the time runs out in the video. 

“I told you!” Sugawara grins. 

“This is rigged, man. I don’t believe this.” Bokuto shakes his head in awe. Akaashi is too, impressed. Kenma’s eyes are wide for a moment before going back to  
slurping his noodles.

“Kou-chan, you sure are a mutant.” Oikawa pipes.

“Shut up, Tooru. If I’m a mutant that means you’re obsessed with me. You and your alien shit,” 

“Hey! Aliens don’t deserve this!” And the two of them were back to bickering. 

Akaashi shakes his head. They were all so strange. 

Bokuto was eating away at his noodles happily, eating the most of it. Not that Akaashi had minded, there was still sushi. And seeing the content look on Bokuto’s face made it even more than okay. 

Akaashi finished off the last of his sushi, and looks over at Bokuto, who was finishing off the remnants of the soup. 

“Hey Bo, have some of this.” Kuroo offers up a piece of Anago, resting innocently on the chopsticks. Akaashi eyes Kuroo, feeling that something was off.  
Bokuto eats just about anything that’s given to him, so he eats it willingly. A moment later, his eyes widen and he starts to sputter, coughing violently. Akaashi  
quickly hands him a glass of water. 

_”You-“ cough. “p-piece of-“ cough. “shit!”_

Kuroo looks at his best friend from across the table innocently. “What did I do?” 

Sugawara watches, Bokuto, concerned. “What happened?” 

Bokuto coughs. “W-wasabi.” Is all he had to say. 

“Kuroo!” Oikawa sputters, trying not to laugh.

Akaashi sighs. He should have known that Kuroo would be up to something like that. He absentmindedly circles his hand on Bokuto’s back, which mind you- was  
very _broad_ The raven pushes the thought out of his head for now and focuses on Bokuto, urging him to drink water.

Suga ‘tsks’. He hits Kuroo upside the head. Hard. 

_”Ow!_ Kuroo yelps. 

Kenma watches Bokuto carefully, who’s eyes were starting to water. Bokuto did look… well, funny. But he wasn’t going to laugh. He twists Kuroo’s ear with his hand. 

“Ouch! Kenma!” Kuroo whines, dragging out his name. 

Bokuto laguhs too, even though his nose was starting to run. “Fuck, I’m actually crying.” 

“At least it wasn’t Tooru. Tooru is _so_ ugly when he cries.” Suga snickers.

“Stop bullying me, Koushi.” Oikawa pouts. 

Akaashi gestures for Kenma to pass him a tissue, who does so quietly. He laughs a little, seeing how red-rimmed Bokuto’s eyes have gotten. He presses the tissue gently onto his face. Bokuto laughs, holding the tissue. “Thanks, ‘Kaashi.” Once he’s done, Akaashi takes it from him, which was probably gross, but he was feeling petty. Bokuto looks at him questioningly. 

Kuroo is too busy laughing, his mouth open. Akaashi stands up steadily and places the tissue into the older’s mouth.

Bokuto shouts in surprise, points, then laughs loudly. Kenma’s eyes widen, and he clasps his hands over his mouth, laughing into them. Oikawa and Sugawara gape.

Kuroo spits the tissue out, and clutches the end of the table, eyes wide. “Please don’t tell me that was what I think it was.” 

“I told you to be careful.” He shrugs. “I’m going to the bathroom.” He steps out of the booth. That felt oddly satisfying. Kuroo was so overbearing. 

“He did that!” Suga shrieks. “He _really_ did that!” Oikawa continues, and the two of them burst into a fit of giggles.

Kuroo takes a moment to process the newfound information. “Ohmygod, _ew!”_

Akaashi smirks to himself in satisfaction and recedes into the restroom.

Kuroo has his tongue sticking out, not knowing what to do with himself. “I’m gonna get sick!” 

“Technically, it’s your fault though.” Kenma deadpans. 

_”My_ fault? How is it my fault?” 

“Kuroo, had it not been for that fact that you slipped the wasabi in the Anago, you wouldn’t have had a mouthful of Bokuto’s snot a few moments ago.” Sugawara states, a mater-of-factly. 

“If there’s one thing I’ve learned from my friendship from Aka-chan, it’s to _not_ mess with him.” Oikawa shivers.

Bokuto hasn’t said a word, and is merely grinning to himself. 

“Bo-chan, I’m afraid that if you keep smiling like that, your face is going to split into two.” Oikawa comments. It was cute seeing how happy his friend was. 

Bokuto was happy on the norm, but this was like, a whole new level. 

“I just really like him.” 

“Well, he’d be stupid not to know with how obvious you are.”

Bokuto sees Akaashi comes out of the bathroom, his face as normal looking as ever, but there’s a trace of a smile lingering on his lips. It was subtle, barely even noticeable, but if there was one thing that Bokuto paid attention to the most, it would be Akaashi. 

The more time he spent with him, he was learning.

He learned that Akaashi would roll his lips in too stop himself from laughing, or if that failed he would hide his smile behind his hand, or when he thought no one was looking. He would also absentmindedly press his fingers into the table, as if he was playing something on the piano. Sometimes, he would catch him humming to himself softly. 

After paying for the bill, they all head back to the gym and have a short break. 

Akaashi is still having second-thoughts about tomorrow, he’d really hate to disappoint. He sits on the bench, drinking from his water jug quietly. He feels a weight plop down beside him, and looks over to see Kuroo. 

“I am _so_ going to crush you tomorrow.” He taunts.

“Overconfidence is a dangerous thing, Kuroo-san.” 

“I’m not being overconfident. Just merely stating a fact.” He grins.

Kuroo probably knew that Akaashi was somewhat nervous for tomorrow. He looks over at Kenma, who quickly snaps his head down. He sighs. 

“Okay, but on another note, how are you feeling?” Kuroo’s expression shifts more into something concerned. 

“I’m… okay, I think. But I’m not allowed to overwork myself. I have a tendency to… slip more. If I do that.” He had learned that the hard way. Back in high school, there would be times where he’d have to stay up a little bit late to finish his school work. The day after that was absolute hell.

“Okay. Just… be careful, okay?” 

Akaashi nods, smiling at him slightly. Kuroo was an ass, but he wasn’t a complete ass. 

Oikawa strides over. “Hey, Aka-chan! Is Kuroo talking out of his ass again?” 

“It’s nothing I haven’t grown accustomed to, Oikawa-san.” Akaashi deadpans. He hears Bokuto laugh loudly. He doesn’t look at him. 

“You’re so mean to me Akaashi! I’ll definitely get you for that tomorrow.” Kuroo stands with a newfound energy. “Bo! Let’s do some drills!” 

“Oho?” Bokuto grins, taking his place on one side of the net and Kuroo on the other. “Akaashi! Come and toss for me!”

“I’m a little tired, Bokuto-san.” 

“But-“ 

“I’ll toss for you, Bo-chan!” Oikawa is quick to jump in, already running up beside Bokuto before he could say much more. Akaashi breathes a sigh of relief. 

“Suga-chan, can you throw me some volleyballs?” 

“Sure.” Sugawara says. 

Akaashi takes this time to observe how they play. He’s seen them play of course, but maybe he could manage to gain a little bit more information up close. 

Sugawara throws the ball into the air, and Oikawa takes his place beneath it, angling his body towards Bokuto. He hits it forcefully. 

Kuroo blocks it effortlessly. Akaashi winces at the loud sound it makes, feeling his own arms start to sting. “Ha!” 

“Shut up! It was one block!” 

“One block can turn into many more, my friend.” 

“Seriously? You guys are on the same team now.” Kenma remarks, rolling his eyes. 

Akaashi watches with careful eyes. Especially the way Oikawa would set to Bokuto. He recalls what the setter had said earlier. _“What makes a setter great isn’t immaculate technique or ultra-fast tosses, that’s only a part of it. If you can’t cater to your team mates, then all your talent goes to waste. A true setter is someone who’s able to bring out the absolute 100% from the people around them.”_

Oikawa’s tosses to him are high and away from the net. His spikes have a tendency to lean more towards straights, however his broad-attacks aren’t something to bat an eyelash at. 

_It’s not enough._ He thinks, and pulls out his phone, along with his earphones. This was just a practice and it wasn’t even Bokuto up against a whole team.

If Akaashi wants his tosses to be perfect, he’s going to need to learn everything about him from the start. He searches up Bokuto’s name, looking for earlier videos. 

He clicks one. It was a practice match from a few years back, against a team called Karasuno. He spots a familiar mop of silvery hair, and is surprised to realize that it was Sugawara. 

Bokuto, unsurprisingly, is amazing. 

Akaashi watches, unwavering, as Bokuto performs numerous feints, wipes, and the infamous cut-shot he’s seen so much in recent games. 

He watches video after video, absorbing as much information as he possibly could and before he knows it, hours have passed, and it’s nearing dinner time. He rubs his eyes with the heel of his palm, sore after staring at the screen of his phone for so long. Not to mention, his neck had cramped up, shoulders stiff. He barely notices it when Bokuto peeks over his shoulder, squawking.

Akaashi is startled, nearly dropping his phone. 

“Hey, hey, hey! That’s what you’ve been doing for the past 4 hours? Looking at videos of _me?”_ Bokuto punctuates his sentence with a waggle of his  
eyebrows. 

Akaashi resists the urge to roll his eyes. “Don’t get too far ahead of yourself, Bokuto-san.” 

“Hm? Were you stalking me?” 

“That seems like something you would be more likely to do.” 

“Hey!” The taller pouts.

Akaashi closes his phone and rolls up his earphones. Bokuto was an astounding player, he remarks. But something that he had noticed in a few of the videos is  
that he would be doing great, and then something would happen and he would get subbed out of the game, looking upset. He wondered what that was about. 

Kenma’s words from earlier that morning replay in his head. _“When Bokuto plays, he gets into these… moods. It’s hard to gauge his breaking point, and it differs from time to time. While Kou, physically- is obstinate, mentally, he’s very capricious.”_

Had that been it? Would Akaashi need to deal with one of those mood swings tomorrow? He figures that he would cross the bridge once he got there. He was always good at thinking on his feet. 

“Are you up for some dinner?” Bokuto asks him, and if Akaashi was being honest, he just really wanted a shower. Or a nap. 

“Can we go back to the dorm first?” 

“Sure!” 

True to his word, the 6 of them retreat back to the 2nd floor of their building, all seeking to take a shower. Except for Kenma. Kenma didn’t plan on taking a shower, given that he didn’t exert himself too much. 

Akaashi plops down on his bed, sighing. Today had been a long day. He decides on taking a short nap before his shower and then dinner.

Meanwhile, Bokuto and Kuroo play rock-paper-scissors to decide on who’s going to take a shower first. 

Kuroo wins.

Bokuto groans. 

With Kuroo in the bathroom, Bokuto recalls the events of that day. 

Another whole day with Akaashi. What a blessing. He laughs upon the memory of lunch, and then abruptly stops when he remembers that Akaashi- 

Akaashi had been so close to him, dabbing at the tears on his face, his hand rubbing circles into his back in an attempt to soothe the burning feeling in his chest. 

He’d never thank Kuroo aloud, but _thank Kuroo,_ because sure, maybe his life had flashed before his eyes, but had it not been for him, Akaashi wouldn’t have done what he did.

Also, Akaashi smelled really good. 

Like, _really_ good. He smelt like… cinnamon buns. 

Bokuto is too busy grinning to himself and staring at the ceiling that he doesn’t notice Kuroo emerge from the bathroom, twisting the towel in his hand and hitting Bokuto with it, who springs up. 

“Ow!” 

“You’re so gross, looking all lovey-dovey and shit.” 

“Fuck you man, I never picked on you when you were pining for Kenma.” 

Kuroo gives him an unimpressed look. 

Bokuto shrugs, grabbing fresh clothes from his drawer. “Whatever bro, all I’m saying is that you aren’t that much better than me.” 

“Get in the damn shower, Bo.” 

Bokuto snickers, closing the door behind him. 

Kuroo calls out to him. “Hey, I’m heading over to Kenma’s and Akaashi’s, so just follow when you’re done okay?” 

“Yeah!” Bokuto calls back, the sound muffled through the door. 

“Don’t do any weird shit in there, okay?” 

“No promises!” 

Kuroo chuckles, shoving his phone into his pocket and exiting the small room. He punches in the code to enter his boyfriend’s dorm. 

“Hey-“ 

Kuroo is cut off by a loud thump, and he feels his heart drop into his stomach. Oh _no._ “Fuck.”

Akaashi has rolled off of his bed and onto the floor, with his duvet thankfully cushioning him. Kuroo disentangles the heavy cloth from the raven to reveal his  
thrashing form. He guides Akaashi away from any edges he could potentially hit his head on.

Kuroo looks over at Kenma who watches with his eyes wide, his phone clutched tightly into his hand. He makes eye-contact with him. 

“Should I-“ 

“No, he should be fine. Give him five minutes.” Kuroo reassures, a shaky smile on his face. He pulls out his phone to call Oikawa, praying that he’d pick up. It’d be nice to be with someone who had dealt with Akaashi first hand. 

“Miss me alrea-“ Oikawa chirps from the other line. 

“Akaashi. Dorm.” Is all that Kuroo says, before he hangs up the phone. A few seconds later, he hears the frantic push of buttons and the door is ripped open,  
revealing a very alarmed Oikawa. He strides into the room, his eyes scanning over Akaashi’s for any wounds. 

“Thank fuck the floor is carpeted.” He sighs, collapsing onto his knees. 

“Sorry, can someone explain to me, what _exactly_ is going on?” 

Oikawa gives Kenma a tired smile.”Akaashi is epileptic, as you can see. He’s just having a seizure. Nothing to worry about.” He relays, as calmly as possible. 

“You’re probably pretty shell-shocked, but no need to worry, Ken-chan! Oikawa Tooru is here.” 

“God help us all.” Kuroo groans. 

“Hey! You aren’t helping!” 

Kenma relaxes slightly, relieved that there was someone here who had dealt with the situation at hand before. He tucks his knees under his chin. 

Seconds ticked by, and it felt like an eternity before Akaashi finally halted in his movements. His arms splayed out in front of him. 

The crease in between Kuroo’s eyebrows disappears, and Oikawa leans back onto the side of Kenma’s bed. The blond watches intently, watching as Akaashi’s  
chest rose and fell slightly. 

“What would have happened if I didn’t get here?” Kuroo mumbles. 

Oikawa sighs. “Kuroo.” 

“No, Oikawa. I’m fucking serious.” Kuroo tells him, seriously. This prompts Oikawa to shut his mouth. 

How _ironic_ that he literally just talked to Akaashi earlier that day about this sort of thing happening. 

“He was just being cautious.” Oikawa reproaches quietly.

 _”Are you kidding me?_ How is not telling anyone, especially Kenma for that matter- who is his fucking _roommate,_ cautious? That’s so irresponsible of him! And you! I’d thought that you knew better.” Kuroo furiously whispers. 

Oikawa winces. He never quite liked being yelled at. 

“I was just… It wasn’t my place to tell you guys.” 

“You think that’s what I’m mad at you for? Of course I didn’t expect you to go around with a sign attached to your face that says ‘Akaashi is an epileptic’! I mean, why didn’t you convince him and tell us?” 

“You think I didn’t try? Obviously I would have!” Oikawa frowns, beginning to get angry. 

“Well you didn’t try _hard_ enough!” Kuroo bites. 

“That’s enough.” Kenma intervenes, his hair blanketing his face. “You’re both being stupid. In the end it was Akaashi’s decision whether or not he was going to  
tell us. I’m sure he has a valid reason, Kuro. No matter how stupid it is. Oikawa was just trying to be a good friend by doing what he thought was right. Albeit, it probably wasn’t the best way to go about things, but there’s nothing we can do. At least we’re all somewhat aware.” 

“’cept Bo.” Kuroo reminds. 

“I’ll tell him,” Akaashi slurs. 

“You’ll what?” 

“I’ll tell Bokuto-san.” Akaashi repeats himself, louder this time. 

The familiar beeps of the keypad are heard, and before Bokuto can swing the door open, Akaashi rushes, saying _”Soon.”_

Bokuto stands in the threshold, a grin on his lips. Which immediately slips off upon seeing Akaashi on the floor. 

_”Akaashi!_ are you okay?” he rushes over immediately, almost tripping over Oikawa. The dorm in that moment was certainly crowded. 

“Yeah, I just… fell off my bed.” Which wasn’t a lie, technically. “I was sleeping. I haven’t taken a shower yet, so I’m sorry to have to make you wait.” 

“It’s okay! Take your time.” Bokuto grins, extending his hand for Akaashi to take so he could stand. 

Oikawa doesn’t look at Akaashi as he walks past, picking at the carpet beneath his fingers. Kuroo gives his look of disapproval. Kenma looks at him expectantly,  
and Akaashi mouths a ‘later.’ Kenma’s eyes linger a second longer before he goes back to whatever it was he was doing. 

He steps into the shower, and he almost hopes that he slips.

\----

Akaashi suddenly doesn’t wanna go out anymore. Or talk to anyone for that matter. The guilt settles itself like a heavy weight on his stomach.

Was he really that bad for not telling Bokuto? Bokuto would understand, right? 

All he wanted to do was sleep. 

Like, forever. 

Until tomorrow never came. 

When he would have to set for Bokuto. 

He turns off the shower, and stands, dripping water. Before registering that he actually has to get out. He still has to talk to Kenma. 

Fuck. 

And today had been going so well. 

He dries himself off with the towel, sliding on his clothes almost mechanically. He takes one last look at himself in the mirror before leaving the bathroom. 

“Hey! You ready to-?” 

“Actually, Bokuto-san, I’m not feeling too well.” 

“Oh. Well, that’s fine! We can just order some food, or something.” 

_Don’t look at him,_ because Akaashi knows that one look at Bokuto would probably make him feel even worse for what he was about to do. “Bokuto-san,  
I kind of just wanna go to sleep.” 

“Oh.” Bokuto says, understanding. And Akaashi _hates_ that tone in his voice. 

“It’s okay Bo, we can go out for dinner together! Right, Oikawa?” Kuroo hints. 

“H-huh? O-oh! Yeah, of course we can! Off we go now, Bo-chan!” Oikawa stumbles onto his feet, Kuroo in the lead, and pushes Bokuto towards the door, who doesn’t take his eyes away from Akaashi, who hasn’t looked at him once since he came out of the shower. 

“W-wait! What about Kenma!” 

“We can bring him food!” Oikawa chirps happily, and they’re out the door in a flash, not giving any more room for Bokuto to protest. 

Then it was only Akaashi and Kenma left in the room, the silence almost deafening. 

He wouldn’t have minded, maybe- earlier that year. Reluctantly, Akaashi admits that he wasn’t the same person as he was. 

Akaashi stands, stiff as a board. Kenma doesn’t say anything. Doesn’t tell him to cough it up. 

“Do you wanna sit down?” Kenma tells him, gently, moving over on his bed. He doesn’t look at Akaashi, which the latter appreciates. It makes everything slightly  
easier. 

Akaashi sits down beside Kenma, leaving a reasonable amount of space between them. 

Kenma pulls out his laptop, typing quickly, and sets it down between the both of them, the screen loading ‘SCREAM.’ Akaashi looks at him, surprised. The blond keeps his golden eyes trained on the screen. “Don’t feel obligated to explain yourself. I know what I need to know.” Kenma says. 

Akaashi takes a moment to absorb what Kenma had just told him, eyes wide in surprise. Before he relaxes, breathing a sincere, _”Thank you.”_

Kenma ducks his head, and from this angle Akaashi can see that the smaller boy’s ears have turned pink. 

Akaashi bites back a grin, and turns toward the screen, making himself more comfortable. When Kenma sets his phone down, Akaashi glances at the screen, allowing himself a short grin upon seeing what it read. 

_‘What to do in case of a seizure,’_

\----

After the movie, Akaashi thanks Kenma and moves into his own bed. He falls asleep fitfully.

His eyes are closed but his brain is very much awake. He hears Bokuto enter the room some time later, along with Kuroo.

“Here’s your food, Kenma.” Followed by the sound of plastic rustling. “Is Akaashi okay?” 

The rustling stops. “Akaashi’s fine, Bo. I think he just got tired.”

“I’m going to hang with Kenma here for a bit, you can go back to the room if you wanna.” 

“Okay, see you later.” Bokuto leaves. 

“Akaashi, are you really asleep? Or do you just not wanna talk.” Kuroo asks.

He doesn’t answer. 

“When are you planning on telling him?” 

“I told you earlier, sometime soon.” He says, eyes still closed.

“How soon is soon?” 

“Kuro. Cut it out.” Kenma warns. Kuroo backs off. 

Akaashi falls asleep, really falls asleep, shortly after, however he wakes up somewhere at 2 in the morning. The room is dark.

Tossing, and turning, he finds that he can’t quite go back to rest. So he lays on his back, staring at his ceiling, and allows himself to be kept awake by his own  
thoughts. 

Truthfully, he didn’t know when he was going to tell Bokuto, or how. None of the others have reacted badly so far, so why would he, right? 

Everyone’s been telling him that Bokuto would understand, and that none of them would be going anywhere, but he doesn’t wanna have to tell them that if  
anyone would be leaving any time soon, it would probably be him. 

That’s what’s bothering him. They’re all probably going to get so impossibly mad at Akaashi for keeping that part a secret, so why doesn’t he just tell them? 

_”Hey, don’t get to attached, I might just die in the near future!”_ And then what? 

He doesn’t wanna tell them because he knows that they’re going to keep their distance and then stop talking to him altogether. 

He was getting tired mentally. Like, really really tired. He’d been having the same thought process for days now, and it doesn’t help that Kuroo poured a bucket of ice water over his head. 

But that was what he wanted, right? For them to all stop talking to him so he could go back to being his old self that was secluded and went about his day  
mindlessly? 

No. That was boring. His life hadn’t been anything purposeful up to now. Hell, he’d never even thought about what he wanted for himself, before.

Akaashi resists the urge to bury his face into his pillow. 

What did it mean, to be happy? The word was so foreign to him. 

 

Water. He needed to drink some water. 

When he reaches for his jug, he clicks his tongue in annoyance, only to find it empty. 

He throws the covers off of his body sluggishly, and leaves the room for the kitchen. He’s surprised to see that the light was on. 

Oikawa is in the kitchen, his laptop in front of him, and a mug in his hand. He blinks in surprise. “Aka-chan? Why are you still up?” 

“Well, I was sleeping, and then I woke up a few minutes ago.” 

“It’s 3:30?” 

Akaashi pauses. He’d been up for an hour and a half? “I woke up at 2.” 

“What kept you up?” 

“Oh I was just… thinking.”

“About what?”  
When Akaashi is done getting his water, he sits next to Oikawa at the table. “Stuff.” 

 

Oikawa makes a noncommittal sound. “Bokuto was really worried, you know.” He pauses, typing. “So was I.” Pause. “And Kuroo.” Pause. “And Kenma.” 

It’s still weird to Akaashi how there are people other than his parents that actually care what happens to him. 

“The way I see it, you’re still keeping your distance from all of us. Which is totally understandable, by the way, but like- I don’t know it’s kinda confusing, because one day you seem okay and I think that we’re moving forward in terms of friendship and then after that you just… back-off? There’s like, this barricade around you, and we take out a portion and come back to it the next day only to find that the whole thing has been rebuilt again.” 

He continues, “It’s especially confusing for Bokuto. Aka-chan, you held his hand at the amusement park the other day! And then you pulled that stunt at dinner earlier where you suddenly just didn’t wanna go. He really wanted to eat with you, you know?” 

Akaashi winces at that last part. 

“And then there’s that part where you’re so apprehensive to toss to him, which is really weird, because everyone wants to toss to Bokuto, and he feels really bad about it-“

“I don’t want to toss to Bokuto-san because I’m afraid I’ll embarrass myself. He’s a player of very high caliber, I’m sure he’s come across setters far more  
impressive than I’ll ever be. It’s not because I think I’m too good for him, that’s completely asinine.”

“Oh?” Oikawa croons. “Noted, Aka-chan. You know, you’d be really good for Bokuto’s ego when we’re playing.” 

“Oikawa-san.” 

“Right, sorry. I guess what I’m trying to say here, is that I wish you’d trust us a bit more. I know that going out with us was probably a huge thing already, but I just… talk more about yourself, yeah? It’s worrying. You seem like the type to keep everything to yourself, and that’s not good, Aka-chan. You’ll need a release eventually. Or, if you don’t trust _us_ per say, maybe someone in particular?” 

Oikawa was right when he said that Akaashi had a tendency to keep everything to himself. And he was also right about needing a release. It was getting more and more difficult to keep himself in check. 

“And another thing. You and Bo-chan are alike in so many aspects, it’s kinda funny.” 

“How so?” Akaashi has a difficult time keeping the astonishment out of his voice.

“Well,” Oikawa lets out a breath, and looks at him, brown eyes piercing. “That’s for you to find out for yourself, isn’t it?”

\----

Kenma wakes him up a few hours later. After that talk with Oikawa, he tells the brunet shortly after that he’ll be going back to sleep.

_”Thank you, Oikawa-san. You’ve given me a lot to think about.”_

_“Hm? I’m glad I could help! I’m always here if you wanna talk Aka-chan.”_

_Before fully leaving the kitchen, Akaashi turns around. “Oh, and Oikawa-san?”_

_“Hm?”_

_“Go to sleep.”_

“Keiji, Kuro just texted me. He said Hajime’s with Tooru already, they should stop by soon.” 

Akaashi takes a deep breath, burrowing himself further underneath his pillow. 

He was tired. He was _so_ tired. 

_“I hope you aren’t planning on backing out last minute, I’ve been looking forward to this for so long!”_

Akaashi groans loudly, the words Bokuto had uttered the other day echoing in his head. 

“Keiji.” 

The raven gives in, throwing his covers off of his body, and swinging his legs over the side of his bed. Once he sits up, immediately, he feels like something’s wrong. 

His body feels like it’s not his own, and everything felt surreal. His stomach growled loudly. 

Since he didn’t end up going out with Bokuto and the others last night, he didn’t get to eat dinner. 

Akaashi’s eyes widen. _He didn’t get to eat dinner._

Which meant he wasn’t able to take his medication last night.

Sloppy. So sloppy. And out of all the days he had to forget it had to be _today._

“Keiji?” 

“Yep, I’m fine. Sorry, I just…” Akaashi trails off. Not today. He had to be okay today. 

“Are you sure you’re okay? Maybe you should re-“ 

“Nope, I’m okay.” 

“Are you sure?” Kenma sounds doubtful. 

Akaashi nods. 

A silence passes over the both of them. “I’ll go and take a shower first, why don’t you try and get some more rest.” 

Akaashi nods, again, moving to lay back down. He closes his eyes, but he doesn’t really fall asleep. This was so bad. 

But Oikawa was right, Akaashi had probably let Bokuto down more than once, and he wasn’t going to add more to that. 

_Not today._

So, he forces himself out of his bed, takes his pill box, and drags himself to the kitchen where he can make breakfast for himself and take meds and _hopefully_ get himself together. 

He just does that and prays to _God_ that his head clears.

As he finishes his glass of water, Bokuto comes strutting into the room, stopping short upon seeing Akaashi.

“Hey!!! Good morning, Akaashi! Are you feeling better?” 

_No. I feel like I’m tripping on psychedelics, which technically, I am, but you don’t need to know that._ “Good morning, Bokuto-san. And yes, I’m feeling better.” 

If there was one thing you should know about Akaashi, is that he’s an impulsive liar. It usually presents itself when he thinks he’ll be a burden to others by telling him how he feels. 

Which is literally 99.9% of the time. 

“Are you sure?” Bokuto says, his eyebrows coming together. 

Akaashi forces a tiny smile on his face. “Yeah. I’ll be able to play later, Bokuto-san.” 

“Really?!” Bokuto says, and his voice goes higher, before he clears his throat and attempts to maintain himself. “S-so, you’re going to toss to me?” 

“It seems so.” _That is, if I don’t collapse._

Bokuto grins, and Akaashi hates his heart for beating so fast. “Great!” 

Akaashi looks away, feeling the tips of his ears start to get pink. “I should go and get ready, I haven’t taken a shower yet so…” 

“You go do that!” Bokuto says, moving out of the doorway so that Akaashi could pass. 

“Oh, and Akaashi?” 

Akaashi turns around, raises an eyebrow expectantly. 

“I’m looking forward to it.” He smiles, but this time it’s more of a mixture between a smirk and a grin, and it looks _really_ attractive on him.  
Akaashi doesn’t know what to feel about that. 

 

After he takes a shower and gets dressed both he and Kenma head for the gym where Kuroo said the rest of them had already went. 

Akaash sets down his gym bag on the bench, greeting everyone with a wave before sitting down on the floor to stretch. 

He takes his time warming up, mostly because he was procrastinating setting to Bokuto, worried that he’ll make a mistake. 

A shadow comes and looms over him suddenly. Akaashi recognizes the spiky hair. 

“Iwaizumi-san.” 

“How’re you feeling?” 

“I’m okay.” 

“Oikawa told me that Kuroo found out, and Kenma. He also said that you weren’t feeling well last night.”

“I’m fine now.” Which okay, wasn’t that big of a lie now, he felt a little bit better after taking his medicine at breakfast, but still. There was a dreadful feeling in  
the pit of his stomach. 

“Okay, if you say so. That being said, I’m looking forward to playing against you today.” 

Wow, that didn’t pressure him at all! “As am I.” 

“Akaashi! You’re here now, let’s practice a few sets before the match starts!” 

Akaashi feels his stomach drop, however he still extends his arm for Bokuto to pull him up. He’s gotten a bit more comfortable with holding Bokuto’s hand, now. 

“How do you like your tosses, Bokuto-san?” 

“Oh! I like them high, and a bit closer to the net.” Akaashi already knows this, but he just asks to reaffirm, remembering all of the videos he had watched yesterday.

Bokuto already has a volleyball at hand, and gives it to Kuroo for him to throw. 

The three of them take their respective positions on one side of the net, Akaashi towards the left and Bokuto farther towards the back for his run-up, where  
Kuroo is nearby to throw the ball. 

Akaashi loosens up his wrists, shaking them, before nodding. 

Off to the side, Oikawa cups his hands around his mouth, yelling, “Go, Aka-chan!” 

Kuroo throws the ball, and Akaashi watches it, moving into place, takes note of where Bokuto is, extends his arms above his head, and jumps. 

Bokuto doesn’t get to hit it, which is expected. It’s their first time matching up, after all. 

The timing was off. “That was my bad, sorry.” 

“It’s okay! Take your time, Akaashi.” 

Akaashi can feel the audience at the side piercing a gaze at his back, particularly Oikawa’s. 

“Your form, Aka-chan! Mind your back.” 

Kenma says something that Oikawa echoes quickly. “Kenma says your shoulders are too tight!” 

Akaashi nods, taking a deep breath. 

Kuroo has retrieved another volley ball. “Ready?” 

Akaashi nods. 

Kuroo throws the ball up in the air, nice and high, giving Akaashi a few short seconds to think. 

High, and near the net. 

_Here._ He thinks, and gets into position, his body arching in the air, the ball landing perfectly on his fingertips before it’s gone again, and soaring into Bokuto’s waiting hand. 

2 things happen in that moment. Bokuto’s palm fits snugly against the ball, before he slams it down, the impact resounding loudly. 

Akaashi is suddenly overcome with a wave of nausea, his vision blurring at the edges, and he thinks, _Oh._ He feels the world beneath his feet disappear. Bokuto turns around, ready to compliment Akaashi, but he feels his blood run cold when he sees him. He was there, standing, and then suddenly- he just-

 _Wasn’t._

There laid, before Bokuto’s eyes, Akaashi’s seizing form.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This took me ages to write and now here you have it! Whew. As always, tell me what you guys thought in the comments! Until next time!!! :-) 
> 
> -Basil


	6. letting loose

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Long time no see. 10,000 words. let's go!
> 
> -Basil

Bokuto’s mind, currently, is just one, big, jumbled _mess._

He doesn’t register his feet as they squeak against the hardwood floor, appearing by Akaashi’s side, where Kuroo has crouched down, a concerned Kenma nearby. Oikawa and Iwaizumi have also made their appearances. 

“Keep your distances,” Iwaizumi reminds, gruffly. His eyebrows pulled together in a harsh line. 

“What the _hell?_ W-we should, call the nurse, or _something! He-?”_ Bokuto sputters, his chest feeling like it’s about to cave in on itself. 

“Is going to be fine, Bo. We just need to wait it out.” 

“Time? What-?” And then he realizes that, _oh._

_He’s _the idiot, in this situation. Knowing nothing. Kuroo, Oikawa, and Iwazumi- they all know what to do. This is probably something they’re familiar with.__

__And Kenma._ _

__Kenma isn’t looking at anyone._ _

__Bokuto licks his lips, looking around anxiously. Anywhere but _Akaashi,_ who still hasn’t stopped moving._ _

__“What _exactly_ , is going on.” Bokuto speaks, slowly. But there’s an edge to his voice. An edge that the group of friends notice, and are acquainted with. __

__But they’re not exactly confident in dealing with Bokuto when he’s like _this._ They were used to his up and down moods and him feeling upset, but never entirely _mad._ It was so rare of Bokuto to be on this level of upset, that it never really stuck around long enough for his friends to completely understand it, if that made any sense. _ _

__Oikawa winces. Kuroo glances at him, knowingly, refraining from telling him, _“I told you so.”_ _ _

__Bokuto was angry._ _

__Contrary to what you’d think, Bokuto’s anger wasn’t explosive. It didn’t demand the attention of everyone directly- with his typically loud voice and explosive gestures._ _

__No, it called your attention in a way that it was _quiet._ The complete opposite of Bokuto’s usual self. It was calm. And it was so unusual, because there were a handful of things that ever made Bokuto truly angry. _ _

__“Akaashi’s having a seizure.”_ _

__And Bokuto goes, “I can _see_ that.” Bokuto replies, his voice brusque. “So, Akaashi’s epileptic?”_ _

__Everyone confirms it with a nod of their heads._ _

__“And I’m the only one who doesn’t, sorry, _didn’t_ know?” _ _

__“Bo-“_ _

__“No. It’s fine. I can handle it.” At this point, Bokuto has shifted to sit on his bottom, his arms wrapped around his knees in front of him. He stares blankly at a random spot on the floor._ _

__He glances at Akaashi’s seizing form and wonders, what if the others hadn’t been here, the only person being there, him. What would he do? He would probably freeze up like a complete idiot and do something wrong and _hurt_ Akaashi. _ _

__The rational part of his brain tells him that if that ever happened, it wouldn’t have been his fault because it’s not like Akaashi told him anything, up until this point. Still, he couldn’t help but blame himself._ _

__The thing is, _why._ Why hadn’t he said anything to Bokuto in particular. It’s his fault because he hadn’t done enough for Akaashi to trust him. _ _

__Then, he realizes, that that’s what has him so angry. That he didn’t _know_ anything. _ _

__God, he’s spent so much time with Akaashi and he realizes that he doesn’t even know him that well._ _

__“Kuro, it’s been 5 minutes.”_ _

__“Shit call an ambu-“_ _

__“Already on it.” Iwaizumi mutters, walking away from the group._ _

__An _ambulance?_ _ _

__Clearly, he was missing out on quite a bit._ _

__

__

\---- 

Bokuto doesn’t mind any of them in the waiting room. He merely sits there, hunched over, his hands clasped together firmly in front of him, a passive expression on his face.

He remembers that time at the amusement park, when Akaashi had said it’d take some time before he got around to trusting them all. 

What was it? Had he done something wrong? Did he say something or act out in a way that could have thrown Akaashi off? He recalls all the times they spent together, racks his mind for anything that could have possibly went wrong. 

Maybe Bokuto was overreacting. But it’s kind of a punch in the gut when he realized that, hell- he barely even knows anything about Akaashi.  
“Bo,” Kuroo tries. 

Bokuto takes a deep breath, but still doesn’t bother looking over. 

“Akaashi-“

Bokuto abruptly turns his head to the side, his eyes glaring. Kuroo flinches, and leans back into his seat, slouching down even lower, if that was even possible. 

Kenma is laying down on the chairs, his head in Kuro’s lap as he fiddles with his phone. 

Iwaizumi and Oikawa are seated next to each other in the chairs opposite them. 

“Akaashi Keiji?” A raspy voice cuts into the air. 

The group of friends straighten up in their seats. Bokuto raises his hand. 

“What might your relationship with the patient be?” The doctor says, coming closer. There’s a smell of cigarettes lingering in the air. His name plate says Ukai. 

“We’re his-“ 

“Bokuto is his boyfriend.” Oikawa cuts, smoothly. 

Bokuto looks over at Oikawa, eyes wide. He was most definitely _not_ Akaashi’s boyfriend. 

Ukai raises an ashy blonde eyebrow. “Oh? Keiji never told me he had a boyfriend. I was starting to think that the boy had no friends.” 

They all let out a small laugh at that. “Unfortunately, I can’t let the rest of you in. Did you know of Keiji’s condition?” 

Bokuto almost snorts. That was not the case at _all._ “No I-“ 

“Bokuto was the one who instructed us on what to do, actually.” Oikawa continues to lie, speaking over Bokuto’s voice. 

Iwaizumi is looking at Bokuto firmly, hoping that he gets the message to play along. 

“I see. I guess I could make an exception. As for the rest of you, you’ll have to wait.” 

The group nods quietly.

Bokuto is stunned in his seat, not registering the situation. 

Ukai turns around, gives him a funny look. “Are you coming, boy?” 

Bokuto sputters, launches himself out of his seat, and straightens his shirt. 

They get to his room, and Bokuto hesitates, as he reaches for the door handle. Then, he decides, _no._ Akaashi always wanted him to be the one to talk, and boy, he had _so much_ to say. 

He lets out a breath, grips the handle, and pushes the door open. 

 

Akaashi hears the door open, however does not make any move to open his eyes. He lies still on his back, his hands clasped over his stomach. 

Funny, he thinks. This is how everyone lies on their deathbed. 

He hears footsteps, and the light behind his eyelids shift. There’s a familiar smell lingering in the air, something like cinnamon buns- and Akaashi has to refrain from opening his eyes in surprise, because it’s not one of his family members. 

He has to wonder how he got in. 

“Just my luck. Of course you’re asleep.” He mutters. 

Akaashi doesn’t see Bokuto’s hand reach out to touch his face just before it drops back to his side. 

“God, you’re so-“ Bokuto takes a deep breath, checks himself before he says something he regrets. He paces. “ _Frustrating._ In every single way possible. You never talk about yourself, and today was the day that I realized that I barely even know anything about you. But I hate it, because I find you so damn intriguing and I wanna stick around, _hoping_ that you’ll open up to me. You’re frustrating because this is the longest I’ve ever taken to get close with somebody, and even if I do feel like we’ve made progress, it’s a mere, few, millimeters.” His voice is so low and monotonous and it sounds so _defeated._

It made Akaashi feel like there was a rock stuck in his throat. 

Bokuto is so, so, incredibly exasperated as he spoke. “Why are you so difficult to get to know? Why do you keep pushing me away?” Bokuto hates how he’s feeling like he’s pouring out his soul with every word he utters, but it was like a dam had broken within him. “I enjoy every single second that I get to see you, and I don’t know if I mean as much to you as you do to me, but god dammit, Akaashi.” He sighs. “Why won’t you let me _care_ for you?” The last part comes out as a whisper, and then it’s quiet. 

Afterwards the sound of a chair being pulled over is heard and then a creak. At this point, Akaashi is fully awake.

Bokuto has resigned himself to sitting down beside the bed, watching the rise and fall of Akaashi’s chest. He glances once more at Akaashi’s hand, and decides, _fuck it,_ they’ve held hands before. 

Akaashi, thoroughly unprepared- is flustered. A few seconds after Bokuto’s hand comes in contact with his hand, his pulse picks up, and of course having been connected to the EKG- 

The steady beep of the machine rises in frequency, indicating that his heart-rate has gotten faster. 

“Akaashi?” Bokuto says into the air, and presses the button above the bed for assistance. 

The door opens once more, and Akaashi struggles to calm his heart. 

“You paged?” 

“Yeah um, I’m sorry to be a bother but his heart-rate just picked up randomly?” 

Akaashi wanted to _die._

“Hm.” The nurse, Takeda, walks over to inspect Akaashi. 

-Said patient feels the cold metal of the stethoscope pressed against his chest. 

“His face is also turning really red, is that normal?” 

Takeda furrows his eyebrows in confusion, reaching for the consultation chart, and thus- spotting Bokuto’s hand. 

Then, everything makes sense. He struggles to hold back a smile. How cute. 

“Um, why are you smilng, Takeda-san?” 

The nurse shakes his head. “Nothing, dear.” He scans the file carefully, checking for any irregularities, everything looking normal for the most part. “Is Akaashi-kun here your boyfriend?” 

“I wish.” 

Akaashi curses his heart for not cooperating with him, because the machine ends up beeping even _faster_ after he had managed to calm it down slightly. Bokuto stares at his friend in confusion.

Takeda saves the patient from any more embarrassment, and sets down the clipboard. “Everything seems to be normal…” 

“If anything’s making his heart rate pick up, it’s cause is nothing… internal.” Takeda says, nonchalantly, hoping that Bokuto gets the hint. 

Bokuto’s eyes widen a fraction, “Um-?” 

Another person joins them in the room. A regal looking woman, with a lithe frame. Her face was small, features dainty. Her inky-black, long hair was carefully  
pinned off to the side, her ears sporting diamonds so brilliant in their reflection that it was _blinding._

Kimiko Akaashi, at the age of 43, was still absolutely stunning. 

Her heels clicked against the floor to stand by her son, looking dazed, -but also not-all-that surprised,-making her look older than she really was. 

Bokuto steps away from the bed carefully, his head bowed in respect.

“How is he, Takeda?” 

“He’s stable, for the most part.” He casts another glance at Bokuto. “His head might hurt once he’s awake, but nothing a couple pain-killers won’t fix.”  
Kimiko nods, faintly, her hand carding through her son’s curls. She sniffles slightly, and then takes notice of Bokuto behind her. 

“And you are?” 

“Bokuto Koutarou, ma’am. We met over a phone call briefly.” 

“Ah, yes, of course. You were there?” 

“Yes, ma’am.” 

“I’m surprised he told you. He’s always been-“ 

“Mom.” Keiji decides to cut her off, wincing internally at how rude that was. “Bokuto-san, would you excuse us shortly.” He continues, not looking his way. He wasn’t sure he could at the moment, he needed some time to collect himself in order to prevent fucking up their entire friendship. 

That is, if he hadn’t already. 

Bokuto gives his friend one lasting look, before turning away and walking towards the door. He opens it just as Keiji’s brother, whom Bokuto recognizes as Yoichi, reaches for the doorknob. 

Yoichi stares at him for a moment before it clicks, he gasps, and his hands clap over his mouth. Bokuto gives him a weak smile. “Hey, Yoi-kun.” 

“B-B-B-Bokuto-san! What are you doing here?” 

“Visiting your brother. I was just leaving.” 

“O-okay, sorry,” Yoichi side-steps so Bokuto could pass, who gives him one more smile before walking away and disappearing around a corner. 

Yoichi is star-struck and stunned before he comes back to his senses and walks into the room. 

“Bokuto-san just now looked like a kicked-puppy, what happened?” 

Keiji closes his eyes, dropping his head against the pillow, groaning. “It’s uh, kind of a long story.” _Not really._

“But basically I had told everyone else about my epilepsy…technically… and I uh, kind of put him off, until yesterday, I was… warming up… for a match,” His  
mom tsks, shaking her head and crossing her arms over her chest. “Long-story short, I fell unconscious, which brings us here.” 

“Oh dear, what were you thinking?” 

Keiji was about to tell his mother that had it not been for Bokuto, he probably wouldn’t have played, but he refrains, because he didn’t want to make him look bad. And, well, if he really didn’t want to, he should have said no. 

But that was the thing, he _could_ have said no, but he just chose not to. So it was partly his fault that he was bed-ridden at the moment.  
It was a shame really, that his body had to betray him like that, because deep down, he really was looking forward to play. 

“Wait-wait-wait, Onii-san, what do you mean you told everyone about your epilepsy… _technically._ ” 

Keiji mumbles. 

“What?” 

“I told them a different type of epilepsy. Something non-life-threatening. I don’t know how I’m supposed to break that down to them either.” 

"You just dug your own grave." Then, after realizing what he said, "Wait."

“Tell me something I don’t know, Yoichi.” 

“Dear,” His mother sighs, sitting down on the bed, her hand coming to rest on his shin. “Secrets have a cost.” She pauses. “They’re not meant for free. It’s going to sting a lot more once they find out later on.” 

“They haven’t been treating me differently for the most part, but what if they do? After I tell them the truth, what if they start acting differently,” 

“But by not telling them you aren’t letting them prepare for what’s to come. You’re just planning to leave them hanging like that?” 

“Well, once you put it that way…” 

“You have such little faith in people. And that’s been your fear for so long, but people change. Not everyone is different. It’s time that you stop being so afraid to  
live your life.”

“That was what I was doing.” 

“Pardon?” 

“That was me, trying to live my life. I was just trying to enjoy an innocent game of volleyball, and this had to happen. I’m trying not to be so afraid, but as it is  
now… my happiness seems to come with a cost.” _My health._

Kimiko takes a shaky, deep-breath in. “I can’t fight the inevitable. There is no… miracle. This is it. This is your reality. You’re going to leave us, earlier than most do, and I can’t do anything about it.” Her chin crinkles up, the truth settling into her bones. It hurt to admit, but at the same time, there was a sense of peace that seemed to wash over her. “There’s one thing I can do, and that’s to support you. Let you be happy. I don’t support the fact that you’re demolishing your body… but I just want you to be happy.” She lets out a breath, and the tears begin to fall, a sob leaving her mouth. 

“Mom, come here.” Keiji whispers, tears leaving his eyes as well. 

Kimiko wraps her arms around her son, gasping for breath as she cries. “Oh, my boy,” 

Yoichi has his head bowed, his hand clenched so tight that his knuckles had turned white. Keiji motioned for him as well, and he moved to rest his head on his brother’s shoulder. 

 

After the three of them had managed to calm down, Kimiko moves away from her son, wiping away his tears, followed by Yoichi, and lastly her own. She lets out a small laugh. “I love you boys, you know that yes?”

“Of course we do, mom.” 

"I'm sorry, but I just can't believe mom based her advice off of a Spiderman quote." 

Keiji laughs.

“Oh, laugh it up. Now, tell me about this ‘Bokuto-san,’” 

As the name was mentioned again, Keiji once again feels all the worry crash on him like a wave. Not to mention, the way he had excused himself earlier was completely cold. 

“Just before you came in he kind of... gave me a spiel? And I pretended to be asleep because obviously I didn’t know what to say, and mom… oh my god he’s so painfully earnest. He’s so… he has a heart of gold. And I feel… absolutely _awful_ for not telling him right away. I let my cowardice get in the way…And-“  
Bokuto just always made Keiji feel so overwhelmed… in a good way. There wasn’t enough he could say about the older boy. 

“I think… that’s part of the reason why I keep pushing him away. Because I know he deserves better. God, mom what have I done? I’ve lured them in to something _painful._ I don’t want to hurt any of them. But I want this, you know? I want to be normal. I want to have something I can actually think about on my deathbed and be like, “wow, my life was fun, I’m happy I got the chance to live it, no matter how short.” “I’m going to be a source of pain for them after I die, mom. And I don’t _want_ that.” Keiji finishes, feeling heavy. 

“But pain is temporary, as cheesy as that sounds. They’ll be alright. Sure, for some period of time, they won’t be okay, but it gets better.” 

“May I ask you something?” Yoichi asks for permission, timidly. 

Keiji shrugs, feeling at a loss. 

“Why do you only think about the bad stuff?” 

Keiji raises his gaze from where he was fiddling with his hands. “What do you mean?” 

“I mean, why do you think that the only thing that you’re going to leave them with is something dark and awful? As friends, you’re all going to make memories  
together. Happy ones. You won’t be the only one with something to look back at and be thankful for.” 

Wow, okay. Keiji never thought of it that way. 

“They’d be glad they met you and became your friend at all, Onii-san. That’s all I’m trying to say.” He gives an encouraging smile. “Which is why, you shouldn’t be so afraid of letting Bokuto-san in. Or any of them, for that matter. They won’t regret it, if that’s what you’re worried about.”  
That last bit stood out the most to Keiji. _They won’t regret it._

\---

“How is he?” Is the first thing Oikawa says when Bokuto gets back into the waiting room.

“He’s good, as far as I can tell. He was sleeping…sorta.” 

“Huh?” 

“I think I just embarrassed myself.” 

“When do you not?” Kuroo comments jokingly, in an attempt to lighten up the mood. 

It doesn’t work. 

“Not the time.” Kenma remarks. 

“Yeah, I just got that.” Kuroo laughs awkwardly. 

“Elaborate.” Oikawa says. 

“Well, I thought he was asleep, right? So I went off and all this shit just came pouring out of my mouth, I don’t even wanna _remember_ what I said, but it was something along the lines of me being pathetic, and-“ 

“How’d you know he was awake?” 

“I didn’t!” 

“What.” 

Bokuto wants the ground to swallow him up whole. “Let me continue.” He pauses, “Basically, I was still thinking along the lines of ‘he’s asleep,’ so like… I held… his… hand.” His voice got softer and softer towards the last part. 

Oikawa let’s out a laugh, then quickly covers his mouth after. 

“Don’t laugh at me!” 

“I’m sorry! But you act like holding his hand is an atrocity and you deserve to be prosecuted. It’s too cute.” 

“Don’t call me cute!” 

“Okay anyway, and then what happened?” 

“So like, the thing- the monitor or whatever-“ 

“ECG.” Iwaizumi provides. 

“Yeah, that. _Anyway!_ So the ECG started beeping like crazy and my first thought was _What in the actual fuck,_ So I pressed the button by his bedside for assistance so this nurse comes it, does his check-up or whatever, and he’s like, “There’s nothing wrong with him, lol” and I was like “Huh,” and then he goes, ““If anything’s making his heart rate pick up, it’s cause is nothing… internal.”” Bokuto makes sure to say it just as Takeda-san did.  
Oikawa shares a look with Kuroo, and together they start laughing. Iwaizumi and Kenma manage to join in as well. 

“That’s” wheeze. “so,” wheeze. “funny!” 

“His heart-rate literally picked up just cos you held his hand oh my god,” 

“Shut up.” Bokuto pouts, slouching into the chair. “Don’t act like that doesn’t happen to you guys, fuck you all.” 

“When will you guys date? It’s so blatantly obvious that you both like each other.” 

“Shut the fuck up, you don’t get to police me on being slow on the uptake with Akaashi when you and Iwaizumi _literally_ didn’t start dating until last year.” 

Oikawa gasps. “How rude!” 

“Why don’t you try asking him out?” Iwaizumi offers. 

“You and I both know it’s not that easy.” 

“Yeah, but unlike me or Kuroo, you and Akaashi haven’t known each other all your life. That’s what made asking Oikawa out so difficult, because I had known  
him for so long. Just asking him out randomly and not knowing what would happen afterwards in terms of where our friendship would stand was completely  
daunting.” 

“Oh my god could you just stop psyching yourself out and just ask him? I’m tired. The sexual tension between you two is _suffocating._ ” Kenma pipes, and actually takes the time to look up from his phone, looking utterly unimpressed. 

Everyone blinks at Kenma, taken aback. 

“Well, if Kenma’s openly commented on it, enough is enough, probably.” Kuroo shrugs. 

It looks like it was time for Bokuto to try his luck. 

 

Yoichi strolls into the waiting room absentmindedly, in seek of the vending machine. He slides the bill into the metal box, not paying any mind to the group of rowdy friends behind him.

“Hey, is it just me, but does that kid by the vending machine look _scarily_ like Akaashi?” Iwaizumi points out. 

Oikawa takes a look out of curiosity. “Huh. He does. I think that’s Aka-chan’s brother.” 

“Hey, Yoichi.” Bokuto greets him, and all 4 pairs of eyes turn to look at him. 

Yoichi yelps in surprise, dropping the bottles of milk-tea on the floor, his shoulders coming up to his ears. 

“B-Bokuto-san!” Yoichi whips around, and finally takes notice of the group of athletes behind him. 

“What the _fuck._ ” Kuroo mutters beside him. 

Bokuto totally agrees, the similarities between Yoichi and Akaashi were _frightening._ They had the same hair and build, the only visible difference was  
probably their eye color. 

“Onii-san is okay, you guys are free to visit him, I’m sure you’re all getting antsy.” Yoichi says, struggling to maintain his composure in the presence of the people he admires the most. 

They all continue to look at him, Yoichi growing visibly uncomfortable as the seconds pass by. “I’m sorry, is there something on my face?” 

The five of them all start talking at once. 

“Nope.” 

“Nah.”

“Not at all!” 

“No.” 

“Sorry, but the similarities between you and Keiji are shell-shocking.” Kuroo pipes. 

“Did you seriously just use the term ‘shell-shocking’ in a sentence? How lame.” Bokuto replies. 

“At least I don’t have the vocabulary of a five year old.”

They start to bicker, and Yoichi just feels kinda awkward with the eyes on him. “Uh, if you’ll excuse me- I’ll be heading back. You’re all welcome to follow.” Yoichi smiles, and then leaves. 

“Even the way he says “Bokuto-san” is like… in the same tone… what the heck,” Kuroo continues, looking baffled. 

“I wonder if that’s what Keiji would look like if he actually smiled.” Kenma thoughtlessly says so. 

Bokuto freezes, and stares at a spot on the wall blankly.

Iwaizumi waves a hand in front of him, and he doesn’t even blink. “Kenma, I think you broke him.”

The image of Yoichi genuinely smiling makes Bokuto’s insides turn into mush, especially with the very high probability of Akaashi looking like _that._

Bokuto hopes that a day will come that he’d be able to see Akaashi smile freely. 

And not the kind of smile that only tugged at the corners of his lips, but a genuine smile. Teeth and all. .

Bokuto would probably… man, what would Bokuto even _do?_

He feels a sharp pain in his upper arm, snapping him out of his daydream. “Ow- ow- ow! Stop pinching me!” 

Kuroo finally lets go of his arm, not a shred of remorse on his face. “Let’s go visit your _crush,_ now.” 

“Shut up.” 

“Stop teasing him. What are you, five?” Iwaizumi bites. 

“Maybe.” Kuroo quickly retorts. 

They practically have to drag Bokuto along with them back to Akaashi’s room. He trails behind them, not really looking forward to it. 

Oikawa busts open the door just as Yoichi finishes saying “They’re different from what I expected… they all seem rather interesting.” 

Akaashi looks over. “To say the least.” 

Bokuto lingers by the doorway and watches as Oikawa wails on about how worried they all were. “When are you going to talk to your son again, Ken’ichi? He’s running out of time, and you’re being _childish.”_ The familiar voice is enough for him to glance over to see Kimiko for the second time that day. He continues listening. 

“I will. Soon.” 

“When is soon? You’ve never even bothered to call him while he’s been away! You haven’t even thought of visiting him since he arrived!” 

The husband stays quiet, and Kimiko takes it as a cue to continue. “You think you’re the only one having a hard time? Think again. Could you even imagine what it must feel like for Keiji? He needs our utmost support now more than ever. Get yourself together.” 

“Bokuto’s been beating himself up over it,” Kenma quietly utters to Akaashi, which makes the latter feel even worse. 

They needed to talk. 

“You think this is a walk in the park for me? You’re not the only one that’s slowly losing their-“

“Bo-chan! We’re going to head out for some food, and we’re taking Yoi-chan with us! You stay here with Akaashi and keep him company, we’ll just bring you both some take-out.” 

“But-“

He barely gets a say in anything before they’re brushing past him at the doorway, Oikawa having linked arms with Yoichi already. “See you later!” He pushes Bokuto past the door and proceeds to slam it shut. 

“Bokuto-san?” Akaashi calls out, and Bokuto has to refrain from wincing. He wasn’t really looking forward to this.

“Uh, listen, about earlier,-“ 

“May I talk? It seems that I always make you do all the talking.” Akaashi cuts him off, staring at him blankly. Or at least, it _looked_ like he was staring at him, but really he was just trying to focus on his nose. He couldn’t exactly look him in the eye at the moment. 

“Just to make things clear, I heard every last bit of your spiel earlier, and you’re right.” He clears his throat. “I have been… really unfair to you, up until this point. You’ve been putting a lot of effort in our friendship and honestly, I can’t say I’ve been doing the same. I’ve never properly talked about myself in any kind of situation. I’m not going to try and use my illness as an excuse, but it’s played a big role in my life and it has a tendency to dictate my decisions.” 

“Including my decision on choosing how to act upon you.” 

“Akaashi you don’t have to continue-“ 

The younger raises a hand. “I’m not done, don’t interrupt me, Bokuto-san.” He shifts on the bed. “To be honest, the first time I met you, I had no idea how I was supposed to act around you. But you… just made it so easy. You didn’t mind that I was an imbecile when it came to social cues, you completely ignored the fact that I wasn’t the most pleasant to be around, and before I knew it, I considered you a friend. I have to tell you, I went to college with zero expectations. I literally just came here to study, and I had no intention of making any friends. Anyway, I guess what I’m just trying to say is,” He lets out a breath, almost like a sigh of relief.

“Thank you. For being so patient with me. For continuing to try even though I did my best to push you away. I’m beyond grateful to have met you, and Oikawa-san, Iwaizumi-san, Kuroo-san, and Kenma. You’re all changing the reality I live in, in ways that you don’t even know. I’m- really going to try and open up to you all more… for real, this time.” 

Bokuto keeps his mouth shut, eyes wide. 

“You can talk now.” Akaashi clarifies. His ears felt like they were going to melt off the sides of his head at any moment. 

“Can I just ask you something?”

Akaashi nods. 

“How come?” 

“…How come what?” 

“How come you put so much effort in pushing everyone away? No offence, but you were really mean.” 

“…Let’s just say I didn’t like the idea of burdening myself with other people’s business, and vice-versa.” 

“That… sounds really sad.” 

Akaashi shrugs. “I guess so. But friends aren’t all that bad, I guess.” 

Bokuto looks at him, still in mild-shock over what just happened. 

“Also, let’s get something straight, Bokuto-san. What happened earlier was _not_ in any way, shape, or form, your fault. It was mine. I should have been  
more responsible and I should have taken care of myself better.”

“Why did you have to push yourself to that extent anyway? You could have easily said you weren’t feeling well.” Bokuto tells him. 

Akaashi places his hands over his face. “Don’t ask stupid questions, Bokuto-san.” 

Bokuto looks at him, looking like he didn’t have a clue. He tilts his head sideways, eyebrows furrowed. 

The younger groans. “Do I really have to explain this to you, Bokuto-san?” 

“Hit me.” 

At the moment, Akaashi really did feel like hitting him. 

“Are you actually making me guess? I’m not like Oikawa, ‘Kaashi. I don’t know what’s on your mind unless you actually tell me.” 

Akaashi looks at him. “No, no. I’ll tell you everything else except for this one thing, you have to figure it out for yourself.” 

Bokuto is tempted to say, _Oh, like I did with your Epilepsy?_ but doesn’t, because he wasn’t an asshole. “Okay, so do you mind telling me why I was the  
last to find out about this?” He raises an eyebrow, unimpressed. 

While it may have been slightly rude, Akaashi completely understands why he was mad. 

So, he explains himself, telling Bokuto that it’s not like he wanted everyone else to know, hence, he never told any of the others willingly. 

“But how come you didn’t tell me as soon as the others knew about it? I understand having the need to tell one person, maybe even two, but a whole group? If I’m speaking honestly here, ‘Kaashi, I kinda feel like shit. Was it something I did?”

“Absolutely not.” He proceeds to tell Bokuto about his uncertainty on how he would react. 

“Did you think I would leave?” Bokuto’s mouth pulls into a deeper frown. _Is that really how little he thinks of me?_

Akaashi immediately realizes how that must sound. “I mean, rationally, I knew you wouldn’t have, and I trust you enough to know that, but _still._ You know? I was afraid that you would anyway.” 

“I’m sorry, I’m not catching onto something here, why did you care so much about what I thought?” 

“Lord help me, you still don’t realize.” Akaashi deadpans, a hand coming up to rest on his forehead. 

Before he could answer, Bokuto’s phone starts ringing. The screen reads Kuroo. He answers it. “Hel-“ 

“HE LIKES YOU! BOKUTO, I SWEAR TO GOD-!” Oikawa screeches. Bokuto has to pull his phone away from his ear. 

“Tooru, leave them alone.” Kenma tries. 

There’s sounds of struggle from the other side of the phone, before the call is abruptly ended. 

“Who was it?” 

“O-Oikawa. It was Oikawa. He just said some weird stuff,” Bokuto gives out a nervous laugh. 

Akaashi gives him a weird look. “Like what?” 

“It was _really_ weird. Like, really weird, I don’t think you’d like it.” 

“…Okay.” 

Bokuto stays silent for a moment before he gives in. “Oikawa said you like me which is weird because I’m _me_ and you’re _you_ why would you like me? I don’t even know why he would say that aha-!” 

“Bokuto-san-“ 

“He’s so odd,” 

“Bokuto-san,” 

“Aha!” 

“Does this mean you don’t like me back then, Bokuto-san?” 

Bokuto finally shuts-up. _”…What.”_ comes his intelligent response.

Akaashi sighs. 

 

“Wait so… really? You like me?” 

“Yes, Bokuto-san, why is that so hard for you to believe?” Akaashi sips from his bottle of milk tea, his knees pulled up to his chest. 

“Uh... because I’m _annoying_ and loud, and the complete opposite of you?” 

“Don’t do that.” 

“What? What?” Bokuto sits up straighter in his seat.

“You don’t give yourself enough credit.” In fact, if anyone should be in disbelief it should probably be Akaashi. 

Sure, he had never imagined liking someone like Bokuto, or liking _anyone_ for that matter. He has no idea what he sees in him, but as cheesy as it sounded, he was lucky. 

A thought occurs to Akaashi. Squinting, he looks at his bedside table. There was a phone. He picks it up. 

“So this is how Oikawa-san and the others have been eavesdropping.” 

“That’s Iwaizumi’s phone!” 

Sure enough, when he opens the screen, a call is ongoing. He could only assume that it was from Oikawa’s phone. He can’t end the call unless Akaashi can figure out the passcode. 

“Bokuto-san, what’s something distinctly Oikawa-san related?” He presses the phone to his ear to hear what Iwaizumi has to say. 

“What are you doing?” Iwaizumi asks him. 

“Finding out your passcode so I can end the call, Iwaizumi-san.”

“Hi, Oni-san!” 

“Hi, Yoichi. You all better not be corrupting my brother, and by you all I mean you, Oikawa-san and Kuroo-san.” 

“Hey!” They simultaneously protest. 

Akaashi covers the speaker. “Have any ideas on what it could be, Bokuto-san?” 

“No idea,” Bokuto frowns.

Akaashi tries the most obvious possibility, “When’s Oikawa-san’s birthday?” 

“July 20.” 

Akaashi tries it, and surprisingly enough, it reveals a home screen. Which unsurprisingly, is Oikawa. Oikawa seemed to not have a shirt on, shoulders visible; hair mussed, eyes closed and lips parted in the photo.

“Interesting.” Akaashi mutters, a smirk threatening to overcome his face. He puts the phone back to his ear. “Oikawa-san, what was Iwaizumi-san’s last password?” 

“Godzilla!”

Kuroo let out a cackle. 

“Shut the fuck up Kuroo.” Iwaizumi bites. 

“Oikawa-san, I’m surprised you didn’t figure out his passcode already.”

 _“You figured it out?_ How did Aka-chan figure out your passcode?!” 

“Honestly speaking Tooru, it’s not that hard to figure out. I made it simple because I knew you were probably going to try and show-off and over-think it.” 

“What?!” Oikawa exclaims. 

“Anyway, we’ll see you later. Say good bye, Bokuto-san. “ 

“Bye! Bring us food!” 

Akaashi ends the call, and puts it back on the bedside table.

Bokuto is looking at Akaashi with an inexplicable gaze, but if one were to try and describe it, it was a look of fondness and pure adoration. 

“Why are you looking at me like that?” Akaashi asks him, genuinely curious. 

“I’m just really happy.” The older replies, then proceeds with a grin with a brightness unlike any other. 

Akaashi thinks he’s never seen him smile like that before. 

Again, the ECG starts beeping rapidly. 

Bokuto laughs.

\----

After two days, Akaashi is set to leave the hospital. The day before that, Ukai had talked to him personally about his lab results.

_“There’s more activity in your brain than normal, Keiji. What have you been up to? Amongst other things, your ketone levels have been low, which means that you aren’t following your diet.”_

_“I’ve been out of it recently, but I promise to get back to my regular diet, Ukai-san.”_

_“You realize that even a slight mistake in your food intake makes the biggest difference?”_

_“Yes, of course I do. But I missed the taste of some things, you could understand that, Ukai-san.”_

_“I do understand. But at this point, Keiji, know this. The finer details make the biggest difference in your clock. Go about your day carelessly and the time you  
have left is less.” _

_“…Yes sir.”_

Akaashi’s taken the time to think over what his doctor said, and decides that if he was going to die any time soon, he was going to die happy. 

Fuck what his doctor said. 

That was a lie, he was very much concerned about how his choices may affect his lifespan, but life was short, and in his case _extremely_ short, but maybe it was time for him to get out of the monotonous lifestyle. 

Yoichi is sitting in the chair in the corner. “You’re thinking too loud.” He comments. 

Akaashi lets out a breath through his nose.

Suddenly the door bursts open to reveal Bokuto. “Oh good, you’re still here, otherwise I’d have run all the way for nothing.” 

“Bokuto-san,” Akaashi says, surprised. “What are you doing here?” While he’s been confined, Bokuto always found the time to visit him, and they were closer than  
ever. Especially with the 

“I’m here to pick you up? Obviously. Hey Yoichi,” 

“Hey, Bokuto-san.” Yoichi grins. “

“You didn’t have to do that, I could have gotten a ride from my mom, or something. Don’t you have class?” 

“I had morning classes. I tried texting you but you didn’t reply? And I wanted to anyway,” 

“Right. Well, I’m almost done here, so we can go in a bit.” 

“Here, I’ll help you.” Bokuto puts the rest of Akaashi’s belongings in his bag, careful not to put the papers into any disarray. 

“I was gone for two days and I already have a plethora of homework to catch up on.” 

The sound of a shutter goes off and the two boys whip around to look at Yoichi. 

“Who are you sending that to?” Akaashi demands. 

“Uh. Oikawa-san?” 

“I taught you better than that!” Akaashi tsks. 

“Too bad Onii, I sent it already.” 

Akaashi squints at his brother. “Don’t expect me to invite you over at campus any time soon.” 

“It’s one photo!” Yoichi exclaims. 

“We’ll be leaving now, Yoi-chan. I’ll see you soon.” 

Yoichi pouts as Keiji musses up his hair. Bokuto holds up a hand for a high-five, which Yoichi returns enthusiastically. “Be sure to call me every now and then,  
Onii-san.”

He runs into his mother on his way out, looking very frustrated as she was speaking to the man. The man turns around, and Keiji then understand why. “Dad. It’s  
good to see you again.” He says, monotonously. 

“You’re leaving already?” His mother looks at him, concerned. 

“Yes. I have a bunch of school work to catch up on. Thank you for taking care of me,” He bows, respectfully. His mother goes in closer to hug him, and places her  
hand on Bokuto’s shoulder, which startles him a bit. “Look after him, yes?”  
Bokuto smiles reassuringly, and nods his head. 

Keiji gestures for Bokuto to follow him, who bows politely, before scurrying along. 

“Keiji,” The voice makes him halt in his steps. He turns his head to look over his shoulder. “Take care of yourself.” His dad says, a gentle, yet serious look on his face. 

It was so like him. The simplicity of it is what made it so special- given the fact that they’ve barely even spoken in the last year or so. “Thanks, dad.” He gives a small smile, before continuing to walk away. 

 

Akaashi is happy as they leave the hospital, and even more so that he isn’t going home alone. “Thank you for coming all this way, Bokuto-san.” 

“No worries!” 

“I’m actually kind of hungry, would you like to grab some lunch before we get back?” 

“Like- like a, date? Or uh…” 

“It’s… whatever you want it to be,” Akaashi says lightly. 

“A date then.” Bokuto’s tone is laced with finality. 

“Great. How about…curry?” 

“We could go back to that place Kuroo took us to the other day, I saw that that they had curry on the menu.” 

“That’d be perfect, actually. It’s not too far from here is it?” 

“Nah.” 

Along the way they run into a group of dogs and of course, Bokuto has to stop and pet them. 

Akaashi was never really one for dogs, or animals in general, so he just kind of stood there awkwardly and watched as the dogs all swarmed around Bokuto. 

“’Kaashi, come here.” 

“I’m not really into animals Bokuto-san.” 

“Aw, look at them though! Aren’t they so cute?” 

Bokuto turns around to hold a smaller dog up to his face, smiling brightly. He urges Akaashi to pet the Pomeranian, and the younger boy finally relents. 

Akaashi holds out his hand apprehensively, letting the dog smell him or whatever, and after a few seconds his hand is being covered in gross dog slobber. “Hey,  
hey, hey! He likes you!” Bokuto laughs.

He pets the dog’s small head gently, before pulling his hand back and allowing Bokuto to put the poor thing back down. “Wasn’t that cute?” 

“I guess so…” 

“Man, I have to take you to a dog café or something. Unless… you prefer cats?” 

“Any one of them is fine I guess… but you really don’t have to do that.” 

“I want to!” 

“Why do I feel like this is more of something you’ve been wanting to do for a while now but never found the excuse to do so?” 

Bokuto coughs, shrugging. “Well…” 

Akaashi shakes his head, laughing lightly. 

The two of them turn into that same alleyway where the shop is located, and go inside. 

“Oh thank god.” 

“What?” 

“Kuroo-san isn’t here.” 

Bokuto lets out a loud laugh upon Akaashi saying that. 

“Ah, you’re Tetsurou’s friends aren’t’cha? Are you here on a date?” 

Akaashi shares a look with Bokuto, and the former, much to their surprise, ends up being the one to answer. “Sure.” 

“Great! Have a seat.” 

They both get their menus and order their respective meals, then resume conversation. 

“Has anything eventful happened while I was gone?”

“Let’s see… I tore my shorts during yesterday morning’s practice?”

Akaashi almost chokes on the water he was sipping on. _”What?”_

“Yeah! We were doing squats and tore straight through the ass, it was _so_ embarrassing. And I didn’t have an extra pair so I had to use the sketchy ones that some people use for try-outs, I don’t even know when they were last washed.” 

“Anything else of significance?” 

“Um, Kuroo and Kenma knocked over a shelf in the library making-out.”

“Yesterday too?” 

“Yeah. It was wild.”

Akaashi actually has to laugh at that, “How’s Kenma?” 

“He hasn’t talked to Kuroo since.” 

“Understandably.” 

“Also, someone was filming a porno in one of the dorms last night.”

“What?” 

“Well, I don’t know if they were _actually_ filming it, but… our walls are thin, y’know?” 

Akaashi makes a disgusted face, and then his face suddenly blanks.

Bokuto takes notice of it, waving a hand in front of his face. Ah, shit. He sits there patiently, waiting for the seizure to pass. 

A few minutes later, he blinks, as if he was awakened, then proceeds to look apologetic. “I’m sorry.” 

“Don’t be. I completely understand.” Bokuto reassures him. 

“I might be doing that often,” 

“It’s okay. How’re you feeling?” 

“Okay, just a bit dreary.” 

Bokuto nods in understanding. 

Nekomata appears with their food in his hands, and sets it down on the table. “Please, enjoy.” 

“Thank you for the food!” The two chime, then proceed to dig into their meals. 

“This is so good,” Bokuto speaks through a mouthful of food. He picks some onto his spoon for Akaashi to try “Here, try some.” 

Akaashi tastes it, and makes an ‘mm’ sound. “It’s delicious. Mine is as well. You can try some if you’d like?” 

They continue on like that, making idle chatter, and then comes the fight for who’s to pay for the bill. 

“Rock-paper-scissors.” Akaashi suggests. 

“No, I’m paying.” 

“Bokuto-san you’re being very stubborn.”

“I’m not, you are! Just let me pay!” 

“Okay, hold on.” Akaashi snatches up the tray. “How about, we alternate on who pays each time we go out. Now, since you’re always paying anyways, it won’t  
hurt for me to take the bill this time.” 

Bokuto protests, but Akaashi gives him a look, and he sighs. “You’re not going to let me, are you?” 

Akaashi answers by placing the yen onto the little tray and calling Nekomata-san over. He hands it to him before Bokuto could do anything else. 

After that, they both leave the store. They talk casually, roaming the streets, walking into some manga stores and whatnot.

“Do you wanna drop by Fukurodani’s on our way back for something?” Bokuto suggests, kind of hoping to see Akaashi play the piano again. 

“Now that you mention it, I’m kind of craving some ice cream.”

Once they reach the counter, Sarukui visibly perks up upon the sight of the two of them. “Hey! Akaashi was it? It’s nice to see you again.” 

“You too, Sarukui-san.” 

“What, no greeting for me, Saru-man?” 

“Hey, Bokuto.” 

Bokuto pouts at the boring greeting. “Where’s Konoha?” 

“He’s out on a date with Yuki.” 

“Aw that’s too bad.” 

“Anyway, what could I get for you two?” 

“Could I get a half chocolate and vanilla swirl? Medium.” Akaashi tells him.

“Same for me.” 

Saru hums, tapping the screen, and saying their total. 

“Bokuto-san if your hand so much as touches your back pocket I will snap your wrist.” Akaashi says, reaching for his own wallet himself.  
Bokuto frowns. 

The pianist side-eyes the piano, tempted to play it. 

“You can, if you wanna.” Sarukui notices, and takes Akaashi's money.

“Really? I wouldn’t want to disturb anyone in here,” 

“Maybe not something overly intense?” Sarukui tells him. 

Akaashi looks over at Bokuto. “Do you mind?” 

“No, no! Play as much as you’d like to.” 

Akaashi gives a small, grateful smile, and heads for the piano stool. He sits there for a moment, thinking over a few pieces in his head, but none of them felt quite right.

So, he decides on using one of his own. 

He begins, pressing into the black and white keys, the melody soft, and gentle. It kind of felt like he was laying out his insides for everyone to see, but in a way, it  
felt kind of liberating. He had written it a while back, right after his friends were all gone, and he felt more alone than ever. 

Bokuto watches, entranced, and notices that Akaashi looked a little different as he was playing. As he continued to listen, he started feeling sad for some reason. 

It was a piece that sounded a little bit more melancholy than the other ones Akaashi had written, truth be told his normal ones sounded rather sad already, but  
this one was just… different.

By the time he finished, he hadn’t even noticed that he was crying. 

Bokuto steps up to the bench, holding out a tissue. “Your ice-cream’s melting.” He says, albeit awkwardly. 

Akaashi lets out a little laugh, sniffling. “Thank you,” he croaks. 

“Can I sit?” 

“Be my guest.” 

Bokuto lets Akaashi calm down first, before talking. “That was beautiful. I’ve never heard it before, who composed it?” 

“It’s called [ Time Forgets… ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4PJ-dgnK-Ok) I wrote it.” 

“You did? Wow, Akaashi that’s… that’s amazing.” He breathes out, shaking his head. “You’re so talented.” 

“Thank you, Bokuto-san.” And really, it did mean a lot. 

“Though, if I’m being honest… it sounds a bit…” 

“Sad? Trust me, I know.” Akaashi spoons a bit of ice cream into his mouth. “When I wrote it… let’s just say I wasn’t having the time of my life. And… it’s exactly  
how I wrote it. Time Forgets, life goes on, you move past it. I just kind of… I don’t know tried to hear what I felt like through the piano? If that makes any sense at all.” 

“That’s really interesting. I’m glad I got to hear it.” 

Akaashi shrugs, setting the cup down on top of the piano. He scoots a little closer to the keys once more. 

“Would you be interested in learning a thing or two, Bokuto-san?” 

“Seriously?” 

“Why not?”

Bokuto finishes up the last of his ice cream and places his cup next to Akaashi’s. 

“Have you listened to [Blue Moon?”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zhLxL_hSVCE)

“The one that goes like, tun tunun tun tun tunun tun tun tunun tun tunun tun, tun tun tun, tunu nu nunu nun, tun tun tun-” 

Akaashi laughs because of course Bokuto would go out of his way to imitate what it sounded like on the piano. “Yes, that one, Bokuto-san.” 

It’s a sight to see him _actually_ laughing and not in the half-assed way he usually does it. _You did that. You made him laugh. You’re a legend._ Bokuto grins at the thought. 

“Okay so put your fingers here…” 

“Like this?” 

“Yes, that’s correct, and then you press the keys over here…” 

Really, Bokuto’s part wasn’t all that hard, but he’d still misplace his fingers here and there when shifting so that Akaashi would reach over and re-position his  
hands. Slick. 

“Okay, let’s play your part together first before we get into the real piece. Five, six, seven, eight…” Akaashi substitutes the part where he would supposedly play by just saying it aloud and counting the rests in between. After that’s done, they move on. “I’ll play my part so you can kind of get a feel of the timing…” 

“Got it?” Akaashi asks him once he finishes his part. 

“I think so,”

“Let’s do it, then…” 

“One, two three, and-“ It doesn’t go perfectly the first time, Bokuto misses a few beats and his timing is slightly off. 

“I’m so sorry!” Bokuto whines resting his head on top of the piano. 

“It’s okay, let’s do it again…” 

It takes a few more tries and some coaxing before they finally get it down successfully. 

“That wasn’t lucky, right? Right?” 

“We can play it again if you’d like?” 

Bokuto nods enthusiastically, so they do. 

The older man laughs while playing, pleased with himself, and Akaashi smiles, teeth and all. 

“Wow, okay. That felt great.” Bokuto says, looking at Akaashi who’s still smiling, cheeks rosy. Upon seeing this, he blinks, just to make sure his eyes aren’t  
deceiving him. “I think I’m having an out-of-body experience.” 

Akaashi doesn’t hear that, and checks the time on the clock. “Bokuto-san, it’s already 3pm. I think we should head back now.” 

“Okay, okay, but wait- before we leave, why don’t you play one more thing?” 

“I don’t know…” 

“Please?” 

“…Fine. Why do I feel like I’ve spoiled you?” The last part comes out in a mutter, but because Bokuto has super-hearing he still hears it, and giggles. 

“Let’s see… what should I play…” 

“Something difficult!”

Akaashi side-eyes Bokuto, pursing his lips. He was really pushing it. “How about… something that isn’t classical.” Once again, the pianist scoots closer to the stool wriggling his hands, and rolling his wrists around. “Bokuto-san, please excuse me, I might be needing the whole bench for this one.” 

Bokuto stumbles off the bench, opting for a seat nearest him. 

Akaashi sits up straight, and then plays. It’s kinda slow at first.

Bokuto recognizes it immediately. Who wouldn’t? “Is- is he playing [ Unravel?” ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sEQf5lcnj_o)

_“Dude._ That arrangement is hard as fuck. I got as far as the end of the first verse.” Bokuto overhears a couple students behind him say. 

“I doubt he could play through the whole thing, psh.” The other one huffs.

Then comes the real thing, and then he _really_ gets into it. 

His fingers rush back and forth between the keys, emitting every sound of the song. 

There’s a pause for a half-second before his hands come down on the lower scale, and then he breezes through the chorus. Just looking at him makes Bokuto’s hands hurt. 

The look on Akaashi’s face is one of pure concentration, his eyebrows furrowed, a light sheen of sweat covering his forehead.

More and more people come pouring into the store to watch Akaashi play, all of them with a fascinated look on their face. A number of them seem to be from the  
music department from college.

Again comes the chorus, and his hands are pounding against the keys, his legs working on the pedals, and some people even bother to clap for him. 

This is what years of no real extra curriculars brought about for Akaashi. On top of that, he never hung out with his friends, so he spent his days on countless  
hours of practice. 

Finally, the song is nearing its end, the sound mellowing out and slowing down. With one final measure, he ends his performance. 

Everyone gives him a round of applause, including the snotty students behind him. 

Akaashi stands up, bowing, before going over to Bokuto. “How was that for something difficult?” Akaashi grins, and wow, Bokuto’s heart feels like it’s going to fly right out of his chest. 

“That was _amazing!”_ Bokuto screeches. 

Akaashi is still smiling as he gathers his stuff. 

“Thanks for the influx of customers man!” Saru whines, gesturing to the long line of people now waiting to be served. 

“You could have asked us to leave earlier, Sarukui-san.” 

“Who would I be to ruin a date like that? I’m not an ass.” 

Akaashi shakes his head. “See you next time.” 

“Bye Akaashi! Bye Bokuto!” 

“That was great!” Bokuto tells him, pushing the door open to the store. 

“Thank you,”

“Your hands are like… spiders.” 

Akaashi laughs. “My hands are going to be so sore.” 

“I’m so sorry! I told you play something difficult but… I didn’t expect you to _pop off_ like that!” 

“It’s alright, I wanted to anyway.” 

“Do you wanna walk through the park?” 

“Why not?” 

Bokuto shamelessly holds Akaashi’s hand when they cross the street. 

Akaashi scolds himself for the whisper at the back of his mind that says, _’Finally._

“I’m just saying, but you’ve loosened up a lot in the last few days…”

“I know… even I’m surprised with myself. But it does feel quite nice to not be on edge all the time. In truth, I’ve held myself back a lot. My thought process is different, these days… I guess part of that is thanks to you. And the others of course… but mainly…” 

“Really? Is that a good thing?” 

“No. I’m kinda glad.” 

“Good, then.” Bokuto then starts to swing their hands back and forth, and it was kinda cute, actually. 

Near the end of the park closest to the campus, they spot a kid all alone- which isn’t all that out-of-the ordinary in Japan, however he looked close to tears.  
Akaashi is the one to point it out. 

“Do you need any help?” He asks. 

“Um, I don’t know where my Onii-san went…”

“Where’d you last see him?” Bokuto questions.

“I kind of separated from him after I followed a cat here,” His lower lip is beginning to tremble. 

“Was it far from here?” 

“I-I think so…” 

They guide him towards a bench and make him sit down. 

“Should we take him to the police station?” 

“No. If he didn’t stray too far away, then he should still be in the area.”

“How long have you been here?” 

“I’m not su-“

“Michi-chan!” 

Akaashi wonders why the voice is so familiar, and then he turns around. 

“Onii-san!” The kid exclaims, hopping off the bench and scurrying over to hug a kneeling Miya. 

“Don’t run off like that!” Miya scolds the smaller boy, standing up and lifting the boy into his arms.

“This is your brother?” Akaashi asks him. 

“No, he’s my cousin, I had to babysit today.” 

Out of all people, of course Miya just happens to be Miya’s cousin. 

“Oh! It’s you! Where have you been these last few days? Not to mention, you haven’t texted me at all.” Miya pouts. 

Then, his eyes widen upon seeing Bokuto. “Oh my god! You weren’t lying when you said you were friends with _the_ Bokuto Koutarou.” 

“Why would I lie?” 

 

“I don’t know maybe, to make me jealous?” 

“Don’t be ridiculous, Miya.” Akaashi rolls his eyes.

Miya grins, then turns to look at Bokuto. “It’s an honor to meet you! I watch all your games. Your spikes are just… wow. Incredible.” 

“Thanks, man.” Bokuto gives a bright smile. 

“I’m sorry I can’t stay very long, I have to get this little one home. But I do know that you’ll be drowning in school work, so leave me a text if you need help.” Miya clicks his tongue, winking. “Say thank you to Akaashi and Bokuto-san, Michi.”

“Thank you very much!” 

They finally reach the dorms, and Bokuto takes the time to ask him what he’s feeling.

“I’m okay… just not looking forward to the homework I have to catch up on.” 

“I’m sure you can do it! I’m going to leave you to do your thing, I don’t wanna disturb you!” 

“Thank you for your time today, Bokuto-san.”

“Totally! I had loads of fun. I really have to take you on a real date sometime though.” 

“That… you do.” Akaashi smiles, finally, before turning to his door and entering his room. 

Kenma looks up, surprised. “I forgot you were coming back today. How’re you feeling?” 

“I’m feeling pretty good.” 

Kenma stares at him. “You look different. In a good way.” 

Akaashi flops onto his bed. 

“I take it you had fun?” 

“Yeah. He came by in the morning and then we got some lunch. Walked around for a bit, then we went to Fukurodani’s and I taught him how to play Blue Moon.” 

“Wait, so you were with him the whole day?” 

“Pretty much. He came after his morning classes.” 

“…Morning classes.” 

Akaashi pushes himself up onto his elbows. “Why do you sound like that?” 

“Like what?” 

“You sound like you call bullshit.”

Kenma doesn’t reply, just focuses his attention back to his computer screen. 

“What is it?” 

“Nothing, it’s just…” 

Akaashi looks at him expectantly. 

Kenma doesn’t like it when people stare, so he just tells him. “Today’s a Tuesday.” 

Akaashi doesn’t quite catch on. 

“Bokuto has _afternoon_ classes on Tuesday’s.”

“…Oh.” 

 

Kuroo is still in class at this time, and Bokuto was just _way_ too elated at the moment, so he opts for Oikawa’s room instead. He knocks on the door. 

“Who is it?” Oikawa sing-songs. 

“it’s me!!!” 

“Oh my god! Suga-chan can you get the door, I’m kind of stuck at the moment.” Comes the muffled response. 

The door swings open a moment later. “Come in!” Sugawara smiles. 

“How was it?” Oikawa asks him, currently surrounded by countless loose papers, a textbook in his lap and his computer in the corner.

“Oh my god, _dude._ It was amazing. Totally worth missing a day of class.” 

“I’d hope so, Futakuchi looked about ready to die when I saw him a while ago.” Sugawara retorts.

“Shhh, let’s not talk about class.”

“Spill! What happened?” Oikawa prods. 

“So like, I ran after morning practice this morning all the way to the hospital, and then it was already lunch time, yeah? So we grabbed some food before doing anything, and y’know when for a stroll. Then I suggested we go to Fukurodani’s in case he wanted anything, but really, I just wanted to see him play the piano again, don’t @ me.” Bokuto leaves out the part where Akaashi cries, because he doesn’t think the latter wouldn’t appreciate it very much. “He taught me how to play too! Blue Moon. It was great. I told him to play one last thing before he left, something difficult, and he went off on that piano man. He played the opening for Tokyo Ghoul? He brought in so many customers. Then after that we walked through the park and helped a little kid. That’s it.” 

“Aw. That’s so cute.” Oikawa croons. 

“He actually gave a proper smile here and there. And laughed. It was great.” 

“You two are getting pretty close,” Suga comments.

“Oh, I’m only getting started, Suga.” Bokuto grins. He couldn't wait to see Akaashi smile like that again.

He was _definitely_ going to take Akaashi on another date soon.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well. That's that. I hope you guys liked it! School is starting soon again, and this might sound odd but I just might have an easier time updating? Compared to when I was in school, I was writing more often. 
> 
> Also, if you guys happen to be making any fanart, just link it to me in the comments! That way I get to see it, and so do others too! :-) 
> 
> Come leave me a message or something on my [ curious cat ](https://curiouscat.me/ncities) or my [ tumblr. ](https://www.tumblr.com/blog/etherealakaashi)
> 
> See you all soon! 
> 
> -Basil


	7. potstickers

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I honestly don't even remember writing half the shit I wrote since I worked on this chapter sporadically.... it might be a little all over the place. proceed with caution.

It was the Monday after the whole Akaashi ordeal, and Bokuto hasn’t left Akaashi’s side unless absolutely necessary. 

Not that he was complaining. 

“What’s something you hate?” Bokuto asks Akaashi from his spot on the bed. At the moment, the younger boy is busy doing homework on his desk. Bokuto was studying just a few minutes before, but he quickly got bored with it, opting for something far more interesting. 

“Gifts.” Akaashi replies instantly. 

Bokuto is intrigued. “You hate… gifts?” He asks the boy, perplexed. 

Akaashi gives a nod, his back still facing Bokuto as his fingers are busy pressing shortcuts on his keyboard. 

Once again, Akaashi has managed to make Bokuto confused. “How come?”

Akaashi hums, pausing momentarily. “I don’t like the idea of troubling someone with something so trivial.” 

He used to like gifts back when he was younger, but now that he’s a bit older, he just doesn’t see the point in them. Especially if he probably won’t be able to make the most out of them anyway since… you know.

“Wait so… is it gifts in general? Or just when someone gives gifts to you.” 

“I don’t mind giving people gifts… but I haven’t done that in a really long time.” Akaashi then proceeds to fill up the lull in the conversation with the click-clack of his keyboard. 

Bokuto blinks owlishly. “So like… if someone were to give you a gift… what would you do with it?- Asking for a friend.” 

“Forget about giving me a gift, Bokuto-san. It’s absolutely unnecessary.” Akaashi quickly shoots him down. 

Bokuto pouts. “Aw, come on! Who doesn’t like gifts?” 

“I don’t. And I should also mention, I don’t like surprises either.” 

_”Akaashi!”_ Bokuto gasps, his hand coming in contact with his chest, utterly appalled. 

_”Bokuto-san.”_ Akaashi drawls.

Call Akaashi ungrateful, but he’s stopped being able to appreciate gifts, especially extravagant and materialistic ones after being sick… there was no point. It’s not like he would be able to make the most out of them anyway. Instead, he’s opted for only asking for things he _absolutely,_ needs.  
If he were to ask for something, it’d be something inanimate… like a happy memory, or time... 

The latter seems very unrealistic. 

“I guess I don’t mind gifts if it’s something that’s… how should I say… sentimental? I don’t care for extravagant gifts… but I guess I can appreciate a small one here and there.”

“Great! So, what do you want?” 

“…No.” 

“What?!” 

“You don’t have to gift me a gift, Bokuto-san. I mean it.” You being here is a gift in itself. 

Akaashi’s hairs at the back of his neck stand at the thought. Since when did he become so _soft?_

Bokuto pouts. “But I want to!” 

_”Forget it,_ Bokuto-san.” He pushes off of the edge of the desk and spins around, his posture much more relaxed, with a pen twirling between his fingertips. He glances at the clock right above the window. “It’s almost time for dinner, you hungry?” 

Bokuto pushes up and off of his stomach, getting off of the bed. Akaashi throws his pen onto the desk and gets out of his chair. 

Bokuto reaches the door first, and opens it. “After you.” He gestures, and the younger of the two bows his head, hiding his smile as he toes on his slippers. 

They head toward the kitchen, Bokuto trailing behind slightly. Once they reach the kitchen, there’s an unfamiliar boy sitting at the usual round table. His hair is an ashy-brown color, and his frame was small. 

Said boy takes one glance at them walking into the vicinity, and starts packing his things. 

“Woah, hey, we hope you aren’t leaving because we’re here?” Bokuto offers. 

“It’s fine, I was just about to leave anyway.” He picks up his bag, slinging it over his shoulder, and flings one last look in their direction. Particularly, Akaashi’s. He furrows his eyebrows before disappearing through the doorway. 

“D’you know him, ‘Kaashi?” Bokuto snaps back towards his boy- friend? Boyfriend? 

“I don’t think so?...” 

“You don’t know?” Bokuto laughs. 

Akaashi shrugs, his ears turning red. “What are you in the mood for?”

“Ummm your pick.” 

“Let’s see…” The raven opens the fridge, furrowing his eyebrows in concentration. “We have some vegetables... And some beef…” He pulls them out and places it on the  
countertop. “Do we have stuff to make sauce with…” He mutters the last part, more so to himself. 

“You’re like… the only person that actually uses the kitchen. I’m pretty sure 90% of the shit in here… you bought. –And didn’t you say you needed to cut down on the meat?” 

“Yeah but it doesn’t mean you have to? Now, where are the others?” 

“What do you me-?” 

Kuroo walks in, his eyes trained on his phone. “Have we missed foodie hour?” 

Akaashi gives Bokuto a knowing look. “Nope. I don’t think this is enough for all of us. Where’s Kenma?” 

“Here.” Kenma walks out from behind Kuroo, his eyes never leaving his console, as he moves to sit on the stool next to Bokuto. “Hey.” 

“Can someone run out to buy more ingredients? This is nowhere near sufficient, especially if Oikawa-san and Sugawara-san are join-“ 

“What’s up, bitches.” Oikawa announces his arrival, strutting into the room, Sugawara close by. 

It’s sort of become a routine for them, rounding up together every dinner time, and sometimes even breakfast. Akaashi cooks, they all eat, and since they all feel bad- tagging along all the time, Akaashi never has to clean up, and leaves the others to fight over who does the dishes. Even Kenma pitches in at times. 

“They were the last ones here! I say Suga and Oikawa do it.”

“Do what?” Suga asks. 

“Buy the stuff Akaashi needs to cook us a delicious dinner. Please?” Kuroo pouts. 

“Ugh fine! We have no money though.” Oikawa pipes.

“We can all just pitch in? How much can you all give?” Akaashi inquires. 

Everyone digs deep into their pockets, pulling out any spare change and lose bills they have on them. 

The sound of coins hitting the table filled the room. 

“This is literally the most pathetic shit ever. No one has a full bill?” Oikawa laughs, staring at the pile of coins. 

“Well… we’re college students?” Bokuto squeaks. 

Everyone shakes their head, trying not to laugh at the thought of Oikawa and Sugawara paying for the impromptu grocery trip with coins. 

Akaashi fingers through the coins, mentally summing up their budget. “We only have 3000 yen.” 

“Fucking hell, that isn’t even enough for meat!” Kuroo whines. 

“Sorry Bokuto-san, looks like you’re not eating meat tonight.”

“What?! No!” Bokuto whines. 

“If no one else can have it, then you can’t either. We’ll just have to save it for another time.” 

“Wait so… whatever it is you’re cooking… it’s all vegetables?” Oikawa screeches.

The table goes silent. 

Akaashi takes a look at his friends. “Look, when have I ever cooked something for you all that _wasn’t_ good.” 

“You have a point but… all veggies? It sounds like a nightmare…” Sugawara’s eyes are wide. 

“Well shit. It’s that or nothing. Take your pick.” Akaashi deadpans.

“Alright… which one of y’all are willing to pitch in just a little bit more? I just _know_ none of you are okay with this. Come on guys…. Not even for chicken?” 

Akaashi takes one look at his friends, and feels sorry. “Ugh, fine.” He pulls out his wallet and throws a 1000 yen bill on the table. The whole table lights up, and everyone looks at 

Akaashi with stars in their eyes. “Get going. Video call me once you reach the store so I can see what you guys are getting.” 

“If you’re going to make us call you any-“ Oikawa starts, but Sugawara pockets all the change and drags Oikawa away by the ear. “Stop being a bitchass Oikawa, he’s cooking _and_ paying for your food.” Sugawara berates. 

“Owowowow, Suga-chan-!” Oikawa’s whining disappears once they’ve gone far enough. And then there were 4. 

“So, what are you making?” Bokuto chirps, his arms resting on the marble countertop. 

“Banh Mi’s.” 

“A _what?_ ” 

“It’s Vietnamese.”

“I’ve never had one!” 

“Well… I just have to hope you guys will like it.” 

“Oh come on. We always end up eating whatever it is you cook anyway.” 

“I’m going to get started.” 

“Need a hand?”

“That’d be great, thanks.” Bokuto rounds the table and stands next to the younger. “What do you need?” 

“Wash these,” Akaashi picks up the vegetables, and gestures for Bokuto to hold out his hands. “And then, once you’re done, cut them up.” 

“I can do that!” 

Akaashi smiles at Bokuto’s sheer enthusiasm at such a simple task. He also starts pulling out things he might need to be able to cook, and spares a look at Kuroo and Kenma’s direction. 

Kuroo has his arms folded in front of him, his head resting a top of them, and his head twisted in the blonde’s direction. “Kenmaaa,” he drawls, pouting. “Pay attention to meee.” 

Kenma remains indifferent, eyes still trained on his console. “What.” 

Kuroo sits up, grabs the bottom of the chair in between the space of his own legs, and pulls himself closer towards Kenma so he was directly next to him. He then puts his elbow on the table and rests his head in his hand. “You’re adorable.” 

Kenma’s lips twitch, and Kuroo grins at the reaction. 

Akaashi takes that as his queue to look away, opting to turn around and check Bokuto’s progress. 

“I’m done washing them! Where can I put these?” Bokuto exclaims. 

Akaashi pulls out a cutting board. “Right here.” He accompanies it with a knife. 

He moves over to the stove turning it on, before proceeding to place a pan on top of it. While he waits for the pan to heat up, he goes to grab some brown sugar, as well as a spoon for him to scoop it out with. 

Bokuto is struggling a bit with the knife, probably cutting way too slow, and Akaashi upon seeing this, offers his help.

“Here, let me help.” The cook says, gesturing for Bokuto to hand the knife over. “Hold it like this, so that you have a better grip. Tuck the tips of your fingers in like this, so that you don’t end up hurting yourself.” He demonstrates, and the knife moves down swiftly. “You try.” He hands the knife back over to Bokuto. 

Bokuto still struggles a bit. Without thinking too much, Akaashi’s hands circle around the taller’s waist, his eyes just above Bokuto’s shoulder. Akaashi reaches for his hands, readjusting them accordingly, and guides the movement of his arm as he cuts the vegetables. “There you go,” 

Bokuto is hyperaware of how close Akaashi has gotten, and although they’ve been this close once or twice before, maybe even more- it still makes his palms sweaty. He looks over his shoulder, in a haze, and Akaashi looks up at him, their faces inches away from one another. 

Akaashi’s phone starts ringing in the pocket of his sweatpants, and he steps away to answer it. “Hello.” 

“We’re here! What do you need us to get?” Oikawa chirps. Akaashi doesn’t look up as he walks away, back to his space by the stove. “Can you get a baguette?”

“Okay, hold on a sec.” 

Oikawa’s phone is tilted at an unflattering angle, and the words escape Akaashi’s mouth before he can think. “This is the sight Iwaizumi-san is graced with? How underwhelming.” 

Bokuto snorts, shaking his head, as he continues to cut the vegetables. Akaashi’s developed a crude, and bolder sense of humor in the time that he’s known the others. 

“Wha-? Oh fuck you,” He brings the phone up so it’s directly in front of his face, and Sugawara laughs. “That was a good one!” 

“Which one?” Suga asks. 

“Show me.” 

Oikawa flips the camera. 

“Get the one in the front. Right corner.” 

“This one?” 

“No, the other one,” 

“This one?” 

“Yeah, that one’s good.- Actually, get the one right next to it as well.” 

Sugawara diligently obeys, and slips the lengths of bread into his eco-bag. 

“Now, could you get some mint leaves…”

It goes like that for a good thirty minutes, some banter here and there, with Bokuto or Kuroo’s occasional input here and there. 

“Can we get some ice cream?” Oikawa asks. 

“I’m sorry Oikawa-san, I didn’t know we had the luxury? Weren’t you just complaining about not having enough money for meat? Who’s paying for that, by the way?”

Sugawara hisses. “Burn, bitch! I think you’re going to need some aloe-vera on that,” 

“Oh fuck off,” Oikawa retorts, just a kid passes by, who glances at them with wide eyes. “I’m sorry! Don’t swear! Swearing is bad!” Oikawa rushes after the boy, who speed walks around the corner. “We’re just going to pay, then we bounce. I kinda don’t wanna document us emptying our pockets of change, so I’ll see you in a bit.” 

“Please make it quick, Oikawa-san.” 

“Damn, okay, pushy!” Oikawa quickly ends the call, leaving Akaashi no room for say. 

Akaashi frowns, setting his phone aside as he stirs the brown sauce. “I’m not pushy,” 

“Sorry babe, hate to break it to you, but you kind of are.” Bokuto comments, sheepish. Kuroo and Kenma have migrated from the round table to the counter top by the stools. 

Akaashi whips around, eyebrows furrowed. “Am not.”

“Are.” 

“Not.” 

“Are.” 

“Shut up.”

“Hey! That’s Kenma and I’s thing! A kuro-ken thing!” Kuroo frowns. “And woah dude, never thought Akaashi would be one for petnames. _Babe?_ Seriously? Who are you?” 

“I never agreed to us being called ‘kuro-ken’ by the way. Just so you know.” 

“Kenma!” Kuroo pouts.

Akaashi might not have even noticed, had Kuroo not comment on it.

Bokuto sputters, his voice overlapping with Kuroo’s and Kenma’s. “I-it just came out! I’m sorry!” 

Akaashi decides not to humiliate him further. “Don’t mind, Bokuto-san.” 

“Don’t mind as in, you wouldn’t mind him calling you that again, or you do.” 

“I’m not pushy.” Akaashi chooses not to comment on that remark. 

“We’re still on that? Haven’t we established that you are?” 

“What? I’m not pushy.” 

“Kenma, wouldn’t you say that our little Akaashi here, is in fact, pushy?” 

Kuroo’s managed to make Kenma put down his console some time a little while ago, and is now snuggling up to his boyfriend, head on his shoulder. “Uh,” His golden eyes dart around. “You kind of are…” he trails off, voice soft. 

Akaashi’s frown deepens. Bokuto is quick to do something about it. 

“I-It’s not necessarily bad!” Bokuto exclaims. “I wouldn’t say pushy is the right word… you’re just really… _‘firm’?_ Wait no, that sounds bad, uh… What I mean to say is! It’s just with the way you talk, like, you’re very… compelling?”

“I said please…” 

“Yeah but it’s like a polite thing… like… you always say please anyway. But there’s a difference between your “please,” as in, you’re asking someone to do something for you, and your “please” where you’re kind of like… telling them… to do it. Does that make sense?” Bokuto accompanied what he said with animated gestures and varying changes in his voice. 

“I think I kind of get you…”

“It’s nothing for you to get conscious about! There’s just this, like… permanent,” Bokuto pounds his fist into his palm. “like, authority, in your voice. I think it’s cute!” 

“Yeah dude, we didn’t mean to make it sound bad or anything? Sorry if it came off that way, we really didn’t mean to.” Kuroo reassures him. 

“Also, I get the ‘authority’ thing that Bokuto’s talking about. I never really noticed it until he mentioned it, but now that I’m thinking about it, it’s kind of attractive. Don’t worry about it.” Kenma blinks. 

“Did Kenma just… say… that Akaashi’s voice was hot?” Kuroo squints at the air, as you do, when you’re trying to comprehend something. 

Kenma sits up, taking his head off of Kuroo’s shoulder, and uncoiling his arms from his boyfriend’s bicep. “You’re insufferable.” 

“Wait, that isn’t a no?” Bokuto is incredulous. 

“Shut up.” Kenma crosses his arms over his chest, slouching, his blonde hair curtaining his undoubtedly, scarlet-colored face. 

Kuroo cackles, circling his arm around the smaller boy and pulling him into his side. “You’re so cute! And to be honest, I kind of agree. – NEXT!” Kuroo yells, laughing into Kenma’s hair. 

Bokuto grins, then turns to look at Akaashi. “See? No biggie.” 

There’s a warm feeling in the pit of Akaashi’s stomach, reassured. 

In that instant, Oikawa and Sugawara come stumbling into the room, fully equipped with bags of food. 

“Here you go, Akaashi-kun.” Sugawara smiles, finding a space to unload the goods. 

“There’s no need for any formalities, Sugawara-san. Just Akaashi is fine.” 

Sugawara looks at him, the surprise clear on his face, before he relaxes. “Noted.” 

Akaashi finds the receipt loosely tucked in one of the bags, and pulls it out, checking everything. “There should still be change, where’s the 400 yen?” He asks, confused.

Oikawa’s eye twitches a bit, and Sugawara puts a fist over his mouth, as you do when you want to say something but probably shouldn’t. The brunet attempts to save face, digging his hands into his pockets, a baffled look taking place on his features. “I could have sworn I put it in my pocket? Must have rolled out when we were running.” He shares a look with Sugawara, who glances away, choosing to pull out his phone. 

“…your pocket, with absolutely nothing in it… couldn’t hold a couple coins?” Akaashi squints. 

Oikawa’s adam’s apple bobs as he swallows. “No?” 

Akaashi continues to scrutinize him. “Cough it up, Oikawa-san, what else did you buy?” 

“Nothing!” Oikawa pouts, crossing his arms over his chest. 

Akaashi raises an eyebrow at him, then shrugs. “If you’re going to lie about it, at least do a better job.” 

“Hmph.” Oikawa turns his nose up in the air. “If you must know, I bought a chocolate bar.” 

“Courtesy of my money. Was that so hard? You’re welcome by the way.” 

“Man… how much money has Akaashi spent on us since we’ve known him.” Kuroo shakes his head. 

“It’s fine, I don’t really mind, to be honest.” Akaashi raises his shoulders once more. 

Oikawa furrows his eyebrows, because _what?_ There was something off about it. Why did Akaashi give such little regard for his assets? It’s not like he’s trying to be obnoxious… it was kind of like, whatever he could, he’d give without a second thought. Like he, himself, had no use for them. 

“I don’t think I’ve met anyone who blows out on his friends nearly as much as Aka-chan does.” Oikawa comments, baffled. 

-Which ties into the conversation Akaashi had with Bokuto earlier about gifts. He never really minded spending money on his friends, because it was just like Oikawa said.  
It’s not like he had much use for it anyway. Especially with the amount that’s accumulating in his bank account from his parents. 

Honestly. He’s just making the most out of what he has while he’s still alive, and what better way to spend your money than upon knowing that it’ll benefit others. 

If Akaashi tried explaining that to someone else, he has no idea if he’d even make any sense. 

“Bokuto-san, could you finish cutting up the rest of the vegetables- except for the mint, you don’t need to chop that up-, I just need to grill the chicken.”

Akaashi seasons the chicken, and listens to the exchange of voices around him. He’s grown to be quite fond of this standard that they’ve managed to settle into. He finds himself looking forward to the end of the day. He looks forward to _this._ The human interaction he’s been depriving himself of for so long. 

There’s a sizzling sound once the chicken hits the pan, and he hears someone moan. 

“That’s sexy.” It was Sugawara. 

That’s another thing. Akaashi’s learned to laugh and shake his head at the off-handed comments from the people around him. It used to put him off, but now, it’s become a norm for him as well.

Once the chicken finished cooking, Akaashi cuts it up. “Can someone start slicing the bread?” 

Finally, after a long wait, they all take their respective seats at their makeshift dinner-table. 

_”Itadakimasu!”_ They call, before simultaneously biting into their respective sandwiches. 

“Oh _man._ This is _so_ good.” Bokuto shuts his eyes for a moment, savoring the taste. 

“Yo, what the fuck? What kind of sorcery is this? It’s literally, a fucking _sandwich.”_ Kuroo adds.

“ _Wow,_ I came untouched.” 

Akaashi almost chokes at Oikawa’s comment, reaching for a glass to chase the food down. 

“This is like, _orgasmic.”_ Sugawara continues. 

“Alright, I think Akaashi gets it, it’s delicious. Why do you both have to describe everything in a _sexual_ manner?” Kenma says, exasperated. 

“Gordon Ramsey is shaking.” Bokuto mutters, staring at the sandwich, before taking another bite. 

“Alright so, here’s the thing- the bread, is super crunchy, the vegetables are fresh, nice and crispy, and then the chicken is just, - _wow,_ seasoned to perfection.” Kuroo critiques. 

“Yeah, and then there’s like, a tanginess in there. Am I the only one who caught that?” Oikawa adds. 

The table makes collective sounds of agreement.

“It’s lemon.” Akaashi informs them, and the table is filled with sounds of wonder. Akaashi smiles, laughing. 

“And then so, there’s the lemon yeah? But then there’s the brown sauce, and it’s _sweet,_ so there’s a nice contrast of flavor.” Sugawara says, covering his mouth while chewing. 

“The silantro adds a nice bitterness to it, as well.” Kenma pitches in.

“10/10 Yelp review.” – That was Oikawa. 

“This is just really fucking delicious, ‘Kaashi. What would the world be without you?” Bokuto finishes off their discussion.

There’s a shift in Akaashi’s eyes. It was subtle. _“What would the world be without you?”_ The words echo in his mind as he licks the sauce off the corner of his lip. He pushes the thought away, biting into his sandwich once more. 

“I’ll be back in a sec, I just need to go take my medicine. Please, continue eating.” Akaashi pushes his chair away from the table, gives them one last smile, before walking away. 

It feels like there’s a pebble stuck in his throat as he swallows.

It must be the guilt. 

Meanwhile, at the table, the conversation doesn’t stop. 

“Aka-chan’s changed a lot, hasn’t he?” Oikawa says.

“He really has.” Kuroo agrees. 

“I haven’t really talked to the guy much, but he seems pretty solid to me. And I mean, even I can tell- there’s definitely been a change in character.” Sugawara adds. 

“Man, have you seen his smile? _Deadly._ That thing is _deadly.”_ Kuroo snorts. 

“He’s a very pretty guy.” Sugawara frowns. “He’s like, in a whole other _league.”_

“Even I have a pretty hard time believing that he’s real sometimes.” Kenma remarks. 

“Woah, you’ve definitely been exposing yourself quite a lot tonight haven’t you?” Kuroo teases, grinning. “Should I be worried?” 

“Don’t be stupid.” Kenma shoots him a look. 

“’Kaashi’s kind of a tsundere, isn’t he?” Bokuto chuckles. 

“Oh my fucking god, he _is!”_ Oikawa screeches, pointing his finger at Bokuto to accentuate his point. “Seriously! He tries to act all indifferent and shit, but he’s just a big fucking softie. Especially with you.”

“Me-?” 

“I’m back,” Akaashi announces, and everyone jumps in their seats, turning to look at the raven with wide eyes. He plops back down in his chair. 

“What’d I miss?” 

“Nothing.” Everyone replies, and suddenly their sandwiches have become the most interesting thing in the room. 

Bokuto takes an obnoxious bite out of his Banh Mi. _“So good.”_

 

\---- 

 

The next day, Bokuto insists on walking Akaashi to class. 

“Bokuto-san, you really don’t have to,” 

“Oh come on. We’re headed the same way anyway.” 

Well, Bokuto has a point there, they do belong in the same department building. 

“What time do you get out today?” Bokuto asks, and has also taken the liberty of holding the smaller boy’s hand, fingers intertwined, their sides touching. 

“Around 2 PM, if I’m not mistaken.” 

“I get out half-past two, do you wanna do something?” 

“Like what?”

“…I hadn’t actually thought about that part yet.” 

“Don’t you have practice later, though?” 

“Yeah, but it starts at four.” 

“Mind if I swing by?”

“Would I? I would fucking _love_ that. Are you sure you’re okay with that though? Since, well… you know.” 

“What, that whole incident in the gym? Don’t worry about that Bokuto-san, it happens all the time. The gym is no different from any other place I’ve been.”

“Okay well, if you’re feeling sick in any type of way…” 

“I’ll be fine, Bokuto-san.” 

Bokuto grins, canines showing. At this point, they’ve entered the building and reached the staircase. “Great! I’ll see you later?”

“Sure.”

Bokuto takes a quick glance around him, before ducking down and placing a kiss on Akaashi’s cheek. Then, he books it, rounding a corner and disappearing into another hallway. 

Akaashi is stunned for a moment, staring off into the space where Bokuto was just standing in a few moments before, and then a small smile overtakes his features; proceeding to climb up the stairs. 

He’s almost at the end when he hears rushed footsteps behind him, and then a tap on his left shoulder, which prompts him to look in that direction, to find that no one’s there, so he looks the other way; lo-and-behold, there stands Miya Atusmu. “Morning.” He grins. 

“Miya.” 

“Stale. That’s the stalest greeting I’ve ever received in my life.” 

“It’s morning.” 

“Am I right to assume that you skipped classes that one time you went out with Bokuto-san?” 

“I wasn’t skipping, I was excused. I just got discharged that day.” 

“Discharged-? You were in the hospital?” 

“Yeah. It’s why I was absent for a couple days.” 

“Well, did the doctor say anything?” 

Akaashi pauses, looking straight ahead. “…No.” 

Miya looks at him funny. “Well, okay. Anyway, I’m glad you’re okay. Now, would you mind grouping up with me later?” 

“Grouping for what?” though, it sounds more like a statement than a question.

“Sensei said something about researching these infrastructures or whatever. Explaining why the engineers involved with rendering it made the measurements like that, why things were made in that shape, the purpose of this, yada, yada. Y’know. Boring shit? We’re supposed to present it, like, by the end of the week.”

“Huh.” 

“Were you listening at all yesterday?” 

Akaashi seems to have lapses in his memory more often. “Apparently not.” 

Miya laughs. “Oh, and I forgot to mention, we’re supposed to do it in triads, so like…” 

“I don’t care who joins us, as long as they aren’t completely deficient.” 

“Shirabu’s pretty competent.” 

Akaashi’s silent. 

“You don’t know who that is, do you?” 

“…No.” 

Miya throws his head back and laughs. _“Seriously?”_

“Shut up.” 

“You know? Shirabu? Shirabu Kenjirou? ‘Bout this tall, has a perpetual frown on his face? He has the tragic bowl-cut.” 

“…Miya.” 

“You’re unbelievable. It’s chill! He’s nice… kinda. Actually, no, he’s an asshole, but I mean, I’ve known him since high school, I’d like to think we’re somewhat friends at this point.” 

“Huh.” 

“You can handle him, I’m sure.” 

“I didn’t say I couldn’t. I hang out with Kuroo-san almost every day, he’s a renown asshole. No one could possibly beat him at that. It’s like… his craft.” 

“Man, your circle of friends is so cool. Who would have thought you would be friends with them?” 

“I sure as hell didn’t expect it. They’re the type of people I would avoid, to be honest. Somehow though, we all get along pretty well. It never gets boring, that’s for sure.” 

“Guess I have them to thank for your change in character, huh?” 

“That, you do.” 

They enter the classroom. “There he is.” Miya grins, but there’s a hint of mischief lingering around the edges.

“Shirabu!” Miya calls, and in the corner, a boy looks up, waving a hand.

Akaashi realizes, it was the same boy he ran into in the kitchen the other day. 

“This is Akaashi, he’ll be completing our triad.” 

“It’s nice to meet you.” Shirabu says, holding out a slender hand. But there was something careful in his gaze. 

“Likewise.” 

They all sit down, and Akaashi doesn’t miss how Shirabu glances at Miya as he sits down, and forces himself to focus on the sheet of equations in front of him. 

“Did you finish your homework?” Shirabu asks. 

“I did. Except for that one number. I don’t think it has an equation.” Miya answers.

Akaashi isn’t quite sure if he’s supposed to answer or not. 

“Is it the third one?” 

“Yeah. What about you, Akaashi? What’d you get?” 

“Hold on,” Akaashi rifles through his bag, and pulls out his homework. “I got an answer for that one.” 

“What? No way, let me see,” Miya snatches the piece of paper out of his hands. After studying it for a bit, he says, “What the fuck? It actually makes sense.” 

“Help me.” Shirabu says, not a question. 

“Fuck, okay here, - can I use your homework?” Miya asks.

“Sure.” Akaashi says. 

“Okay so here’s the length- where’s your ruler-“ Miya reaches over Shirabu, who looks taken aback. 

Akaashi takes a sip out of his water, listening to Miya as he explains, but Shirabu seems to be focusing on something else. Akaashi pulls his lips into a line. Would it be right to assume-? 

No. He’s only been here 5 minutes. He had no right to assume anything. 

“So you end up with this! Fuck, why hadn’t I thought of that?” Miya shakes his head, flabbergasted. “You some kind of math genius or something?” He directs the last part towards  
the raven. 

“You’re shit at explaining.” Shirabu deadpans. 

Akaashi has to stop himself from chuckling. Miya explained it just fine. Someone’s distracted.

“What the-? Am not! What do you not get?” 

“Everything.” 

“Ugh, fine! I’ll explain everything again, because I’m a good friend.” Miya scoots his chair closer to Shirabu, who seems to be growing more and more flustered by the second. 

Akaashi takes another sip out of his water bottle. 

This was going to be interesting. 

 

By the end of the meeting, they had made decent progress with their presentation, and Akaashi’s pretty much confirmed his suspicions. 

“Aw, are you mad that I’m right and you’re wrong? Poor baby.” Miya laughs, clasping his hands in front of his body and swinging his torso back and forth like a child. 

“Shut the fuck up. You’re insufferable.” Shirabu retorts. 

Akaashi almost wants to comment on it and tell them to stop flirting, but he knows how much he hates it himself when someone tells him and a certain someone to do the same. 

Shirabu then turns to look at Akaashi. “I’m sorry about this. I swear we aren’t this annoying.” 

“It’s fine, I’m used to it.” 

“I feel pretty bad, you did like, half of the work we accomplished today by yourself, while this dipshit over here just stood there and be all obnoxious.” 

“Hey!” 

“Am I wrong?” 

“Well-“ 

“That’s a no. Just sit there and be pretty if you aren’t going to help, will you?” 

“…You think I’m pretty, Shirabu?”

“Oh, fuck-off.” 

Miya cackles, then types something into his computer. “Alright, fine, I’ll stop being a jackass.” 

“Thank you.” Shirabu and Akaashi chorus, looking at each other in surprise. They laugh. 

“Wow. You guys barely even know each other and you’re already ganging up on me.” Miya pouts, accompanied with a glare.

“Stop pouting. Answer this.” Shirabu barely even has to look up to know that Miya’s pouting. He shoves a piece of paper in his face. 

Akaashi’s in the middle of observing the structure given to them when he feels a sharp pain in his chest. He grabs it, frowning. He stares at something far, feeling his eyes spasm. 

“Woah, what the fuck, are you alright Akaashi-kun?” 

“What happened?” Miya switches his attention from his laptop swiftly. 

“I don’t know, his eyes did a _thing.”_

Miya rushes out of his chair, crouches down to look Akaashi in the eye, whose eyes have glazed over, an empty look taking over his face. 

“What the fuck is going on Miya? Is he some kind of Satanist?” Shirabu has a look of distress painted on his face. 

“Akaashi? Akaashi?” 

Akaashi’s vaguely aware of Miya in front of him, calling his name. 

Akaashi would be lying if he hadn’t noticed. He was having seizures more often than not, and sometimes he’d completely blank out, like there would be a gap in his mind, and he couldn’t quite get his words out properly. – It wasn’t quite a seizure, he would just have difficulty in comprehending what was in front of him. He’d also find his arm, or his leg going numb at random. Though, the latter was on rare occasion. 

He was absolutely terrified whenever he would ponder over it. 

Which is why he chooses to push it away for now, he’ll cross that bridge once he gets there. 

All of a sudden, Akaashi’s eyes roll backwards and he almost topples completely out of his chair. Miya just barely gets a grip on his arm to prevent him from a hard collision with the floor. “Woah, woah, woah-“ 

Shirabu scrambles out of his own seat eyes wide as he leans over the table to see where Akaashi now laid, twitching. 

“Miya-kun? What’s going on-?” Their professor makes an appearance next to Shirabu, gasping at the sight.

“He’s fine,” Miya says, attempting to loosen up the collar of his sweater. “You and your damn turtlenecks.” Miya mutters, frowning. He’s well aware that people are starting to stare. 

“Would you all mind your own business?” He barks over his shoulder. 

Their professor clears his throat. “Get back to work everyone, Miya seems to have everything under control.” Still, she steps closer. “I knew he had some medical issues… but I’ve never quite seen if for myself... Are you sure you’re alright, dear?” She says. Miya hates how she stares at Akaashi. 

“For now, yes.”

Miya pushes the nearby stool away to give Akaashi some more room to move. Miya turns around to see that everyone still has their eyes trained on the raven. 

_”What?”_ Miya glares, and Shirabu’s never seen Miya scowl so intensely. Everyone scrambles to go back to their work benches, scratching at their heads. 

Miya furrows his eyebrows. Akaashi’s never seized in public before. At least, not quite like this. He would usually have something to go by to know when one was coming. Why would it be any different? He wondered if he was over-reacting.

Miya looks away once he’s done taking all the necessary precautions, choosing to lean against the table-top, blocking the sight away from any nosy fuck that decides that  
Akaashi’s just _so_ fascinating to see. 

Shirabu finds it difficult to focus now. Just how well did Miya know Akaashi? –It was stupid. He couldn’t be jealous. Especially considering that Akaashi wasn’t even all that bad. He was soft-spoken and well-mannered, witty. _Pretty._ Everything he couldn’t quite be. _“Stop comparing.”_ He mutters. 

Akaashi stops abruptly after a few moments, stilling on the floor. Miya heaves a sigh of relief. “Thank _God.”_

Shirabu glances at Miya. “Is there any way I could help?” 

“Nah, I got it. He’ll come around in a few.” Miya says, eyes trained on Akaashi, looking at him in a way that he never did when he looked at Shirabu.

Shirabu purses his lips. Inhales. Continues to do what he’s been doing from the moment he met Miya. –Ignores the way his heart sings. 

Only this time, it was a song of sorrow.

\---- 

Akaashi was exhausted. Miya stood by the doorway of his dorm, hands in his pockets. “Are you gonna be okay?”

“Yeah, I’ll be fine. I just need to sleep it off.” Akaashi mutters, crawling on his bed. He was feeling a bit faint alongside the oncoming headache. 

“I don’t wanna leave you here, alone.” The blonde sighs. 

“I’ll be fine Kenma should be coming back from classes in a while. Go on and help Shirabu-kun since all you did was slack off today. Send him my apologies.” 

“Are you sure?” Miya frowns. 

“Yes.” 

“I’ll wait here until he comes,” 

“No. Don’t keep Shirabu-kun waiting.” 

“He can wait. He’s used to it anyway.” 

Akaashi weakly smiles to himself at the last part. “Don’t make him wait for too long.” He says, a bit cryptic. His phone starts vibrating in his pocket, and he doesn’t even read the screen before he answers. 

“Hello.” He croaks tiredly. 

“’Kaashi! Where are you? I stopped by your classroom but you weren’t there anymore.” 

Akaashi could almost hear Bokuto pouting through the phone. _Shit._ “Sorry Bokuto-san, I went back to the dorm. I’m a bit drained from class.” 

“Oh… well, are you still stopping by practice?”

That probably wasn’t a very good idea, considering the condition he’s in. This time, he decides not to push his luck. “Not today Bokuto-san. Sorry.”

“Aww.” Bokuto whines, dejected. Which doesn’t help the guilt gnawing at him at all. 

“We can still eat together, though? Just here at the dorm, unfortunately. I’m not certain it would be an optimal decision for me to go out this time.” 

Bokuto immediately cheers up at that. “Sure! I still have a bit of time before practice. I’ll be there in a bit!” He ends the call before Akaashi could say anything. 

“Bokuto-san’s coming?” Miya pipes from the door. 

Akaashi had momentarily forgotten that he was there. “Yeah.” 

“I should probably get going then, huh?” 

The raven nods. “Shirabu-kun is probably fuming.” 

“Nah, he’s not a _complete_ asshole. He’d understand why I took my time.” _One of the reasons being that he knows that I have an ever-growing attraction to you, and the other simply being that you’re sick._ With that thought, the blonde pushes off of the doorway. “I’ll get going.” 

Akaashi gives a meek little wave. “Take care.” 

Miya’s just about to shut the door when Akaashi calls out to him from the bed. 

“Oh, and Miya?” 

Miya cocks his head to the side in question. “Hm?” 

“Don’t take Shirabu-kun for granted.” Akaashi stares at him, green eyes swirling with knowledge, before he shuts them closed. “Have a safe trip.” 

Miya furrows his eyebrows, not quite understanding what the raven was trying to say, before making his exit. 

 

Akaashi dozes off for a while, coming back to his senses once he can hear the sound of a code being punched into the keypad on the door. 

Bokuto makes himself comfortable as he steps inside, sitting down on the foot of Akaashi’s bed where the younger had made room for him. 

“How’re you feeling?” Bokuto asks, worry swirling in his honey-toned eyes. 

“I could be better. What are you hungry for, Bokuto-san?” 

“I’m not that hungry.” 

Akaashi squints. When was Bokuto not hungry? “Is something wrong?” 

“Huh?” 

“You just said you weren’t hungry.” 

“Yeah?” Bokuto looks at him in confusion. 

“You’re always hungry.” 

The older of the two, grins. “That’s true! But I ate a little while ago with Kuroo before coming here. It’s all good! Unless, you’re hungry? Then we could totally order some food, cos I wouldn’t wanna trouble you or anything, and you’re looking pretty weak, so I mean, we could probably just chill-“

“It’s okay Bokuto-san.” Akaashi utters, scooting to make some more room on his bed. 

Bokuto eyes the space apprehensively. 

“Are you going to lay down or not?” Akaashi raises an eyebrow. 

At Akaashi’s consent, Bokuto scrambles onto what little space there is on the mattress. Even with Akaashi’s back firmly pressed up against the wall, there’s barely any space between them. 

Slender fingers wrap around a firm arm instinctively. Bokuto looks down in surprise. “You’re gonna fall, Bokuto-san. Move closer.” 

Bokuto scoots more into the bed, so that his arm is resting just above Akaashi’s head and his side is in contact with Akaashi’s front. “Is this okay?”

“You’re warm. It’s nice.” 

There’s a pause.

“So like, are we just gonna sit here, or what?” 

“We could watch something? Could you get my laptop from my bag, it should be on the floor.” 

Boktuo does as he’s told, carefully retrieving the gadget from Akaashi’s bag. 

“D’you have anything in mind?” 

“Honestly, I quite like Star Trek Discovery? I don’t know if you’re one of those extreme fanatics or whatever but it’s a fairly good show. I could care less between Star Trek and Star Wars.” 

“Oikawa would skin you alive if he ever heard you say that.” 

“I’d like to see him try.” Akaashi retorts, a beat too slow. He was beginning to feel lethargic. Especially since Bokuto was some sort of space-heater. 

Bokuto chuckles, then starts the first episode. 

“The graphics are just absolutely enthralling. Had it not been for that fact I probably wouldn’t have bothered. But the plot progresses nicely as an added bonus. I feel like you’d enjoy it.” Akaashi says, his voice even softer than usual. 

It sounds so sweet to Bokuto’s ears. 

“I’ll keep that in mind.” 

A third of the way in, Akaashi’s hands have the cloth of his dry-fit tee bunched up in his hands and his breathing has evened out.

Hesitantly, Bokuto reaches down to push some of the younger’s curls away from his face, marveling at how the inky strands flow like silk between the gaps of his fingers.

Akaashi sighs, shifting closer to the touch, which startles Boktuo a bit, but makes no move to pull away upon seeing that the raven is still asleep. 

It’s then that the realization hits him. He still has training to tend to, and upon checking the time, he sees that he has approximately 3 minutes to get to the gym. 

He curses under his breath, carefully unfurling himself from the comfortable spot on the bed, moving as efficiently and as soundlessly as possible. 

He moves to stand, and then freezes when he hears a whine. He whips back around to see that Akaashi’s expression had soured cutely, nose scrunching and eyebrows pulling. He reaches forward to smooth out the crease that’s formed on the younger’s face, calloused hands touching smooth skin. “I’ll come back later.” He whispers, still a little dumbfounded that the raven had, of all things, _whined._

Bokuto leaves the room slightly winded, and immediately breaks into a sprint. Once he reaces the stairs, he eyes it. Shrugging, he leaps over the banister and lands on the first floor, his legs burning form the strain.

He continues running, and reaches the gym just in time, not having broken a sweat. 

“There you are! You’ve never been late to practice.” Oikawa frowns.

“Sorry! I went to check on Akaashi and he fell asleep.” 

“Check on him? Is he alright?” 

“He’s fine. He seemed exhausted though.” 

Their conversation is cut short by their coach blowing the whistle. 

“Line up for drills! Bokuto, I’d assume you’ve warmed up.” 

Bokuto grins. “You got it, coach!”

\---- 

By the time Akaashi comes around, Bokuto has come back and is sitting at the edge of his bed.

“Hey.” The volleyball player greets. “I came back, to check on you.” _Just like I said I would._

“Hi.”Akaashi breathes, a little disoriented. “What time is it?”

“Seven.” 

“Shit.” He’d slept for four hours? 

“How’re you feeling?” 

“I’m okay. Hungry.” 

“Wanna go grab something to eat?”

Akaashi pushes up onto his elbows. “What do you have in mind?” 

“I’m in the mood for some gyoza.” 

“I wouldn’t be opposed to that.” 

“C’mon, I have a place in mind.” 

After Akaashi finally gets the covers pushed off of his body and he’s rolled the muscles in his shoulders, he moves to stand. 

Bokuto eyes him warily. 

“I’m feeling a bit better now, Bokuto-san. Really.”

“Positive?” 

Akaashi nods.

Wordlessly, the two of them stand to walk towards the doorway, toeing on their shoes and exiting the dorm. 

“Where are the others?” 

“They said they’d go on ahead, as Oikawa insisted that he was _starving.”_ \

“Why didn’t you go with them?” 

“I wanted to make sure you were alright.” Bokuto says, shuffling his feet, abashed. 

“How was your day?” 

“Are we really going for small-talk? I thought we were past that.” Bokuto whines.

Akaashi smiles, kicking at a loose pebble by his foot. “I suppose at this point we could move past that.” 

“You suppose?” 

Akaashi ignores the incredulity in the older’s voice.“Well, for your information, I was quite the spectacle during class today.” 

Bokuto’s eyes widen comically. “Wait I-“

Akaashi has to stop himself from laughing aloud. “I thought you said we were past the small-talk?”

“I didn’t expect you to launch something like that on me!”

Akaashi continues to snicker, and Bokuto clears his throat.

“…What’s it feel like?” 

“To seize, you mean?”

“Yeah, if you don’t mind me asking. You don’t have to answer me if you feel uncomfortable!” Bokut hurriedly tacks on the last part of his sentence. 

“It’s…” Akaashi pauses for a moment, searching for an appropriate word, and Kenma waits patiently at his side. “frustrating, for lack of better word.”

“How so?” 

“Well, think of it this way. You’re having a normal day, you’re enjoying yourself when all of a sudden, you just black-out.

He pauses, a faraway look swirling in his eyes.

“It’s completely humiliating. Even more-so in public. Because it’s not like you can help it yourself, and all you get is unwanted attention.

“I can’t trust my own body anymore, at times. It’s like… it controls me.” 

Bokuto silently mulls over what his friend has just confessed, a bit speechless. “W-well, that’s what I’m here for, right? So that I could take care of you?” 

Akaashi grins, though there’s a hint of remorse at the edges. “Unfortunately.” 

Bokuto frowns at that. “What do you mean by that?” He says, stopping in his tracks. 

Akaashi furrows his eyebrows, before realizing that the context is skewed. “I don’t mean that it’s unfortunate that _you’re_ taking care of me, I mean that it’s unfortunate that you _have_ to. I’m utterly grateful for your presence, Bokuto-san. Don’t think otherwise.

“And if you ever feel like you’ve had enough, just say the word. I’d completely understand if you backed off. Even I get tired of taking care of _myself_ at times.” Akaashi lets out an airy laugh, though there was no mirth to it. 

Bokuto looks at Akaashi, mildly horrified, because if this is what went through his head most of the time, then he had every right to be concerned. 

“You don’t have to be so negative about everything, y’know? And I’m a little offended that you think so lowly of me! I wouldn’t just abandon you like that just cos it’s hard… it makes our friendship all the more meaningful, don’t you think?” 

Bokuto looks Akaashi straight into his eyes, and the latter is startled to find the thoughtfulness that seems to radiate from them.

“I’m a little astounded at your ability to look at things in black and white, Bokuto-san.” 

“Things don’t have to be so complicated all the time, in my opinion.” 

At this admission, Akaashi blinks. It was wildly appropriate. He exhales, the tension bleeding out from his shoulders. 

“That philosophy is so undoubtedly like you, Bokuto-san.” So simple. So profound. Very much ‘Bokuto’.

Bokuto makes a sound of interest. “I’ve never really thought of it as a philosophy… do you have one of your own?” 

“Not particularly, no. But in my mind, you can’t _not_ overthink things… pay attention to the details. Completely opposite to what yours is, really.” 

Akaashi can’t count how many times he’s stayed up late at night, wondering how things could have been different. He fusses over every single detail. 

It’s odd, how one single moment can change so much. How it could make all the difference. He fleetingly thinks, that meeting Bokuto, or being roommates with Kenma, is really making all the difference. 

They reach some quaint little sushi bar tucked between the rows of shops. For once, they didn’t end up at their usual joint, which was Nekomata’s. 

“This place has gyoza that uses shrimp filling instead of pork, and it’s fucking delicious, so.” 

Akaashi is touched at the consideration. “You seem pretty familiar with it, around here. Can I leave it to you to order?” 

“Of course! You can count on me, ‘Kaashi!” 

Somehow, it’s like Bokuto’s words held a double meaning. 

Everything wasn’t so simple when it came to Bokuto. 

Bokuto promptly orders for them mindlessly, like he hadn’t given it much thought. 

“How often do you eat here?”

“Pretty much when I’m not with you guys or when I need some quiet, I end up in here. The food’s good and it’s easy on my wallet. Come to think of it, I don’t think I’ve brought any of the others here, actually. The thought never really occurred to me since we’re always at Nekomata’s anyway. Plus, I kind of like having a place to myself. But I guess now, I have someone to share it with.” 

“I hope I’m not intruding, Bokuto-san?” 

“Don’t be ridiculous! I like having you here.” 

Akaashi looks away, wills his heart to slow down as he traces the rim of his cup with the tip of his finger. 

“You get flustered really easily.” Bokuto points out.

“Hm. Not really…” Akaashi remarks, softly.

“Are you saying I’m special?” Bokuto teases, moving a little closer as he slides his elbow across the counter and into Akaashi’s personal space. 

Their food arrives shortly afterwards. Bokuto picks up a potsticker, blowing on it before he dips it in the soy sauce. 

Only the thing is, he doesn’t put it in his mouth. 

“Say ah,” Bokuto drawls holding the piece of gyoza in front of Akaashi’s lips. 

Akaashi blinks, briefly taken aback, before parting his lips. 

Flavors explode on his tongue, and Bokuto was right. 

The gyoza was, in fact, fucking delicious. 

Now, it must have shown on his face, how much he enjoyed it, because Bokuto laughs, clapping his hands together. 

They talk back and forth aimlessly, simply enjoying the food with good company. 

They go through numerous rows of gyoza, it was kind of ridiculous. 

 

“One more.” 

“I can’t, Bokuto-san, I feel like I might actually _die.”_

“Aw but it’s so good! Come on ‘Kaashi, I know you can do it.” 

Grudginly, Akaashi opens his mouth to devour the last potsticker, furrowing his eyebrows and whimpering. 

The sight was stupidly erotic, or maybe that was just because Bokuto was twisted. 

Akaashi lowers his head to rest against the counter, chewing slowly. 

Bokuto is giggling. “Another set?” 

“No more. I’m in a food coma.” 

Bokuto raises his hand and a server promptly hands them their bill. “It’s my turn to pay.”

At this, Akaashi goes back to sitting straight. “You are _not_ paying for the bill by yourself. I’m pretty sure I ate 3 or so dozens of potstickers. Making you pay for it  
yourself would be a felony.” 

“Oh come on! You’re always making food and paying for our meals whenever we go out.” 

“Exactly, so why would this time be any different?” 

Bokuto pushes a hand into Akaashi’s face as he digs around his pockets for his wallet before laying down a few bills on the tray. 

“Your hand smells like oil and soy sauce.” Akaashi frowns, shaking the hand off. 

Bokuto ignores that. “You can pay for desert.” 

“Desert? We’re gonna have desert?” 

“Well, yeah!” 

Akaashi, rather ungracefully, lets out a burp. 

More like a belch. 

Immediately, his hands come up to cover his mouth as his eyes widen. “Excuse me,” 

Bokuto laughs. “I’m glad you ate well.” 

Their server returns with Bokuto’s change, and they both bow their heads in gratitude before standing up. 

Akaashi stumbles slightly, and Bokuto’s arm snakes around a slim waist. “I don’t think I’ve ever felt this lethargic after a meal.” Sleep sounded like the best thing in the world at the moment. 

 

“Come on, let’s share a cup of frozen yoghurt and walk around for a bit before going back to the dorm. It’s not good to sleep with a full stomach.” 

Akaashi doesn’t really register the way his head rests on Bokuto’s shoulder and his other arm reaching up to grasp the other side. 

Bokuto was so nice. So warm. 

“It’s like you’re drunk, or something.” Bokuto snickers, mildly pleased at the fact that Akaashi didn’t seem to be moving anytime soon. 

They get to the yoghurt booth just as it’s about to close. “Good evening! Would it be possible for us to order?” Bokuto flashes a charming smile.

“Oh! You’re lucky, I’m just about to close!” The middle-aged woman laughs, in the way that middle-aged women usually do. 

Akaashi steps away from his space-heater temporarily, digging into his pockets for some loose change that he hands over. He huddles back into Bokuto’s side, and the older’s arm encircles his waist naturally. 

When had Akaashi become so clingy? Bokuto thought, bemused. 

The woman finally hands over the cup of yoghurt, accompanied with a spoon. 

“Sorry, but could we please have one more spoon?” Bokuto inquires. 

The lady frowns. “Sorry dear, you’re my last customer for the night and it seems like I’ve run out…” 

“It’s alright, we’ll just share. Have a good one!” Akaashi says, and Bokuto is sputtering. “What?” Akaashi raises an eyebrow at his friend. Read: boyfriend.

“You can have the spoon if you want,” Bokuto says.

“What? No, we’re sharing. It isn’t a big deal. Save the environment.” Akaashi shrugs, before holding up the cup in his left hand and opening his mouth.

Bokuto looks at him, confused. 

“Well, you’ve been feeding me the whole night-“ Akaashi deadpans, prompting Bokuto to use his free hand that wasn’t currently around the other’s waist to spoon some into the smaller’s waiting mouth.

What the hell was in the gyoza that made Akaashi so… lax? 

Whatever it was, Bokuto certainly wasn’t complaining. 

Akaashi hums as he waits for Bokuto to get his own share before opening his mouth again. 

They continue like that, with Akaashi holding up the cup and Bokuto feeding the both of them. 

They take the long way back to the dorm, passing through the park while finishing the remnants of their desert. 

Bokuto feeds Akaashi the last of the yoghurt before jogging away to the nearest trashcan to dispose of their garbage. 

“You good?” 

“Yeah.”

Up close, Akaashi still has traces of yoghurt on his lips, and Bokuto, unthinkingly, reaches down, his thumb swiping over Akaashi’s mouth. “You have some yoghurt, still.” He mutters, and it’s then he realizes how near their faces are. 

Akaashi is wide-eyed, speechless, because Bokuto hasn’t moved away, and he’s holding Akaashi’s chin with thumb and pointer-finger now, eyes still trained on the younger’s mouth. 

He mover a little closer, absentmindedly, and Akaashi shows no sign of being uncomfortable. 

An inch. Just a little more. 

Akaashi remembers what Bokuto had said earlier, _“Things don’t have to be so complicated all the time, in my opinion.”_ and decides, fuck it. 

“Are you going to kiss me or what-?” Akaashi whispers, looking up and- 

_Oh._

It was so _nice._

It was a simple kiss. Close-mouthed and chaste. Nothing more. 

Still, Akaashi was left a little winded and breathless after, subconsciously craning his neck to chase after Bokuto once he’s pulled away.

He licks his lips. It tastes like yoghurt. Bokuto was really bad for his heart.

“Wow.” Bokuto breathes, his thumb tracing over Akaashi’s cheekbone, and Akaashi leans into the touch, eyes still closed. “You have no idea how long I’ve waited to do that.” 

“Finally got the courage, did you?” 

“Hey! You made no move to try and kiss me, either!” 

Akaashi laughs, burying his face into Bokuto’s chest, stupidly elated. 

Bokuto hugs him close, rests his chin atop the mess of inky curls. 

Afterwards, they continue their walk back to the dorms, bumping into each other and sharing some pecks in-between, both of them a little incredulous that they’ve finally managed to kiss after all this time. 

They reach their floor a little bit before their curfew, hands links between the two of them. They stop in the middle of the dark hallway.

No one was outside of their dorm, all having retreated at this time of night. 

“You okay?” Bokuto asks, his hand coming up to cup Akaashi’s cheek. 

He feels like he’s done that countless of times over such a short period of time. 

“I’m pretty great, actually. And you, Bokuto-san?” 

“Fan- _fucking-_ tastic.” 

Akaashi giggles at that, which is a sight to behold, because what the fuck, Akaashi doesn’t _giggle._

Bokuto stares at Akaashi for what feels like an eternity. “Can I kiss you again?” 

“You’ve been doing so for the past fifteen minutes, Bokuto-san, -“ 

Bokuto rolls his eyes, leaning in, and pressing their lips together a little more firmly than previously.

They part, and they rest their foreheads together briefly, before moving apart. 

Akaashi feels warm all over. 

“Good night, ‘Kaashi.” 

“Good night, Bokuto-san.” 

Akaashi, rather boldly, steals one final kiss from Bokuto, just on the corner of his mouth, before hurriedly inputting the code to his dorm room and entering. His ears are burning. 

Kenma looks up from his spot on his bed, blinking. “Hey.” 

Akaashi has to bite back a grin. “Hey.” 

 

Bokuto enters his own dorm, grinning. His face kind of hurts from all the smiling at this point. 

“You’re in a good mood.” Kuroo smiles, before highlighting a portion of his textbook. 

“I am.” Bokuto says, flopping down on his bed and folding his arms behind his head. He stares at the ceiling. 

“Well… care to share?” 

“Dude… I can’t… I don’t think I’ve ever been this happy, to the point that, I can’t even form coherent thoughts. Everything just feels so… surreal.” Bokuto breathes.

“Huh. Interesting. Usually, when you’re excited, you never shut up about it… never speechless.” 

Bokuto turns his head to look at his bestfriend. “Akaashi seems have that effect on me, I gather.” 

He hasn’t got the slightest clue as to what spurred Akaashi to be so bold that evening, but he credits the gyoza that he practically _inhaled._

“Potstickers. Thank-fucking-God for potstickers.” He sighs, before closing his eyes. 

 

Akaashi settles under his covers after changing into his pajamas and brushing his teeth. 

“Seems like you enjoyed yourself quite a bit, Keiji.” 

Akaashi bites his lip, again. “Is it that obvious?” 

“Usually, the air around you is neutral. Right now though, it’s buzzing.” 

“Bokuto-san and I kissed.” 

“I guessed. Though had I known you would have been this jovial about it, I would have urged him to do it sooner.” 

Akaashi hums. It was silent for a moment. 

“How are you feeling?” 

“…Like I’m on cloud nine.” 

That has Kenma pause. He looks at his roommate, softening. “I’m happy you’re happy.” 

Akaashi blinks, surprised at the sentiment, before allowing himself to smile. “Thank you, Kenma-san.” 

Bokuto was right. Things really didn’t have to be so complicated. He enjoyed himself tonight, and that was because he didn’t overthink anything. He just went along with it, basked in the moment, relaxed. He probably had way too much fun and his brain was probably rewiring at all the electrical signals that was sent its way tonight, but Akaashi can’t seem to find it in himself to care. 

Because for once, he was thankful for the life he was living. He forgot what his reality was, for a moment, when he wasn’t so completely focused on reminding himself of it all the time. It was nice, to let himself dream, for once. 

But dreams aren’t meant to last forever.

With that final thought, Akaashi forces himself to go over the events of tonight. – Forces it to be the last thing he thinks of before he falls asleep to avoid shitting on his own night.

He falls asleep, content.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HOLY SHIT I'M BACK WITH ANOTHER SHITTY UPDATE SKSKKSKDJSJD FUCK THIS TOOK FOREVER!!!! WRITER'S BLOCK IS A BITCH. I'M ON SUMMER BREAK NOW!!! SO HOPEFULLY I CAN GET AROUND TO DEVELOPING THIS but at this point, don't trust anything I say cos I'm absolute shit at updating... i love u guys. Sorry for the long wait and i'm even more sorry that i took 8 months to write this sorry excuse of a chapter. but i hope.... that u guys can find it somewhat redeemable!!! comments would be greatly appreciated :-)
> 
> \- Basil

**Author's Note:**

> I HAVE A QUESTION
> 
> just out of curiosity, how old do you all think I am?
> 
> Please anticipate my next chapter! :D


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